Nobody who had ever met Phil Coulson would ever be able to, honestly, claim that he was anything other than devoted to SHIELD. There were some that even joked that Coulson was married to his work, in the same way that Fury and Hill were.
None of the ones who said this, however, really knew the Agent well enough to be told his biggest secret. It was highly classified information, and only a select few knew that Phil Coulson was in fact married.
Phil had met Audrey when he was still a young agent. She'd been an acrobat back then, specialising in trapeze acts and stunts high off the ground, although she'd retired and devoted her life to music, specifically the cello, after they'd been married. Phil's love and devotion to Audrey was equal, if not greater than his love for SHIELD, and the day of their marriage, after a long engagement, was one of the best of Phil's life.
Seven years passed quickly, with Phil often away on missions for SHIELD, and Audrey keeping herself busy with her music and her new job, teaching music at the local elementary school. Whenever they were together they were besotted with one another, as if they were teenagers, rather than a married couple whom were getting closer to thirty years old with every passing day.
Phil knew in his heart that he would never forget the happiness he had felt the day he came home from a two week long mission in early November, to find Audrey had a wrapped gift for him, even though his birthday had been in July. For a moment Phil had feared that he'd forgotten their wedding anniversary, but Audrey had reassured him that he'd done nothing of the sort.
"Besides", she had laughed, "our anniversary is in April."
Laughing at his own foolishness, Phil had opened up the box, his eyes widening when he saw the small white stick in a long thin box, cushioned on pale blue and pink tissue paper. Phil had never seen a positive pregnancy test before in his life until that moment, but he knew immediately what it was.
The very first person that Phil told about the pregnancy had been Nick Fury, who despite his reputation as a bad ass, had been genuinely pleased for his friend. It was no secret to those who knew Phil and Audrey that they both loved children and Audrey had plans for a large family, despite Phil being away so much on missions.
It was at that early stage when, in secret, Phil and Fury began making contingency plans should something happen...a way to keep Phil's family safe. Procedures were developed, and a safe house that only Fury, Phil and Audrey knew about set up. Hidden, untraceable bank accounts were set up, and a hidden cache of canned food, bottled water, and baby things, was placed not far from the Coulson family home.
Thoughts about every contingency plan that he and Fury had set up, however, were far from Phil's mind on the night of the 25th of April 2003, when his son came into the world, five weeks before his estimated date of arrival. He'd been tiny in Phil's arms when the doctor had passed him to Phil, his loud crying calming once he was held by his dad.
Clint Francis Coulson was a reasonably easy baby to look after, although he was a very active and squirmy. He didn't cry much, slept through the night from about the age of six months, and he loved his food. If he wasn't sleeping or eating, then he was playing and moving around, even when he was barely a month old. He was happiest when Phil was playing with him, although he was also very fond of his Godfather, who was, naturally, the director of SHIELD himself. Phil had a photo up on the wall at home of a very young Clint, maybe aged two or three, sitting on Fury's lap, his tousled blonde hair sticking up everywhere, wearing a black eye patch and a miniaturised version of Fury's trademark black leather trench coat, his expression near identical to the one of the man holding him.
Audrey was the first to comment, when Clint was only a few months old, how similar Clint was to Phil. Clint had inherited most of his looks from Phil, although he had sandy blonde hair that was a similar colour to his mother's. Fury had joked that Clint would grow up to become an agent like his dad, and Phil hadn't been able to bring himself to comment. The very thought of his baby boy becoming an agent and doing the things Phil did terrified him and made him wish that Clint would stay young forever so that he would always be safe.
Of course, that didn't happen, with Clint growing from a little baby to an adventurous toddler who would somehow get into all kinds of trouble. Phil was convinced that Audrey must have passed on some of her skills from her acrobat days in the circus, because Clint was forever climbing up into places that he shouldn't be in. It seemed that the higher off the ground he was, the happier Clint was. Naturally, that meant that perching up on the shoulders of his 'Uncle Nick' was one of Clint's favourite places to be.
Phil didn't mind Nick piggy backing his son around the house...at least the director was keeping a firm grip on Clint's feet to prevent him from falling, a safety measure that hadn't been in place the day that Clint climbed on top of a eight feet tall book case, and was apparently so comfortable up there, he curled up and went to sleep. Years later, and Phil still could never figure out how Clint had managed to climb up there without knocking any books over, or bringing the whole bookcase down. Audrey, once she'd got over the fright, had giggled to herself.
"Maybe he has inherited a little bit from me," she'd conceded with a small smile.
It wasn't too long after the infamous bookcase climbing episode that Phil and Audrey found out that she was pregnant again. This time around Phil was a lot calmer about altering the protocols already in place to adjust to the newest member of his family, as well as making adjustments as far as Clint was concerned. It wasn't like they were going to need bottles and baby food for the almost three year old anymore.
Phil had ended up missing the majority of Clint's third birthday thanks to being held up on a mission, but when he finally stumbled through the door of his home he knew that Audrey was still up. He could hear the muted sounds of the TV in the living room. He put away his gun in the locked safe, with the clip taken out and put in a separate, locked, container. He knew that he couldn't be too careful with Clint running around.
