I wasn't always second place.

I wasn't always behind Near.

Before Near entered the orphanage, and after A and B disappeared, I was first. It was me.

Mello.

It should have stayed that way, too. I study harder than everyone else, and I'm more dedicated. I do everything I can to be the best I can, but I still fall short to the effortless actions of Near.

I can feel him mocking me. Waiting for me to catch up, just to skip ahead and secure his spot as first. I know this game all too well.

He thinks it's funny, and I think it's humiliating. Near has offered to work together, but I don't work like that. Not with him.

I could never work with him.

He's not emotionless, but he's not expressive enough for me. Watching him keep a straight face or level head under circumstances that make me explode- no, I don't actually explode, others just describe my anger as such- it pisses me off.

I'm not even that emotional to begin with, I'm just passionate. I'm passionate about my knowledge, and I'm proud of it. So, I might get a little heated up at times, and my frustration can lead to my small outbursts, but I know Near is more emotional than me.

I see his victorious little smirks, I see his sarcastic looks, his brief bouts of anger that slip away only seconds later-

I see it.

But the others don't. They see the first, they see the placid little boy who effortlessly maintains himself at the top. They don't see me.

They don't see the second, they see a sporty boy with 'feminine' looks. They see a violent blond who wants to destroy everything in his way.

But they're all wrong.

Near isn't emotionless and I'm not overflowing with the stuff, either.

The brats don't see it. They're not smart enough to stop looking with their eyes and start looking with their brains. That won't happen.

They'll never see us for what we really are.

Which is why I respect Near, and consider him my rival. He is by no means my enemy.

We have a common goal, to succeed L, and we share the goal, but we'll never really share it. We'll never share L's title, and we'll never both be in the light of glory.

I'll always be second to him, but if I sit back and let it happen, people will see me as weak. I'm not weak.

I'll face my challenges head on as they come. I won't let my second place get me down.

I'm first in the areas he can't be- I'm better with physical stunts, and, hey, look at me, I'm much more attractive than him.

But what does that matter when you're going for a job where you use your brains almost the entire time? Brawns don't matter when you're examining more than a hundred screens at once. Brawns don't matter when you're solving a puzzle. Brawns don't matter when you're talking behind a screen.

What does matter?

Brains.

But it doesn't mean that I don't matter.

I'm important no matter what people see me as. Mello, second, anger issues-boy, to hell with it all.

Mihael Keehl doesn't back down from challenges. I don't back down from challenges.

I'll continue trying to beat Near until the bitter end. I'll show everyone that I'm not just second, and that I'm not just another 'failure'.

I'll fight on until I can't fight any longer. Even then, I'll fight.

I can make it.

Near, smirk all you want, I know you love that. I know you love showing your emotions when only I can see it, or when the others won't notice. And you know what? That's great.

I don't care if you think it's funny because, hell, if you want people to stereotype you as an emotionless twat, I might as well let you do it. If they want to stereotype me as someone constantly PMSing, fine, it's not hurting me.

We'll make fools of each other, and it'll look like fun, but we both know it's not just our game. It's our life. We're racing and racing and racing to see who can be the best in the shortest time, and we'll keep racing and racing and racing until there's not a second left.

Who will make it to the finish line first, Near?

I'll meet you there.