Trump Card
(Takes place immediately after "Something Borrowed, Something Blew Up". Abigail knows that she has lost Marshall but she can tell him something that will get him back. Will she?)
Marshall Mann yawned uncontrollably as he pulled into the parking lot of his apartment complex. What a day. Assassins, bombs, explosions and Mary going into labor. To top it all off he had automatically driven more than halfway towards his old apartment before coming to his senses and turning around to go to the one he now shared with Detective Abigail Chaffee.
He smiled to himself thinking about Abigail. Then he frowned. Where had she gone? After the courthouse attack they had rushed home, cleaned up and changed clothes. She had looked great in her flowery dress and heels; so different from her normal garb of slacks and athletic shoes. When Mary had gone into labor at the site of the aborted wedding he had flipped his phone to her and she had called for an ambulance. But he hadn't seen her since he had got in that ambulance with Mary. He thought she might have come to the hospital but she had never showed. When he left he had been forced to bum a ride back to the office and his car.
He pulled into one of the two reserved parking places for their apartment. And Abigail's unmarked unit was in the other. Backed in, he noticed. That was unusual. Abigail's standard method was to pull straight in at a speed that made his knuckles whiten as he grabbed the dashboard before she slammed on the brakes at the last second, all the while keeping up a light conversation with him.
Normally he took the stairs up to the third floor two at a time. Tonight he trudged one by one and wondered why they hadn't settled on a first floor apartment. The door was ajar, something that normally would have roused his instincts but before they kicked in he caught a glimpse of Abigail through the open door. She seemed alright. But when he came through the door he realized that things were anything but alright.
"What's this?" he indicated the stack of suitcases and boxes beside the now wide open door.
"Damn," the female detective said as she checked her watch. "I had thought I'd be finished before you got here. How's Mary?"
"Resting comfortably. It appears she was experiencing Braxton-Hicks contractions. Stronger ones than usual but still not full labor. However they're keeping her overnight for observation. She was asleep when I left."
"Good. I'm glad she's alright."
"Never mind that right now. Let me repeat. What's all this?"
"Marshall Mann you are one of if not THE smartest men I have ever known. Surely you can tell."
"You're leaving?"
"Give the man a gold star."
"Why?" he said simply.
"Because I love you."
Marshall ran his fingers through his hair. "I must admit that of all the possible answers that cascaded through my mind just now that wasn't one I considered. Could you explain that a little further? Sometimes I'm a little slow on the uptake because I don't see how you loving me is a reason to leave."
"Because although you care for me you don't love me. Not the way you do Mary."
"If this is about what happened during the attack at the courthouse again you told me you got it."
Abigail smiled sadly and the smile tugged at his heartstrings.
"I DO get it Marshall. It's just that for some unknown reason you don't." She moved close enough to him to touch his cheek with her fingers. "Mary will always be the most important person in your life. She will always be the first one in your thoughts. And yes, you'll always throw yourself on top of her. You'll always rush to her when she needs you. You'll always sit by her bed in the hospital. I get that. It's time that you stopped fooling yourself. You know she's the woman you love."
"Abigail..."
"Hush. It's okay." She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. "We had a pretty good run and I gave it my best shot. You don't need to worry about me. I'll be alright. You need to put your energy into Mary and making the two of you become more than just partners and best friends."
Unable to think of a thing to say Marshall stood quietly as Abigail finished carrying her stuff to the car. He had automatically started to help her but a shake of her head told him that she needed to do it by herself. She picked up the last suitcase and stood in the doorway looking at him. Twice she opened her mouth to say something and twice she closed it without speaking. Finally her shoulders slumped, she turned away and then she was gone. He continued to stand there until he heard her car start up and pull out of the parking lot.
It wasn't until Abigail was safely around the corner and out of sight that she pulled over, stopped the car and buried her head in her hands. After sitting there for a minute she dropped her hands to her lap with a sigh and leaned back in the seat. Her eyes focused on the inside roof of her car but she didn't see it.
Why oh WHY hadn't she told him? She was going to tell him when he walked in the door. She was going to tell him more than once during their brief goodbye. And she certainly was going to tell him when she walked out the door. And she couldn't.
Didn't he have a right to know? Never mind Mary pregnant with her ex-husband's baby shouldn't she have told him that she was pregnant too? That there was a little Marshall or Abigail forming inside her? That he was going to be a father, not just an honorary uncle?
No of course she couldn't. Because Marshall was a man of honor. He would have "done the right thing". He would have proposed and she would have accepted and she would have been as happy as she had dreamed of being since she first met him and was captivated forever by him.
But it wouldn't have been fair. Not to him, not to her and most of all not to their child. At best he would always have that reserved corner of his heart that belonged to another woman that would always split him in two. And ever since she had fallen for him, midway though their first date, all she wanted was to make him happy. That would not be the way to do it.
"But what about me?" she demanded out loud to no one and everyone. "Don't I deserve to be happy too?"
That wouldn't have been possible either. And the worst might have come to pass. Marshall might believe that she had done this deliberately, connived to trap him by getting pregnant. It wasn't true; it had just been that one tenth of one percent that birth control pills failed. He might have believed her. For a while. But there would always be that nagging seed of doubt and she couldn't blame him for that.
No, she had a trump card that would have swept the whole board clean and she couldn't play it. Too bad. He would have made an incredible father. Maybe one day...
Abigail shook her head. Best not to go there. No false hopes and dreams anymore. She started her car and shifted into drive. Her mind turned to the practical matters of finding another position somewhere well away from Albuquerque. Marshall wouldn't suspect anything nor would anyone else. It would seem perfectly natural for her to go back to Texas after their breakup. She made a mental note that the most important thing would be to find a department that would transfer her health insurance from here. She was going to need it.
She hoped that this would make Marshall finally face up to his feelings for Mary and for goodness sake TELL her. She wanted him to be happy. After all, she smiled sadly once more as she drove to wherever her new life might lead her, that's what you want for someone you love.
(The End)
(*Sigh* Mary and Marshall are fated to be together I know but I can't help it. I LIKE Abigail. She makes Marshall happy. It will be interesting to see what happens next season since Rachel Boston will be added to the main cast for the season, short as that season will be.)