Taking off his jacket and hanging it on its hook, Phil slipped off his shoes and then headed into the living room, stopping in the doorway, a smile spreading across his face. Audrey and Clint both lay on the couch, sound asleep. Clint's arm was draped of the considerable swell of Audrey's stomach, protecting his unborn sibling, perhaps. Audrey's arm was around Clint, preventing him from falling off the couch, holding him as closely as she could this far into her pregnancy. Audrey was already further into her pregnancy than she had been with Clint when she'd gone into labor. In fact, the estimated due date for the new baby was mere days earlier than the date they had predicted for Clint. Theoretically, Phil knew that their second child could arrive at any moment.
Still, a wry smile on his face at the sight in front of him, Phil had snapped a picture on Audrey's camera, before he picked Clint up and carried him to bed, kissing him on the forehead as he tucked him into bed.
Despite how early Clint had been, Phil and Audrey's second child didn't arrive until a few days after his estimated date of arrival. Leopold Nicholas Coulson, or just Leo as everyone called him, was named after Audrey's dad and was born on the thirty first of May, 2006...three years to the day after Clint was supposed to be born.
From the first moment Clint laid eyes on Leo, Phil knew that he wouldn't need to worry about Clint ever being jealous of his little brother...not as long as he wasn't neglected in favour of Leo. Phil had never seen Clint so enraptured and obviously in love with something like he was when he first met Leo. Phil and Audrey both took a lot of photos in those early days of their boys together, Leo propped up against Clint's body and the elder gazing affectionately at the younger.
Leo wasn't as easy to look after as Clint had been as a baby, although at the same time he couldn't be considered to be difficult. Many of Phil and Audrey's friends who had young children commented on how easy the Coulsons had it, and told horror stories about their own children's early infancy.
Leo was prone to getting sick with low grade fevers in the first few months of his life, which made him tired and cranky and difficult to settle. Phil and Audrey both spent long nights staying up, trying to rock Leo back to sleep while Leo cried in their arms, both of them worried that the noise would wake up Clint, who was a light sleeper. Thankfully though it only took a few weeks for Clint to get desensitised to the sound of his little brother's crying.
Luckily, by the time Leo was almost six months old, he stopped getting sick, his immune system finally catching up and protecting him from whatever was causing the fevers. Leo settled down into a routine, and thrived in it, much to the relief of his worried parents.
As time passed, it became apparent that, even though physically Leo took after Clint, with dark blonde hair, although his was curly while Clint's was straight, and a generally serious expression, they were vastly different in other ways. Leo would babble away to himself continuously, while Clint had always been quieter, and while Leo didn't reach physical milestones as quickly as Clint had, he was faster reaching cognitive milestones, and was younger than Clint had been when his babbling became actual words.
Despite the differences between Clint and Leo, Phil and Audrey loved their sons equally, as devoted to their offspring as they were to one another. Audrey affectionately began calling Clint her little wolf, for his stoic attitude, and Leo her little bear, for his love of bear hugs and generally affectionate nature, and Phil had to agree that the nicknames suited their two little boys like gloves.
Time passed as it always has, and the two boys grew. Clint was soon an energetic five year old and Leo had grown into a chubby cheeked two year old who, while less prone to getting into mischief than his brother had been, was continuously asking questions and trying to figure out how the world around him worked. When Clint wasn't at school the pair were never far from one another, and Phil and Audrey watched over them proudly, their joined hands resting over the bump in Audrey's stomach.
Clint and Leo had both been overjoyed to learn that they would be getting a new sibling. They were both convinced that it was going to be another boy, although Phil and Audrey had decided not to find out. It made getting baby stuff harder to get, but they liked the surprise at the end. It was a nice surprise, and Coulson liked the idea of a nice surprise that was a stark contrast to all the bad surprises he encountered at work. They'd done the same when Audrey had been pregnant with Clint and Leo as well, opting to wait until they were actually born before finding out their gender.
Every night, while Phil gave Leo his bath, Clint would sit and read a goodnight story to the baby in his mother's stomach, before he kissed the bump and went to bed. Leo chattered away to the baby, and early on in the pregnancy he had asked a lot of questions...some of which made Phil and Audrey cringe and flounder for child appropriate answers. Parenting sites on the internet had been a very useful resource during those days. As time had passed, though, the questions about the baby stopped, and Leo simply watched and touched his mother's bump in fascination. The first day Audrey felt the baby kick, it was in response to Leo's voice. The look of wonder on the little boy's face as he felt the fluttering movements beneath his hand, held in place by Audrey, was one of the cutest things Phil had ever seen, and he had taken some photos, immortalising the moment.
Summer arrived, and Clint and Leo were given a job to do while they were at home alone with their mother. Help to keep her cool. Clint and Leo had both been spring babies, so Audrey hadn't had to worry about how uncomfortable it was to be heavily pregnant during the summer months. This time around, however, it couldn't be avoided. Despite being so young, and usually so active and mischievous, the boys had taken their job very seriously. Cool, wet cloths were applied to Audrey's warm face and arms regularly, the boys carefully relaying clothes back and forwards between wherever Audrey was, usually the couch, and the kitchen sink to freshen them up. Clint took to gently spraying her face with cool water from a spray bottle, which Audrey rather enjoyed, and Leo fanned her and carried her little bowels with ice blocks in them for her to suck on.
This time around Audrey was only just over two weeks away from her due date when she went into labour, but Phil had been called out on an emergency mission, and was in a remote location in Europe. Nick Fury, however, had stepped in, arranging an extraction in order to get Phil and his team of agents out and on their way back to the States within a few hours of Audrey calling Fury and telling him what had happened.
Luckily for Phil, although perhaps unluckily for Audrey, the labor lasted long enough for Phil to get to the hospital and witness the birth of his and Audrey's third child...and first daughter. It was late in the evening of the 28th of August 2008. Audrey had been too exhausted after the very lengthy labor to hold her daughter, but she had watched on, tears shining in her eyes, as Phil cradled his daughter for the first time. Phil had cried too as he gently rocked the carefully wrapped baby in his arms, taking in everything there was to see about his daughter through hazy eyes.
Phil had still been misty eyed when he called Nick, who had offered to stay with the boys at the Coulson family home. It was late when he made the call, and Nick had already managed to get the boys to go to bed, although really, he had just kept them active and let them run around crazily for most of the afternoon, and then waited for them to pass out before carrying them to their beds. Even Fury had gotten emotional as Phil described how perfect the baby girl was.
The next day Fury escorted Clint and Leo into the hospital so that they could visit their mother, and meet their brand new baby sister. The newly named Jemma Rose Coulson had been sound asleep in her mother's arms when the boys had arrived at the hospital, and, Phil, Audrey and Nick had all watched as Clint and Leo get their first look at the newest member of the family.
Just like he had been with Leo, Clint was instantly besotted with his little sister, and Phil had secretly smiled at the thought of high school aged Jemma bringing home boyfriends and her college aged big brother scaring them off. Leo was a bit slower to warm up to Jemma, although his curious nature made him want to watch her continuously.
Jemma's first name had been easy for Phil and Audrey to pick out. While it hadn't been one of the names they'd considered the first two times Audrey had been pregnant and they hadn't known if they needed boy names or girl names, it had been a name that they'd both liked. Phil had always planned on giving his firstborn daughter the same middle name as her mother, and the name Rose went back generations in Audrey's family. It seemed a fitting way to honour a good tradition. Besides, Jemma Rose suited the little baby, with her dark crop of hair, her rosey complexion, and her cheerful disposition.
While neither of Phil and Audrey's older children had been difficult in their infancy, Leo's fevers aside, Jemma took it to a whole new level. She slept through the night from only four weeks old, she rarely cried, she was rarely sick and she quickly got the hang of suckling at her mother's breast. Phil and Audrey's friends bemoaned how lucky the couple were to have three perfect children, and Phil and Audrey could only smile and nod in pride.
Physically, Jemma didn't look much like her brothers. Clint and Leo were both blonde, like their mother, while Jemma's dark straight hair had echoed Phil from the moment she was born. Jemma's face, with her chubby cheeks and wide eyes with long eyelashes, was identical to Audrey's, with the similarity being apparent from early days, and becoming more pronounced with every day that passed.
Personality wise, Jemma was similar to Leo, although she smiled far more than either of her serious faced brothers. Jemma was forever watching the world around her through her wide eyes, and she was happiest when she was in either Phil or Aubrey's arms, looking out at the world, when they were outside, picking Clint up from school or walking down to the local shops.
Jemma was barely ten months old when it became apparent that her days of being carried around, by Audrey at least, were numbered. Phil hadn't expected the fourth positive pregnancy test he'd seen...not so soon after Jemma had been born anyway. Sure, he and Audrey had been taking advantage of all of their children's good sleeping habits from time to time, and had enjoyed having a roll in the sheets, and they hadn't bothered with contraception, assuming they were safe because Audrey was still breast feeding Jemma. It soon became apparent that they weren't as safe as they had thought, and it looked like there would be a new edition to the Coulson household early in the new year, less than eighteen months after Jemma had been born.
Phil, however, had other things on his mind in addition to the approaching arrival of his fourth child, because the May after Jemma was born, Tony Stark was kidnapped by the Ten Rings terrorist cell. He was found the following August, just before Jemma's first birthday, and by the end of the October of 2009 he had proclaimed himself as being Iron Man. It was a very busy few weeks that followed for Phil, who didn't have many opportunities to spend time with his pregnant wife and three children.
Christmas that year was a quiet one, with Phil only able to get a few days off work, and Audrey being seven months pregnant and struggling with the exhaustion associated with being so heavily pregnant, as well as having a very active six year old, an three year old that was full of questions, and a one year old that was fond of toddling around after her older brothers and straying out of her mother's sight. Still, it was a happy time in the Coulson household, none of them aware of the turmoil that lay just around the corner.
Phil and Nick Fury, preoccupied with dealing with the aftermath of Tony Stark's revelation, and the initial development of the Avengers initiative, were caught unaware of the events that took place in the second half of January 2010.
Years before any of the children had been born, Phil had lead a team investigating, and then dealing with a group trying to establish a Hydra base in rural America. The group was successfully dismantled, with a few of the Hydra supporters being killed n the crossfire, although most of the members of the group were jailed for various offences, ranging from firearms offences, to assaulting a federal agent, to pre existing murder convictions. Natasha Romanoff, the Balck Widow, had been a part of that team, along with seven other agents, who Phil had trusted and got along well with.
Little did he know that, in secret, one of the Agents, Michael Collins, had actually been a member of the group, and had supported Hydra's philosophy for years before he'd even joined SHIELD, and he wanted revenge on Coulson and the rest of the team, not only for preventing the establishment of an American Hydra base, but also for the deaths of some of Collins' friends, and his cousin, who was shot during the attack .
Collins waited and bided his time, knowing that his revenge would need to be thoroughly planned. He knew how Phil thought, and how perceptive and paranoid the man was. Just before Tony Stark declared that he was Iron Man, however, a window of opportunity opened for Collins. He was promoted to a level seven operative, which gave him access to far more information about Coulson than he had ever been able to access before.
It wasn't widely known that Coulson had a family, even amongst level seven agents of SHIELD. Not even all of the level eight operatives knew the truth. The number of agents that knew the truth was kept to a minimum, a decision that Fury and Coulson had agreed on without any discussion.
When Michael Collins was doing his research on Coulson, however, he hadn't needed to find the information about who Coulson lived with. Using his new level seven clearance, Collins was able to sift through SHIELD's database and find Coulson's personal records, including his address.
A few days later, knowing that Coulson was on a mission, Collins went to the address with the intention of setting up explosives for the next time Coulson came home. However, when he was approaching the house, he had been surprised to see the lights were on. Curious, Collins had approached a window and peered in, and had been surprised to see three children and a heavily pregnant woman sitting on a couch together, the woman reading to the children from a thick book.
Collins immediately knew that this was Coulson's family, his wife and children, and his plans changed. He abandoned his plans to kill Couilson, wanting to inflict the most amount of pain possible on the man...and what could be more painful for someone like Coulson to lose his wife and children.
Collins started to make preparations to enact his plan, but he never had a chance to complete his preparations. One of his accomplices, a younger agent that Collins had taken under his wing and manipulated into doing his bidding, sent Fury an anonymous message, alerting him to the danger Mrs. Coulson was in. Angered, Collins shot the young agent and left his body in a ditch, not far from the Coulson family home, but the damage had already been done, and the procedures that Phil and Nick had spent days and days setting up back before Clint was born, were put into place.
Phil was flown back to America, directly to the alpine safe house that Fury had set up. It was a remote property, with a large house on the top of a steep mountainside, with good visibility of the winding road that weaved it's way up the mountain. The whole point of the safe house was to make sure that whoever was living there could see who was coming.
Audrey, only a week and a half away from her due date now, and the children, were escorted by two trusted agents to the safe house, their journey delayed by the frequent toilet stops Audrey needed to make, and the treacherous weather conditions. A winter storm was brewing, and the Agent who was driving their SUV had to be careful on the narrow winding roads.
Collins, however, had managed to follow the SUV containing Audrey, and had cut across the mountains to intercept their SUV.
Phil would never forget the moment he set eyes on the car that containing his wife and children, weaving it's way up the mountain, Fury watching from beside him. The SUV was still some distance away, their speed limited by the winding road, and by the snow that was falling in flurries to the ground.
Phil would also never forget the second SUV that came speeding along a disused track and turning onto the main road, lining up for the SHIELD SUV that contained Audrey, Clint, Leo and Jemma.
The sound of crunching metal, fibreglass and plastic became Phil's least favourite sound the moment the two Cars impacted with one another, the road too narrow to allow for the Agent driving to get out of the way. The speed and momentum of the other SUV sent Audrey's car spinning out of control, loosing traction on the slippery road, before it plummeted off the edge of the road and down the mountainside, rolling and flipping, before it came to a stop, upside down, almost three hundred yards from where it had started off. Phil never remembered the mad sprint down the mountain to where the wreck of Audrey's car laid, Fury racing along behind him, not quite able to match Coulson's speed.
By the time Phil reached the car some other agents who had been standing closer to the original crash site were already there, prying open the crumpled doors of the SUV. Phil almost dived into the car, to see his family, only to be held back by Fury. Phil's voice was going hoarse from his screaming and yelling the names of his family, and it took all of Nick Fury's considerable strength to hold him back.
Phil had known, logically, that he wouldn't have been much help. There were more than enough Agents working on helping his family, and the emergency services were on their way, but he still wanted to be there and too see his family.
The first person pulled out of the wreckage was the Agent who had been driving, a man who Phil didn't recognize. Phil didn't need to be told to know the man was dead, the man's skin already looking pale, beneath the blood he was soaked in.
Phil was too busy staring in horror at the fallen agent, unable to comprehend how much damage had been done to his body, and at the same time terrified that his family would be found in the same condition, that he missed the first audible cry that came from the inside of the SUV. The second cry, however, brought Phil out of his thoughts, and he looked back at the flurry of activity around the rear doors of the SUV in time to see one of the Agents, very carefully, lift Leo out of the car, the little boy crying and clinging to the agent.
Nick Fury let his arms drop and Phil ran to his son, carefully taking him from the other agent's arms. Leo sobbed and clung to Phil tightly, while Phil tried to see if his son was seriously hurt. There was a gash on the little boy's forehead that was sluggishly bleeding, and there was bruising already showing up on his shoulder where his child seat strap went, but other than that Leo seemed to be okay.
Phil hugged his son tightly, waiting for the paramedics and watching as the Agents, now helped by Nick Fury himself, worked to get the second Agent, Audrey, Clint and Jemma out of the car.
It didn't take long for the next person to get pulled from the wreckage. Audrey's limp body was pulled from the side opposite to where Phil was standing, and Fury returned to his side, holding him back from approaching his wife's side. Phil, however, stopped struggling, when he saw his wife's limp body laid out on the cold ground. His knees gave out beneath him as he took in the damage, her dark blonde hair, the same shade as Leo and Clint's, was heavily mattered and stained with blood, her skin pale, the rise and fall of her chest barely visible.
Phil's breathing became laboured as he looked at his wife, and he couldn't even feel Fury holding onto him from his place at Phil's back, trying to get him to breathe deeply, to fight off the panic that was squeezing his chest like a vice.
Fury's efforts to calm Phil out of his panic attack were ineffective as Phil's' vision began to darken, the last thing he saw before he lost consciousness was Audrey's bloodstained, pale face.
AGENTSofSHIELD/AVENGERS
When Phil awoke, it was to a light and airy hospital room, an IV needle in his hand, and Nick Fury at his side, looking wearier than Phil had ever seen him before. Phil's memories came flooding back, of the crash, and of the aftermath, and his breathing caught in his throat.
"Take it easy Phil, I need you to relax," Fury had instructed, his deep voice calming. Phil blinked.
"Audrey? The kids?"
"Leo and Jemma are going to be fine, they were protected from the worst of the impacts and they've only got a couple of scratches and bruises." Fury told Phil, glancing to the opposite side of the room. Phil turned his head, spotting the other bed in the room, as well as a hospital crib. He could see the top of Leo's head, his curly hair messed up, and Jemma's round face, pink and healthy looking, both of them obviously sound asleep.
"How long has it been?" Phil asked, dread building in his stomach. He had noticed how Fury hadn't mentioned Audrey or Clint.
"Five hours since the crash," Fury answered, his voice grave. Phil looked back up at the director of SHIELD.
"Audrey and Clint?" he asked, Phil's' voice thick with dread, and grief. Fury sighed.
"They're both still being operated on. Clint will be alright, one of his ribs punctured his lung, and he had some internal bleeding, but they've managed to fix him up. They're just finishing up on him now, and then he'll be in recovery for a bit. The SUV...It wasn't good Phil, from the looks of it Audrey and Clint threw themselves over Leo and Jemma to protect them when they went off the road. Agent Avery had been trying to protect them as well. Both she and Agent Hastings were dead by the time we got to them, and we couldn't revive them."
"Audrey?" Phil choked out.
"She's still alive, but, Phil, it isn't looking good. She'd got major head trauma, early scans indicated that she's broken her back in three places, and her blood pressure is dangerously low, and that was just what they could tell me before she went into theatre. They wanted me to prepare you for the worst."
"The baby?" Phil asked fearfully. Audrey was less than two weeks from her due date. To lose the baby now would break her heart.
"They attached Audrey to a foetal heart monitor when she was on her way to hospital, and it looked okay. They told me that, if Audrey starts to deteriorate more, they're going to perform a caesarean, since she's so close to being full term. The doctors said that not having to support a nearly due baby will help Audrey's body recover."
Phil nodded, his eyes misting over at the news. Audrey's life hung in the balance, and there was nothing he could do to help protect her, not anymore.
It wasn't long after that that Phil's eyes grew heavy once again, and he glared at Fury, and the IV in his hand, knowing that he was being drugged.
"I'm sorry, Phil, but you need to rest. I'll keep an eye on your family for you."
Phil could do nothing buy blink as his body surrendered to the power of the sedative he was being given, and he drifted off to sleep.
It was three hours later when Phil woke up, the IV now no longer inserted into the back of his hand, a bandaid in it's place. Fury was sitting at his bedside, but Phil knew that he had moved while Phil had been asleep. Leo and Jemma lay on either side of him, curled up against his side, both of them still sound asleep. Fury had put the rails of the bed up to prevent them from falling, and small blankets were draped over them, to keep them warm.
Phil looked at his children, rubbing their backs and relishing the feeling of having them close. Leo yawned and lifted his thumb to his mouth, sucking contentedly on the digit, while Jemma had a frown on her face as she slept, her brows furrowed in an expression that was a stark contrast to her usual happy face.
"Clint's out of surgery, he's going to be absolutely fine." Fury told Phil as Phil concentrated on his younger two children, and Phil nodded.
"Has there been an update on Audrey's condition?"
