Author's Note: So, when I was writing the Beautiful Life Christmas chapter, I got all of these Annie's second Christmas feelings, and wanted to post a little fluffy one shot for the holiday! This takes place in December 2020, six months after the end of Finding the Way Back.
It may be such a cliche thing to say, but on the second Sunday of December, as I drove up the New York State Thruway with my wife in the passenger seat of the car and our eighteen-month-old daughter pointing out and identifying objects from behind me (tee, Mama, caw, Mamí, tee, tuck, tee), it really hit me how there really is just something about Christmastime that makes the world seem so much more magical. Although it wasn't Annalise's first Christmas, somehow, it felt like it was. Like, after the year our little family had made it through, we were finally settling into the life we were meant to have. The previous year, we'd sandwiched the holiday season between emotional breakdowns, major revelations and a court case that shaped the rest of our lives, but this year, as one of the hardest year of my life, drew to a close, the only emotions I was feeling were peace and a sense of immense happiness.
I glanced back at Annie in the rearview mirror, and she was in all her beautiful glory, smiling wide with her five teeth, her purple coat buttoned up to her chin and her wispy blonde hair twisted up in Cindy Lou Who-esque pigtails that stuck straight up on the top of her head. Probably sensing the contented smile on my face, Brittany lifted up my hand that rested on her thigh and brought it up to her lips, pressing them against the inside of my wrist. We didn't need to exchange words to express our mutual feelings of happiness, smiles and wrist kisses were more than enough. As she used her free hand to change radio stations from the static that had finally overtaken Z-100, our eyes met when she found another that came in clearly, and we shared a laugh over how fitting the song that played was before we both burst out singing.
Oh, my love we've had our share of tears
Oh, my friend we've had our hopes and fears
Oh, my friend it's been a long hard year
But now it's Christmas
Yes it's Christmas
Thank God it's Christmas
Quite possibly, the best part of the entire situation was that from the backseat, Annie shrieked incoherently along with us, her own version of singing, and opened and closed her tiny hands as if she were doing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, something that she did (very adorably, if I do say so myself) every time either Brittany or I opened our mouths to sing. Something about it made my heart feel light, probably lighter than it had in a long time, even before there were trees, presents, twinkling lights and Santa Claus. It truly felt like Christmas again, not because of anything we could buy, or any song we could sing, but because it was the three of us together, happy, content and safe.
Of course, that non-commercial, all we need is love bliss lasted only another forty-five minutes, until we pulled up into the packed dirt parking lot of the oh so creatively named Christmas Tree Farm in central Westchester County. If it hadn't been for the absolutely entranced looks on Brittany and Annie's faces, I totally would have rolled my eyes at the major cheese factor of the scene in front of us. Basically, it looked like the North Pole threw up on a candy cane and gumdrop forest, and then robbed all of the inflatable figures and gaudy lights from Home Depot. Ridiculous didn't even begin to describe what appeared in front of us. It was completely over the top, and yet didn't surprise me in the slightest, considering who chose it (here's a hint, it starts with a B and rhymes with Merry). As I slung the diaper bag over my shoulder, Brittany unbuckled Annie from the carseat, and gave myself a moment to take in her wide eyed wonder.
"Lies! Lies!" She cheered, her little body vibrating with excitement.
"That's right, baby girl." Brittany cooed, kissing the top of her head. "Christmas lights."
"'Smas lies!." Annie echoed, and the laugher that followed rang through the entire parking lot.
"Our smart girl." I praised, lacing my fingers with Brittany's after she'd settled Annie on her hip. "Now let's go find Uncle Finn and Aunt Rachel so we can pick out your tree."
As we walked down Gumdrop Lane (seriously), we took in all of the other families who were reveling in the excitement of the season. