WARNING! EXPLICIT SEXUAL AND RAPE CONTENT! ONLY SUITABLE FOR MATURE AUDIENCES!
Since I was like knee-high, I wanted Christine to choose the Phantom, then I read the book (where the Phantom had a name), and felt it even more there. Raoul I always felt had a controlling, skin-deep relationship with Christine, but Erik had this deeper connection with her.
I decided to make the story more sensual because I think that it shows the true emotions of the relationships perfectly.
My hands trembled as they held my bouquet. One by one, the people who had become my family came and said their farewells, unable to stay for my wedding. Madame Giry gave me a look that held an underlaying disappointment and worry. Lastly, my best friend Meg came to say her farewells. She did not hug me. She clenched my shoulders and whispered harshly through her teeth.
"This is your choice, Christine."
As she left, I took in the gathering around me. There was not one face among them that I knew well. I walked through the church doors and down to the alter where my groom waited. I handed my bouquet to my little flower girl, and turned to the priest and looked down. My wedding dress was spotless and neatly pressed, the large skirts heavy.
I glanced at my groom, Raoul de Chagny. He is not the man I want him to be. I shook my head, clearing it of the thoughts. Of course Raoul was the man I wanted him to be. He was handsome, rich, well-known, and we loved each other, what more could I ask for. I had had nearly given up my own future to make sure that he would live. A single face crossed my mind.
"Raoul de Chagny," the priest's voice broke my thoughts. "Do you promise to care, provide, and love this woman beside you, until death do you part?"
"By the witness of this crowd, I do," he replied smiling at me. His smile seemed empty, it didn't make me feel warm.
My heart started to panic. What am I doing? That single face came to mind then Meg's words came to me.
This is your choice.
Then everything became so clear.
"Christine Daae, do you promise to–"
"No!" I yelled. Picking up my skirt, I ran from the church, ignoring Raoul and the many other people who called to me. I tore the veil and hairpins from my head as I ran. My hair, free from its restraints, whipped in the running wind, waved goodbye to my pursuers.
I ran to the burned down opera-house, straight into my old dressing room. The mirror was still there, generally unharmed by the fire. I pulled on the glass panel and ran into the revealed tunnel. Trusting my heart would lead me to him, I just ran. Anyone who would follow would get lost in the dark and twisted tunnels. I reached the lake and without hesitation, jumped in. My dress weighted me down, trying to stop me from getting to him. I reached the opposite shore, eyes searching for him. Please, let him be here! I begged silently. At the organ sat a hunched over figure dressed in black and white. Erik sat there with his head against the music stand and dark spots from his tears on his trousers and on the ivory keys. In my now ruined wedding dress, I knelt and ran my fingers through his dark hair. One of his hands came up and stopped my stroking. His sad eyes met mine.
"You shouldn't be here, Christine."
"I shouldn't, but I am." I touched his white mask. Finding the edge, I removed it from his face, revealing his deformities. "I love you, Erik. I was too stupid to realize it before, but I love you. I always have. I am so sorry for the horrible things that I said that night. I was scared and foolish. Please forgive me . . ."
Erik did not respond with his words. He pulled me to my feet and crushed my lips with his. I met him with the same ferocity. His tongue forced my mouth open and delved into the warm abyss. It explored and caressed the inside of my lips and teased my own tongue into a battle. They tangled, each trying to claim bounty in the other's mouth.
All at once, he pulled away. I met his eyes, hoping that he wasn't going to push me away, but found love and desire in his eyes. He looked down to the one hand that was clenched. It opened to reveal the wedding ring that he had wanted me to wear that night long ago. I placed my hand over the ring. Erik's strong hand caressed mine as he slid the ring into place. Where it belonged.
Our lips met again and this time there was no stopping us.
I pulled on his shirt pulling him close, pressing my breasts against his chest, then torn at his shirt. I pulled it over his head and touched his strong chest. Running my hands over his chest, my nails lightly scoring his skin, I felt him burning beneath my touch, and I needed his touch, his strength, just as much.
I wanted him.
Erik had managed to unlace my complex wedding gown and was pulling it down my shoulders. His lips left mine and followed the receding fabric down my throat to my collar bone. I gasped at the caresses of his lips. I removed my hands from his shoulder to pull the sleeves off. Now free of any restraint, the dirty and torn fabric fell to the floor. I stepped out of the numerous petticoats, leaving me in a loose sleeveless shift. I was pulled back into his embrace. My hands stroked his bare chest and shoulders, as his explored my waist, back and breasts.
Erik lifted me up, and I wrapped my legs around his hips, causing my shift to slide up my legs, baring my thighs. One of his arms supported me, while the other caressed my bare leg, starting at my knee then traced up to my hip to my waist. My breath hitched at the boldness of the caress. He walked us both to the bed and lay me down. There he continued his loving touches.
His lips caressed every bit of uncovered skin, my neck, my face, my shoulders, my legs and feet. I sighed and gasped at his touches and exploration. I, in turn, kissed, and touched him, returning caress for caress.
Without warning, he lifted my last covering over my head leaving me naked to his gaze. I blushed like a new bride, hesitant under his stare. My love put a hand to my bare skin and caressed my breasts. His kisses now covered every inch of my bare skin. I groaned in pleasure, enjoying every moment of it.
His lips worshiped my breasts. He licked and teased my nipples to hard nubs. Once each was to his satisfaction, he latched on to one and started to suckle. I nearly screeched at the sensation of this intimate caress. Each kiss and caress sent a shot of fire to my center, making me burn for him. When he released me, I rolled and sat up so that I was on top of my love, looking down at him. My prize.
It was my turn. I loved on him, returning caress for caress, kiss for kiss, touch for touch until he once again took control. He shed his trousers and pulled my body against his.
The sensual shock was riveting. His hard member pressed into my soft stomach, trying to find some purchase there, but found none. My love braced himself over my slight frame. He seized my lips and his hands wandered down my sides and legs until he reached my knees. He parted them and set his hand to my most secret flesh.
I arched my back and moaned in want. I just couldn't wait anymore. I wanted him to make love to me. I reached down between us and grasped his ridged member. I heard his breath hitch as I caressed him. I traced the thick veins and the tender head.
He removed his hand from me, then took and anchored my arms above my head, leaving my body to his will. He forced my legs wide with his thighs. He rubbed his erection against my woman's center, bathing it in the salve that my body had created.
I groaned and whimpered. "Please, Erik. Please!" I begged.
And he granted my wish.
He thrust deep within me, without hesitation, piercing my maidenhood. The unexpected pain caused me to cry out, but was quickly replaced with the sensation of my love, so male, so alien, inside me at my very core. I could feel our heartbeats, together inside me.
"Am I hurting you? Should we-" My lips covered his, cutting off his last question and answering anymore he might have had.
And so began our dance of dominance and submission, advance and retreat, tenderness and passion, and above all, love.
My love withdrew from me, then thrust even deeper than before. I moaned into our kiss, silently begging him to increase his slow tempo. He didn't increase the tempo, but he filled me to the hilt with each strong, deep thrust, filling me and himself with undeniable pleasure. He held us there for a while, but he was straining to prolong this meeting, like this was the last time that he would be ever able to love me, like I was going to be taken from him.
I broke our kiss and pressed my hands to his heart. I looked deep into his eyes, wanting him to see my heart, my soul, and hear every word.
"I'm not going anywhere, Erik," I whispered.
With those reassuring words, he pulled me back up into our kiss, and began to ferociously make love to me. With each thrust, he forced out of me a moan of pleasure, each crescendoing in pitch as we rose higher and higher on ecstasy's peak.
I came before him, with a cry. I shattered into a million pieces then was put back together and released on the waves of bliss. My love came soon after. I felt his seed spurt up into my unprotected womb, marking me his forever.