"I just got told her doctor was on the way up. You woke up at the right time."
"No thanks to your sedatives," Phil grumbled, although he knew why Fury had done it. If it had been any of the agents under Phil's command then he would have probably done the same thing.
The two men were silent until the door opened and a middle aged woman walked in, wearing hospital scrubs. She was carrying a file in her hands, and she took in the room wordlessly.
"Mr. Coulson, I assume?" she asked Phil.
"Call me Phil," Phil had replied.
"Phil, my name is Doctor Williams; I've been a part of the team who have been operating on your wife."
"How is she?"
"Phil, I'm very sorry to have to tell you this, but your wife passed away twenty minutes ago as a result of a large cranial bleed. We tried to relieve the pressure in her brain, but the damage from the trauma was too severe."
"She's...she's gone?" Phil asked, his voice cracking with emotion. Nick reached out and put a comforting hand on Coulson's shoulder as Dr. Williams nodded.
"I know it means little to you, but you have the deepest condolences of myself, and my team."
"She's gone...Audrey's dead." Phil choked out as Fury tightened his grip. Tears began building in Coulson's eyes, and he couldn't find the strength to hold back, his grief too raw to be controlled
"There is some other news I need to give you, Phil." Dr. Williams offered, and Phil turned tear filled eyes to the doctor.
"Prior to Mrs. Coulson's passing, we were able to successfully deliver her unborn child, a little baby girl, who is perfectly healthy. Her APGAR scores are great, and she's doing very well so far."
"Did you hear that, Phil?" Nick prompted when Phil's' only response was a tear rolling down his cheek and landing on Jemma's head.
Phil nodded, "A baby girl, and she's completely fine?"
Dr. Williams nodded, "she's perfect. If you like I can arrange for her to be brought up here. She's in the nursery at the moment."
Phil shifted, "I'll come and see her soon. I need to check on my son first."
Dr Williams nodded, "I'll tell them to expect you. If you have any questions don't hesitate to contact me."
With that, the woman left the room, and Phil began slowly getting out from beneath the covers. Fury gave him a change of clothes, and, with Fury watching the children, Phil ducked into the bathroom and had a quick shower, before he got dressed. When he came out of the bathroom a nurse was waiting for him, ready to take him first to recovery, where Clint was, and then on to the Newborn nursery. Nick would stay behind and watch Leo and Jemma, who he carefully moved back to their own hospital beds. Phil watched as Fury carefully tucked Leo in, knowing that both Leo and Jemma were heavy sleepers, and wouldn't stir, despite being moved around by Fury
Despite wanting to go and see his newborn daughter, Phil knew that he needed to see Clint first, to reassure himself that his eldest child was still alive. The nurse led him down one floor, and along several corridors, until they reached Clint's recovery room, two agents keeping guard at the door.
Phil's heart jumped in his chest when he walked into the room and lay eyes on Clint. The six year old lay on his back, an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. Phil was alarmed to see how pale Clint's face was, although the monitor and Clint's bedside indicated that Clint's pulse rate, blood pressure, and oxygen levels were within normal levels.
Phil sat heavily into the chair at Clint's bedside, taking his son's hand in his own. Clint was only six, and now he had no mother, a father that knew nothing about being a single parent, and three younger siblings that would, doubtlessly, be struggling to deal with the trauma that they had experienced. Clint himself would struggle, just as much as his siblings. He was only six; he was still so young, too young to face the prospect of life without his mother. Audrey wouldn't be there for Clint's first day of middle school, wouldn't be there to coo over Clint's first crush, wouldn't be there to drop him off for his first date, wouldn't be there to see him dressed up for prom, wouldn't be there to see him graduate high school, and wouldn't be there to send him off to college. She would miss all of that, and not just for Clint, but for Leo and Jemma and the new baby as well.
It was there, at Clint's bedside, that Phil broke down, his grief crashing down on him like the waves of a turbulent sea, dragging him down into the depths of despair
Phil didn't know how long he sat at his eldest son's bedside, grieving for his lost wife, but he knew at least an hour must have passed. Guilt welled up within him when he remembered the newest baby in his family, his little baby girl, removed from her dying mother's womb, the last piece of Audrey that he had left.
Squeezing Clint's hand gently, Phil kissed the top of his sleeping son's forehead, "I'll be back soon," he promised his son, before he stepped away, walking out of Clint's hospital room. The nurse who had been told to act as Phil's guide was talking to the agents guarding Clint's door.
"If he wakes up, can you let me know?" Phil asked one of the Agents, a man whom he had worked with many times before.
The agent nodded, "of course, Phil."
Phil gave a weak smile in response, although it felt forced, before the nurse led him through another maze of hallways and another trip in the elevator, to the maternity ward. Phil felt his throat tighten as he remembered the times when he'd been in maternity wards before, when Clint, Leo and Jemma had been born. Audrey had been at his side then, sitting with him when they had spent hours watching Clint in his humidicrib in the NICU, or laying in a bed with him and Clint as they cooed over Leo as he lay in his mother's arms, or looking up at him, an exhausted smile on her face, as he cradled Jemma the night she had been born.
