Title: The Fundamental Things
Author: Heaven_Sends/Sarah/whatever
Pairing: GSR
Rating: R, but I'm warning you it's not very good…
Disclaimer: I don't own any of this stuff.
Summary: It's a first time story. Again. When will it end?
A/N: It's a Blockbuster Ficathon entry that is like way early. Also, thanks to the most awesome beta, anneb9900, who did this with zero notice because I am so selfish.
Gil Grissom had built his life on constants.
His job. His bugs. The sun rising in the east and setting in the west. In the past, he'd never had much time for relationships. He just didn't see the point. He followed the evidence for a living, and where exactly was the evidence of love? In the end, a kiss was just a kiss, like the song said, so the fundamental things applied. That probably wasn't what the guy meant, but it was true, and the number of homicides and domestic abuse cases coming across his desk each week certainly didn't make him want to believe in something like love.
That was until everything changed.
After years of resisting, of pretending not to care but caring nonetheless, he fell into bed with one Sara Sidle. And really, it didn't matter so much how they got there. What mattered was that when he kissed her lips and her neck and her lips again, she kissed him back. And suddenly the fundamental things didn't apply anymore. Not in the least.
……
They were moving too fast, he realized, but he couldn't seem to slow them down. All at once it wasn't just their lips coming together but their hands and bodies, too. It took every ounce of Grissom's willpower to tear himself away. He didn't want their first time to be like this. Sara deserved better than a quick roll in the hay, a five-minute resolution to a five-year longing.
It should be slow, he thought, and reverent. So he took her hand in his and kissed it softly, brushing his lips along the small, precise crest of each knuckle, until she thought she might cry from the tenderness of it. Then he leaned in and kissed her again, first on the cheek and then on the lips with an intensity that shocked them both. Of course she kissed him back.
And when the time came he undressed her slowly, carefully. He stared at her nude body in the dim light of the bedroom. Her bedroom. In her apartment. In his wildest dreams he wouldn't have conceived this.
God, she was so beautiful. And so young. Dear God, so young… He told himself to stop it, that she'd made it clear the 'age thing' wasn't allowed in her bedroom. But it was hard to let it go, especially as he stared at the gloriously smooth expanse of her skin before him.
……
It was more than a bit overwhelming, and Grissom wasn't at all sure what to do next. He was at a loss for words, but it didn't seem to matter as Sara's hands eagerly roamed over him. His clothes met hers in a heap on the floor.
He wanted this, wanted her, and yet when she reached for him once again, he hesitated. The sensation of another person's hands, Sara's hands, touching him so intimately caught him off guard. Thoughts he'd been trying to push away swirled mercilessly in his head. How long had it been since he'd done this? He couldn't remember. Years? A decade maybe? Or maybe it was more like never, because he'd never been in love before.
Shit. Where did that come from?
He wanted to take it back, erase it from his consciousness. But he couldn't. I love this woman, he thought. It wasn't the right time to say it, but it felt good to allow himself to think it as he made love to her.
They lay together side by side, reveling in the experience of each other's bodies, touching, tasting, teasing. It felt so new and yet so familiar at the same time. I love this woman, he thought again.
……
In the beginning Grissom said nothing, not wanting to break the spell. Sara, though, whispered soft words of encouragement as he explored her body for the first time. After a while, he tentatively added his own murmurs of awe and affection.
Minutes passed and Sara's voice became ragged as she pulled him to her once again. Grissom knew this was it. His eyes searched her face for some sort of reassurance, some sign or signal. What he found there was love.
They both gasped as their bodies joined for the first time. It felt amazing and perfect, and it was frantic and messy. And for all of Grissom's worrying it probably was over in five minutes, as she cried out, stiffening in his embrace, and his quiet climax followed soon after.
Still joined she clung to him, and to her surprise, he clung back. For long minutes they listened to nothing but each other's labored breathing and eventually, five or so years overdue, quiet words of love.
Then for once, Grissom didn't want to go to work. He forgot to feed his cockroaches. And he didn't give a damn about where the sun was. He just wanted to lie on these sheets that needed changing with his arm around Sara's shoulder and her head on his chest for the rest of his life.
……
So when all the constants slipped away on that Sunday afternoon, he built his life around her instead.