Not Meant To Be
Warnings: Well, it's a Gaara - Naruto fic, angst? Self-edited. Implied Naruto + Sasuke, not glorified though
Notes: Another of those fics I wrote a long time ago, and just recently decided to upload. Feedback is love? I'm especially fond of criticism.
...
Naruto and Sasuke have been fighting again, but it's not the 'fist into head', 'knuckles into mouth' type of fight (they have those too, of course, Naruto always bearing traces of those fights – a black eye or a swollen cheek-).
But no, this is the sort of fight that has Naruto smiling stiffly, but that smile fades as soon as others leave the room. And then, he's just looking grim, sad and defeated. He doesn't say a thing, just mutters a 'fucking hell that bastard' under his breath once. It's not like he needs to: his eyes say 'why do I love him so much' and 'why do I keep going back—'.
And Gaara is grateful for that honesty.
He knows he's the only person who'll ever see Naruto like this.
...
The days when Gaara could not fall asleep, due to a monster being locked inside of him, have long since faded, but he still can't sleep. Can't because Naruto is right at his side, his arm heavy around Gaara's waist.
(He asked to sleep here, said he couldn't be alone tonight.)
But Gaara doesn't push him away, doesn't because this is the closest thing he'll have to really being with Naruto.
When he closes his eyes, Gaara dreams.
...
Gaara doesn't dream of hot breath tickling against his cheek (he does on other nights) nor dream of warm lips kissing the Kanji etched on his forehead, but –
He dreams of Naruto, laughing openly at him, his eyes saying 'I need you' and 'you're everything to me'.
In his dreams, Naruto looks the same way at Gaara as he looks at him.
...
On the next morning, Naruto is smiling brightly again, his eyes full of hope. He's already forgotten about his fight with Sasuke, ready to forgive the other man.
"Sasuke was just in a bad mood," he says, self-reproach evident in his tone, "I really should stop expecting him to open up to me." He sounds a bit regretful at that, as if it's not what he expected in a relationship.
"Maybe, he will open up to you one day." Gaara feels he owes Naruto this, the reassurance that things might change for the better. Didn't Naruto give him so much?
And, even if he doesn't like Sasuke a lot (he's a brat and an idiot), Gaara says, because he knows it's the truth, "He loves you, after all."
Naruto shakes his head. "You know, sometimes I ask myself it if it's really the sort of love I should be – ah, forget it."
And Gaara does, or at least pretends to, but his heart doesn't.
...
Naruto is already at the borders of Suna, smiling brightly though a bit sadly too. "I'll miss you, Gaara. Wish I could see you more often."
(Gaara, privately, thinks his heart coudln't stand it if Naruto was here more often, but he doesn't say anything, just nods, smiling gently.)
"I'll miss you too, Naruto. A lot." And that's the truth, of course. "Take care."
Naruto nods at that, turning around, his cape fluttering behind him as he starts to leave.
And Gaara, an impulse awakening in him that is not part of the demon he was once (because it's only human to want, to desire), fights back the urge to say "don't go, Naruto, don't go."
Don't go back to him, he wants to say.
But he doesn't.
Some things are just not meant to be.
...