There we lay, tangled in the mess of silken sheets, covered in sweat, for what felt like hours, floating on waves of emotion.
We were one, together, never to be parted again in that bed.
When I came to my senses, Erik had lifted himself from me and was settling a blanket over us. I turned and snuggled into his broad shoulder. His wrapped his arms protectively around me, and we both fell into a deep, sated sleep.
I woke up hours later, cold and alone. I turned around to find Erik was not with me in bed. I sat up, hugging the blanket to cover my bare breasts. I called out his name, but got no response. I wrapped the blanket around me and swung my feet over the side of the bed.
The door swung open. I whispered Erik's name, but it was not him who stood in the door. My abandoned groom stood, grim faced and stone cold, in the doorway. At his side I saw a gun. My mind flew to Erik. Had Raoul killed him like he had sworn to?
Raoul rushed forward and grabbed me by the hair. He hauled me to my feet. My hands flew to his iron grip, releasing the blanket to fall to the floor.
"You whore! That is what you have always been. A whore! How long have you been fucking with this monster? You played me the entire time. Making me believe that you loved me, then abandoning me, embarrassing me in front of all of Paris!"
With each sentence, he slapped my face. He yelled and accused me for minutes. All at once, he stopped. He looked down and saw my nakedness. I shivered at his stare. His breaths started to come in heavy pants. With his free hand he reached up and touched my bare breast. I wreathed, trying to escape his unclean touch.
"Well, since now that I have exposed you for who you are, I guess I can take my slice of the pie. Whatever is left of it, that is." From his jacket, he produced a length of twine.
Raoul was twice my size and easily overpowered me. He bound my hands to the headboard with the twine, then tied my legs, spread eagle, with the sheets on the bed.
His highly aroused panting singed my skin. It felt unnatural. Every touch was a violation of my body. He touched and probed my center, then squeezed and clawed my breasts, causing me to yell in pain.
"That is it. Scream for me, you whore. Let your lover hear you. If he comes to your rescue, I will break his legs and arms then make him watch me take what is rightfully mine."
The threat glued my mouth shut. I would rather suffer this torment then let Erik see me like this, at the mercy of this beast. He grabbed my swelling face and forced his tongue into my mouth. The kiss was sour and bitter. There was no love nor passion, only greed and lust. I nearly threw up at the taste.
His hands weren't gentle. They scratched and grabbed at what he wanted. He left long red trails on my pale skin. Every cry of pain never made it past my lips. Tears were racing down my face and neck. I closed my eyes, not wanting to see this man violate my body.
I felt his lips near my ear. "Beg for me to stop. Beg me to leave you alone. I want to hear you at my mercy."
I quickly turned and latched my teeth onto flesh. I immediately tasted blood. The man roared and punched me. Dazed, I let go and tried to make the world stop spinning. When it did, I glared at the man who was crouched nearly on top of me. His face was curled into a snarl. Blood trickled down the side of his face from his torn ear.
"Beg," he snarled.
I spat on his face, covering it spittle and blood. "Go to hell."
The man punch me again this time knocking me nearly to darkness. I dimly heard the rustle of clothing being shed. As a burning pain erupted from my center, I finally loosed a scream.
This beast, it was no longer a man, forced himself into me. The pain was unbearable. Each time he stabbed into me, a pain-filled cry filled the air. My mind forced my body to try and rid itself of this invasion. I bucked and twisted, trying to lose this tormentor.
"You are mine, you filthy whore." With on final stab, I felt his demon spawn flood into me. I slumped in defeat.
I was defiled. I was no longer pure. This beast has desecrated my body and stained it with his filthy touches and vile spawn.
I no longer fought. I had no more fight left in me, as this beast again and again desecrated and defiled my body. My mind and heart flew to Erik, silently begging him to come rescue me, but he didn't come.
Once Raoul had his fill of me, he untied my legs and forced me to stand. He did not cover me. He herded me outside, and up to the surface, still naked, At the top there stood a group of stagehands and policemen.