This time Audrey wasn't there, and Phil was alone. He silently followed the nurse into the nursery, passing another two SHIELD agents standing guard along the way, before they weaved their way through the cribs, some empty, some holding sleeping babies, and dodged nurses and doctors as they cared for their small charges.
Phil's guide stopped beside a crib, identical to the others, a tag affixed to the headboard with 'baby girl Coulson' written on it. Taking a steadying breath, Phil looked down at the crib, his heart clenching even tighter when he saw the baby lying there, sound asleep, a coating of dark hair on the top of her head.
Unlike her older siblings, the baby didn't obviously favour one of her parents, instead taking a little bit from each of them. Phil was grateful for that; it was going to be hard enough for him with Jemma looking so much like her mother without his youngest child taking strongly after her mother as well.
"Do you want to have a hold?" Phil's guide asked, and Phil startled, reaching for his sidearm, even though he wasn't carrying it.
"Sorry," he apologised sheepishly, "would it be okay?"
The nurse smiled and nodded, "She's perfectly healthy, despite everything that has happened, I think she would like to have a cuddle with her dad."
Phil carefully reached into the cot, gathering the baby securely in his arms, before he straightened his back, cradling her close to his chest, tears gathering in his eyes.
"Hello, baby girl," he greeted softly, "I guess I'm your daddy. I'll always love you, baby girl, and...and your mommy will too. She's...she's gone, but she'll watch over you." Phil kissed the top of the baby's head, tears rolling down his cheeks, blurring his vision.
'You've got two big brothers and a big sister, and they can't wait to meet you. Clint and Leo and Jemma, they'll help look after you, and they'll love you too." Phil continued, speaking in a soft voice, thick with emotions, mostly his own grief at Audrey's death.
In Phil's arms, the baby stirred and curled into his chest, before she fell back asleep, her fingers curled around the edge of Phil's jacket. The nurse put her hand on Phil's shoulder and gently steered him into a small room attached to the main nursery, the walls soundproofed to prevent noise getting in. In the room was a couch and a comfortable armchair, as well as a coffee table, a plastic container of toys on the floor, and a TV tucked in the corner. Phil dropped into the arm chair still cradling his daughter as the nurse put a box of tissues beside him, within easy reach, and Phil grabbed one, wiping his eyes.
"I'll leave you alone now, let you get to know one another," the nurse said, leaving the room. Phil belatedly realised that he'd never asked her what her name was. It was too late to worry about it now, but Phil chastised himself for neglecting the good manners his parents had worked hard on giving him.
Phil sighed, cradling his newborn daughter in his arms, taking in her features. He lost track of the time that passed, giving the baby some of the breast milk that a nurse had brought in from the donated breast milk storage bank, a program that Audrey had donated breast milk to regularly when Clint, Leo and Jemma had been newborns. He changed the baby's nappy when she began to fuss, and he rocked her to sleep in his arms.
A gentle knock on the door to the little room drew Phil out of his silence, and the agent tore his gaze from his daughter and up at the person who had encroached on his bonding with his newest daughter.
"Nick," Phil greeted, taking in the sight of the feared director of SHIELD in the maternity wing of a hospital. In the past, it had always brought a grin to Phil's face, but now he couldn't bring himself to even lift the corners of his mouth.
"Phil," Fury nodded in reply to Phil's greeting.
"Are the other's alone?"
"Agents May and Romanoff are with Leo and Jemma. Both of them have woken up and Leo asked where you and Audrey were. I told him you were with Clint and the new baby, but I think he saw through me not mentioning Audrey."
"That's not surprising," Phil pointed out, "Leo's perceptive, he notices everything. Clint's the same. I'm going to have to tell them, and soon. Leo's going to be devastated, he and Audrey are...were really close."
"Leo and Jemma are asleep again, so you've got a little time before they need to learn the news. That...that wasn't why I came down here. I wanted to be the one who told you that Clint's starting to show signs of waking up. He's a fair way off being lucid, but the anaesthetic is starting to wear off," Fury quietly told his closest friend.
Phil nodded, knowing that he should tell Clint first. It would be awhile before Clint would be able to share a room with Leo and Jemma, and Phil didn't really want his middle two children seeing Clint until his eldest was awake, lucid and the colour in his face had returned to normal. They would be traumatised enough without seeing their big brother while he was so obviously struggling to recover from his injuries.
It didn't take much for Nick to persuade the nursery staff to allow Phil to take his newborn daughter with him when he left the ward. The baby had been recently fed and changed, so she seemed set for a nice long sleep, and Phil obviously didn't want to let this last piece of his wife go, so Phil and Nick, with Phil cradling the baby, headed up to the room where Clint lay, sleeping. Once again, Phil settled into the comfortable padded chair at Clint's bedside, the baby settled in the crook of one arm, and leaving Phil's other arm free to reach out and hold Clint's hand.
Phil hadn't been there for long, twenty minutes maximum, when Clint began to stir, the hand that Phil was holding moving on the blankets, Clint's fingers flexing as he returned to consciousness.
