When Jim entered the bridge, he was smiling widely. Spock was at his station, working diligently. Jim's smile grew impossibly bigger as he strolled across the room, his hands behind his back. He sat down in his captain's chair, resting one hand on his lap, while the other was propped up on the arm rest.
Chekov turned to tell the captain something, but paused when he saw Jim's hand. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion, but went on with his report, pretending not to notice anything unusual. Sulu must have noted the strange tone of Pavel's voice. He turned his head to look at the captain and snorted. Chekov looked at Sulu nervously before looking back at Kirk, who was laughing quietly. Chekov smiled and joined in.
Kirk put his finger to his lips, hushing them. He tried to compose his face before he said out loud, "Spock, has there been any readings out of the normal?"
Spock began to speak but before he could get a word out, Jim interrupted him in a high pitch voice.
"The only thing abnormal is how cool you are captain."
Spock turned from his chair in confusion. Kirk turned his hand so that Spock was staring straight at the white tube sock that covered it. It had a black bowl cut and slanting eyebrows drawn crudely on with a black marker. A Starfleet science division insignia was drawn on the the neck of the sock. Spock's head tilted slightly to the side as he stared into the two large black dots that represented eyes. Kirk was trying hard not to laugh.
Spock stopped staring at the sock and met Jim's eyes. "Captain, I do not understand."
Sulu began laughing. Kirk kept his cool.
"Understand what?"
"I do not understand why your hand is adorned with a sock that has been drawn on."
Kirk gasped. "How dare you talk about my first officer like that!"
The sock hung it's head and began making small crying noises. Kirk used his free hand to bring it to his chest, patting it consolingly.
"The mean Vulcan didn't mean it, Sock."
A slight hint of annoyance touched Spock's voice. "Captain, I do not understand this practice. As your first officer, I must ask you to please expl-"
The sock shot away from Kirk's chest so that it was facing Spock. Jim moved his fingers so that the sock appeared to be moving it's mouth.
"I don't know what you're talking about." Jim said, his voice high. "I'm the first officer on this ship. Nobody loves the Captain more than me."
The slight annoyance became more prominent in Spock's features. Chekov was hiding a smile behind his hand. Spock took a breath and tried again.
"Captain, I-"
"Look at me, I'm Spock, I wish I were as cool as Jim but that's logically impossible-"
"Captain please-"
"I like to wear booty shorts when no one is around-"
"That is untrue-"
"Feelings are for losers-"
Jim was laughing now, his voice cracking as he tried to maintain the high falsetto. Spock's cheeks were a light green. The whole bridge was laughing.
Spock's jaw set as he sprang from his position, pulling the sock deftly from Jim's hand. Jim made a small protesting noise as Spock balled up the sock and stomped on it.
The bridge was silent. Spock straightened up, his hands neatly behind his back. The sock lay by his feet, crumpled. Jim coughed, hiding another laugh.
"Everyone back to work."