"Any sign of him?"
"No sir."
My captor snarled and pushed me forward. I fell to the ground, small stones and sticks pierced my skin and scratched it. The men surrounding me looked toward me with horror.
"What have you done to her?"
"I have punished this woman for what she is. A whore."
I looked up and saw that these men were boys that I had grown up with and knew as well as my family. I stared and begged to them with my swollen eyes. They hardly recognized me, I was beaten so badly.
"Please." I called to each of them by name, but they just stood there unable to do anything.
"Trying to appeal to your past lovers?" Raoul knocked me back to the ground. The animal kicked my stomach, causing me to retch and cough defenseless to his attacks. I felt the anger and indignity flow from the men around us. This beast was losing his mind with jealousy and rage over one man.
Out of nowhere, Raoul was punched to the ground. My hands were released and I was covered by a coat. A pair of arms picked me up and cradled me against a strong chest.
"I am sorry. I should have been there to stop him." I cried into Erik's shirt. He had rescued me. He turned the gathered group. "You have all seen with you own eyes what the Viscount had done to this poor woman, just because she follow her heart. I leave him to your judgments, officers."
"She is mine, you bastard," Raoul roared, "We had an agreement. She is mine rightfully and lawfully."
"Not lawfully," one of the men said.
"That is right. She didn't say vows nor did she sign the ledger," another pointed out.
"She isn't yours," Erik said. He turned to walk back into the opera-house's tunnels and a shot rang out. I felt blood trickle down onto my chest. A red bloom had blossomed on Erik's shoulder, but he paid no mind to it. Shouts and a struggle could be heard from behind us, but we just kept walking into the dark.
Erik walked through tunnels I had never seen before. My Erik hummed a soft lullaby making my eyes heavy. I fell asleep only to be awoken by the sound of gently running water.
I woke up to the soft whinny of a horse. I felt the strong creature walking beneath me. I opened my eyes to see hundreds of fireflies flying around us. I gasped, and realized that we were far outside of Paris. I looked for city lights, but found none. Erik had brought me to a forest far from anyone that would hurt us. The trees had made way for a small creek that swelled into a pool seemed to hold the moon in its depths. I can hardly describe the beauty of this small haven. It seemed like at any moment a fairy court might come fluttering in and dance in the moonlight, or a water nymph might jump out of the water, singing a capturing lullaby.
It was a hidden paradise.
Erik dismounted and put my feet on the ground near the water's edge, then led the horse to a nearby tree and tied it there. I pulled his coat close, not wanting him to see the markings of my defilement. I kept my eyes fixed on the ground, shame written clearly on my face. Two arms wrapped around me and pulled me close.
"I know what he did to you. I wish I could've saved you from that vile torment."
He tried to turn my face to kiss me, but I broke away.
"Please, don't." My chin quivered.
"Why?"
"Because he touched me. I am not worthy of your love anymore. I am defiled, unclean. He made me filthy, disgusting. If you had seen the things that he had done to me-"
"No, I didn't see what he did," Erik cut in, "but I do know what he did, and if I know you like I do, I know that you fought him as best as you could. Do you love him or me?" He pulled off his mask, showing me his entire face, reminding me why I had run to Raoul, but also what had brought me back.
"You, of course, but-"
"Then that is the only thing that matters. I love you and you love me. Yes, he may have touched and used your body, but he could never have your heart or mind."
Erik turned me around and held my face. He kissed the tears off of my cheeks. "I don't care that you were raped by that beast of a man. It was just that. Rape. You almost went into marriage with that man, which would have given you money and security, but you chose me and loved me. For that, I will trust you and love you to the end of time."
The words soothed like balm on a burn, but it did not quench the feeling of unworthiness and uncleanliness. I had chosen Raoul first. Nothing could change that fact. I had hurt Erik far more than he let on. I had abandoned him all because he was deformed and I thought him evil.
I was the true monster here.