"Clint," Phil called softly, "Come on buddy, wake up. There's someone here who wants to meet you. You need to wake up for me, okay buddy. Do you think you can open your eyes for me?"
Clint moaned sleepily, his eyes fluttering open, his lashes brushing against the oxygen mask over his nose and mouth.
"Dad?" he croaked out, his eyes blearily focusing on Phil.
"Hey buddy, how do you feel?"
"Hurts," Clint frowned, "where's mom?"
Phil bit his lip, "What do you remember?" he asked cautiously.
"The car, we were going to the safe house, but then we hit...another car, and we were spinning out and I leaned over Jemma's car seat and Agent Avery leaned over us and told me to shut my eyes, and...and I don't remember anymore. Did we crash?"
"Yeah, buddy, the car crashed. Leo and Jemma are okay, they're sleeping upstairs. You did a great job protecting Jemma, and I'm very proud of you, she might have gotten hurt badly if you hadn't protected her like that."
"Is mom with them?" Clint asked, and Phil let out a heavy sigh.
"No, buddy, she's not. I need to tell you something, Clint, and it's not good news."
Clint's eyes welled with tears, and Phil knew that his eldest had realised what had happened.
"Mommy?" Clint asked, his voice hitching in a loud sob.
"She hit her head really hard in the accident, and it caused a bleed in her brain. The doctors tried everything they could, but...but she's gone, Clint. She died."
Clint burst into tears, and Phil got to his feet, Nick stepping forward from his position at the door, Carefully taking the baby from Phil's arms so Phil could focus on comforting his eldest child. Clint curled into Phil's chest, crying and clinging onto the material of Phil's shirt. Phil gently rocked, his eyes glancing to the monitors that Clint was attached to, wincing as Clint's sobs and cries turned into coughs.
"Shh, easy," Phil soothed, "you're hurt too, you need to calm down or you might get even more hurt."
A couple of nurses hurried in and noted the figures being displayed. One of them hurried off to fetch a doctor, while the others tried to help Phil calm Clint. Clint, however, sobbed and clung to Phil.
"Sir, I'm afraid if he keeps this up we'll have to sedate him, he might cause further damage to his lungs," one of the nurses told Phil, who shook his head.
"No, not yet. Nick, can you come here for a moment?"
"Nick, who had withdrawn to his spot by the door, approached, and Clint's sob's broke off when he saw the other man, his eyes widening when he saw the tiny swaddled bundle his Uncle Nick was holding.
"I told you there was someone who wanted to meet you. Do you want to say hello to your new baby sister?" Phil asked Clint gently. Clint swallowed and nodded, his breathing calming down, although it was still hitching as tears continued to roll down Clint's cheeks. Nick passed the baby to Phil, who held her so that Clint, now leaning against his father, could see.
"Does she have a name?" Clint asked, his voice hoarse and scratchy. One of the nurses offered him a paper cup with some water in it, and Clint sipped at it until it was empty, and his oxygen mask was back in place, fogging up with every breath he let out.
"No, not yet." Phil admitted. He and Audrey hadn't settled on a name for their newest baby, although Audrey had been adamant about using the name Phillipa as a middle name if it was a girl. Phil hadn't had the heart to argue, and since Audrey had reasoned that she and Jemma shared a middle name, and that it was Phil's turn to pass a name on, and since he didn't have a middle name, it was going to have to be his first name, there didn't seem to be a way around it. Phil wasn't going to turn his back on Audrey's wishes, especially not now.
"We...we'd decided on Phillipa for a middle name, but we hadn't decided on a first name."
Clint frowned and looked down at the baby, gently running his finger along her cheek. The baby stirred at the touch, opening her eyes and looking up at her father and brother, her eyes unfocused as she yawned, flexing her little fingers.
"What about Skye?" Clint asked, and Phil blinked at the suggestion. Skye wasn't a name that had come up before during any of Audrey's previous pregnancies, and he wasn't even sure where Clint had heard it. None of his classmates had that name.
"Where did you get Skye from, Clint?" Fury asked.
"Mommy's in heaven, which is in the sky. She's gonna be watching over us from there, and she needs to watch over the baby the most because she's so little." Clint reasoned, and Phil's eyes filled with tears as he kissed the top of Clint's head.
"Skye is a perfect name, Clint. Your mommy would love it. Skye Phillipa Coulson, it suits her."
Clint nestled closer to Phil, his eyes drooping a little as the residual anaesthetic in his bloodstream began to pull him into the arms of sleep.
"It's okay, Clint," Phil promised, "It might not feel like it, but we'll be okay. I'll look after you. You and Leo and Jemma and Skye. You guys are my world, and nothing will ever happen to you, not if there is anything I can do about it."
Realistically, Phil knew that he shouldn't make promises like that to Clint, not when the six year old had just learned that his mother was dead, but, against the odds, he managed to keep his promise, through the incident at the Stark Expo, to a figure from Norse mythology literally crash landing in the middle of the desert in New Mexico, both only a few months after Skye was born, to the army of aliens that invaded New York a few years later.
It was over four years before Phil's promise to his son was broken, and nothing could have ever prepared him for the situation that would lead to it happening.