Halloween: Yard sale.
by weirdDAR
Micheal Myers takes a break from his killing spree to have a...YARD SALE!!!!!!
PG-13 for violence and crude humor and a little sex scene.
*Scene starts out at the myer's house.*
Narrarator: This is the Myer's house. Where, we all know, Micheal Myers once lived. Some say he still lives here. Some say he moved to L.A. Others don't know what the hell we were talking about when we asked them. Anywho, Micheal Myers, indeed, still lives here. Here he comes now
***Micheal Myers(played by Mike Myers) walks into his house holding a Publix grocery bag***
Narrarator: Yes, that is the famous Micheal Myers. Oh, whatever is he doing on this nice Friday night? Preparing for another killing spree? Getting ready for a booty call? Well, the answer is no and hell no. He is preparing for a...YARD SALE!! That's right. Micheal Myers will hold a yard sale, tommorow morning. Selling things from his home.
*Next scene: next morning outside of the Myer's house. At least 7 tables of stuff from Myer's house. Micheal is standing on the front porch. He stares at everyone shopping in his yard. About 5 old ladies and 10 gothic teenagers are there. One of the goth teens come up to Micheal with a broken axe*
Goth teen#1: How much for the broken axe?
*Myers makes a thinking pose and then signals the teen he can have it for free*
Goth teen#1: Thanks, dude!
*Myers gives the goth teen a thumbs up, the teen walks away*
*Another goth teen comes up to Micheal, but without anything*
Goth teen #2: Are you the famous Micheal Myers?
*Myers shakes his head yes*
Goth teen#2: Can I have your autograph?
*Myers shakes his head yes, pulls out his knife and carves his name into the teen's forehead.*
Goth teen#2: *shaken* t-t-thanks! *walks away*
*one of the old ladies faints*
*An old lady brings a set of knifes, which have blood stains on all of them*
OLD LADY#2: How much for these?
*Myers holds up ten fingers*
Old Lady#2: Ten dollars? That's a great price!
*she pulls out a twenty*
Old Lady#2: could you break this 20?
*******WHITE ZOMBIE's "more human than human" starts to play in the background********
*myers is obviously getting pissed off, he takes out a knife and slices the old lady's throat, the old lady that fainted earlier, got up and saw this...she faints again. All the goth teens watch in excitement. Myers takes a chain saw from one of the tables and cuts the fainted lady's leg's off. She dies and everyone(but the goths) run. Myers chases each and everyone, leaving the goths alone, he kills all the old lady's.*
*Myers speak his first words...*
Micheal: ANYONE ELSE WANT ME TO BREAK A 20????
*White zombie's "more human than human" stops playing*
Micheal: (still pissed) I WILL HAVE MORE ITEMS TOMMOROW...I EXPECT TO SEE ALL OF YOU HERE...OR I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN. BRING YOUR FRIENDS! *Myers goes inside. The goths run in excitement*
*IN ONE OF THE GOTH'S (by the name: Dirk)BEDROOM, HE IS WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND, (by the name Trish)*
Dirk: So I was at Micheal Myer's house today...he had a yardsale, he ended up killing all these old ladies, it was so cool.
Trish: Look, Dirk, I'm the attractive survivor of the movie. So let's just have sex. I'm not interested in anything else.
(They start having sex, but for the fun of pissing the audience off, we don't show anything. No nipples, no nothing! HA!)
*NEXT DAY, BACK AT MYER'S FRONT YARD...about 50 goth teens are there, shopping.*
Dirk: Isn't this fun?
Trish: Not as much fun as sex...want to do that?
Dirk: Look, Trish, there is more to sex--wait, what am I saying? I am a teenage male in a horror movie...I love sex!
(They start to have sex there in the yard, Micheal Myers sees them. Myers moves from his porch, towards the two...Norman Bates(played by Jim Carrey) stops him)
Norman: where the have you been, Micheal?*crying* you haven't called since our last date!
*Myers takes his knife and stabs Norman, Norman falls, still crying. Myers keeps walking towards the sex scene...which, by the way is now finnished. Dirk is smoking a cigeratte and Trish is rethinking her sexuality*
*Myers stabs both of them*
Trish: OW! That hurt...you can't kill me! I'm the survivor!
*Myers stabs her again, Dirk is already dead*
Trish: (as she dies,)oh...shit...Jamie Lee Curtis...ended up dying...so I guess the survivor isn't always a...survivor!(Trish officially dies, Myers walks back to his porch)
*Chucky, the evil doll,(Voice by Chris Tucker) comes up to Myers*
Chucky:Yo, my man, we have a meeting tonight. Satan is going to give either you or Freddy the kingdom of hell! Maybe you should stob by the lodge in case you get it!
*myers agrees to going, Chucky leaves....Myers watches everyone shop for evil stuff. He laughs...everyone stares and he stops laughing*
NEXT CHAPTER:(If I get some good reviews)
Micheal attends the meeting. But what he doesn't know, he must FIGHT for the kingdom of hell! evil villains, such as, Candyman(played by Chris Tucker) Jason (Played by Janet Reno) Norman Bates(Jim Carrey) Chucky(Chris Tucker) Freddy (Jim Carrey) and Satan will be played by....(well, you have to read the next chapter to find that out)
by weirdDAR
Micheal Myers takes a break from his killing spree to have a...YARD SALE!!!!!!