Behind me, I heard splashing. I turned to see Erik waist deep in the clear pool, still fully clothed. Blood ran sluggishly down his shoulder where the bullet had pierced him. He held out his arms to me, unaware that his shoulder was hurting him. "Come here, my Angel of Music. Let me cleanse him from you and erase his touch from your skin."
The words were so promising. They pulled me to the water, one small step at a time. I entered the lighten pool, Erik's jacket still wrapped tightly around me. Erik reached out and stroked my bruised and swollen face. The pain and tenderness melted away at his touch. He cupped his hands, filling them with water. He pour handful by handful over my head and my covered body. The pain washed away with the water, and after one last handful, Erik pulled way his wet jacket to reveal my body.
I gasped in surprise. The red trail and scratches that the beast had left on my skin were gone. I felt my face. The swelling and bumps were gone. I cried tears of joy. It was as if I had never been touched by Raoul. My lover's warm hand slipped around my waist and pulled me to him.
"Now you are visibly clean. Will you let me wash away every last trace of him?"
I nodded until his lips met mine. They were gentle and soft. He tenderly and softly touched and worshiped my body. Every inch of my skin, he caressed and smoothed. He ran his hands through my wet, long hair and followed its trail to the top of my bottom. I shivered as his fingers feathered along my bare spine. He played with the small indent there, then the line that led all the way to my center, but left that small place alone.
The contrast between Erik's touch and Raoul's was night and day. These loving touches and gentle caresses made me feel beautiful and secure. Erik made my body tingle with wholeness, beauty, and love.
When passion took me, it was a gentle, loving need, not a vicious, forceful want. I shivered and clung to my lover. Every memory of my rape was being washed away by new memories of love. Erik lifted and carried my out of the water. He found a grassy spot and lay me down. He removed his own clothes, and continued his love and worship of my body.
This time, our passions didn't battle for dominance. I let him lavish me in love. The only time I started to fight was when he started to part my legs.
"I won't force you, beloved. You have had one man too many force himself on you. I won't make it two."
I heard the love and sincerity in his voice. I looked into his eyes. They were loving, understanding and soft. He smiled softly when he saw the fear and worry in my eyes. He brushed his fingertips across my temple.
"I love you. I won't let him anywhere near you again. Trust me. You don't have to be afraid anymore. You are safe." I reached up and brushed a stray hair out of his face. Erik held my hand there, then took it from his face. He kissed the tips of my fingers, then the palms of my hands. His lips trailed down my arm and across my shoulder.
My fear melted away. My body couldn't wait anymore. Beneath him, I slowly parted my legs. My lover felt this and tenderly changed his course. His lips went between my breasts and down my stomach to the crook of my hip, then between my legs. I gasped and sighed as I felt his tongue and lips caress my center. He made love to me, bringing me to my climax, then returned his lips to mine.
I could taste my arousal on his lips.
My love braced himself over my body. I opened myself wider so he could fit himself between my thighs. He didn't forge his way into me all at once. He slowly little by little, with gentle thrusts entered me. He wanted me to feel loved, not used.
I was stiff and still under him, a remnant of fear still lingering in my mind. Don't you love him? Then show him.
Burying that final fear, I focused entirely on Erik. As he braced himself to enter me again, I met him and joined him in the slow tempo, raising up to meet him. I saw him smile at this sign of trust. I smiled back and placed my lips to his.
We made sweet love under the moonlight. If someone had asked me about Raoul, I would have answered, "Who is Raoul?" Erik had washed away every single trace of that man with his love.
I never saw Paris again. Erik and I bought a small house near to that little haven and lived together with our many children. Each child had inherited our love of music, and each one learned to sing as beautifully as an angel chorus. They never thought anyone or anything was ugly. Erik and I had taught them that everyone was beautiful underneath, and to look beyond looks.
Erik and I never stopped loving each other. We had fought and disagreed on so many things, but we didn't let any of it get the better of us because deep down in our hearts, we understand something.
Erik will always love his Angel of Music, and I will always love my Phantom of the Opera.