PG-13 for violence and crude humor and a little sex scene.
*Scene starts out at the myer's house.*
Narrarator: This is the Myer's house. Where, we all know, Micheal Myers once lived. Some say he still lives here. Some say he moved to L.A. Others don't know what the hell we were talking about when we asked them. Anywho, Micheal Myers, indeed, still lives here. Here he comes now
***Micheal Myers(played by Mike Myers) walks into his house holding a Publix grocery bag***
Narrarator: Yes, that is the famous Micheal Myers. Oh, whatever is he doing on this nice Friday night? Preparing for another killing spree? Getting ready for a booty call? Well, the answer is no and hell no. He is preparing for a...YARD SALE!! That's right. Micheal Myers will hold a yard sale, tommorow morning. Selling things from his home.
*Next scene: next morning outside of the Myer's house. At least 7 tables of stuff from Myer's house. Micheal is standing on the front porch. He stares at everyone shopping in his yard. About 5 old ladies and 10 gothic teenagers are there. One of the goth teens come up to Micheal with a broken axe*
Goth teen#1: How much for the broken axe?
*Myers makes a thinking pose and then signals the teen he can have it for free*
Goth teen#1: Thanks, dude!
*Myers gives the goth teen a thumbs up, the teen walks away*
*Another goth teen comes up to Micheal, but without anything*
Goth teen #2: Are you the famous Micheal Myers?
*Myers shakes his head yes*
Goth teen#2: Can I have your autograph?
*Myers shakes his head yes, pulls out his knife and carves his name into the teen's forehead.*
Goth teen#2: *shaken* t-t-thanks! *walks away*
*one of the old ladies faints*
*An old lady brings a set of knifes, which have blood stains on all of them*
OLD LADY#2: How much for these?
*Myers holds up ten fingers*
Old Lady#2: Ten dollars? That's a great price!
*she pulls out a twenty*
Old Lady#2: could you break this 20?
*******WHITE ZOMBIE's "more human than human" starts to play in the background********
*myers is obviously getting pissed off, he takes out a knife and slices the old lady's throat, the old lady that fainted earlier, got up and saw this...she faints again. All the goth teens watch in excitement. Myers takes a chain saw from one of the tables and cuts the fainted lady's leg's off. She dies and everyone(but the goths) run. Myers chases each and everyone, leaving the goths alone, he kills all the old lady's.*
*Myers speak his first words...*
Micheal: ANYONE ELSE WANT ME TO BREAK A 20????
*White zombie's "more human than human" stops playing*
Micheal: (still pissed) I WILL HAVE MORE ITEMS TOMMOROW...I EXPECT TO SEE ALL OF YOU HERE...OR I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN. BRING YOUR FRIENDS! *Myers goes inside. The goths run in excitement*
*IN ONE OF THE GOTH'S (by the name: Dirk)BEDROOM, HE IS WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND, (by the name Trish)*
Dirk: So I was at Micheal Myer's house today...he had a yardsale, he ended up killing all these old ladies, it was so cool.
Trish: Look, Dirk, I'm the attractive survivor of the movie. So let's just have sex. I'm not interested in anything else.
(They start having sex, but for the fun of pissing the audience off, we don't show anything. No nipples, no nothing! HA!)
*NEXT DAY, BACK AT MYER'S FRONT YARD...about 50 goth teens are there, shopping.*
Dirk: Isn't this fun?
Trish: Not as much fun as sex...want to do that?
Dirk: Look, Trish, there is more to sex--wait, what am I saying? I am a teenage male in a horror movie...I love sex!
(They start to have sex there in the yard, Micheal Myers sees them. Myers moves from his porch, towards the two...Norman Bates(played by Jim Carrey) stops him)
Norman: where the have you been, Micheal?*crying* you haven't called since our last date!
*Myers takes his knife and stabs Norman, Norman falls, still crying. Myers keeps walking towards the sex scene...which, by the way is now finnished. Dirk is smoking a cigeratte and Trish is rethinking her sexuality*
*Myers stabs both of them*
Trish: OW! That hurt...you can't kill me! I'm the survivor!
*Myers stabs her again, Dirk is already dead*
Trish: (as she dies,)oh...shit...Jamie Lee Curtis...ended up dying...so I guess the survivor isn't always a...survivor!(Trish officially dies, Myers walks back to his porch)
*Chucky, the evil doll,(Voice by Chris Tucker) comes up to Myers*
Chucky:Yo, my man, we have a meeting tonight. Satan is going to give either you or Freddy the kingdom of hell! Maybe you should stob by the lodge in case you get it!
*myers agrees to going, Chucky leaves....Myers watches everyone shop for evil stuff. He laughs...everyone stares and he stops laughing*
NEXT CHAPTER:(If I get some good reviews)
Micheal attends the meeting. But what he doesn't know, he must FIGHT for the kingdom of hell! evil villains, such as, Candyman(played by Chris Tucker) Jason (Played by Janet Reno) Norman Bates(Jim Carrey) Chucky(Chris Tucker) Freddy (Jim Carrey) and Satan will be played by....(well, you have to read the next chapter to find that out)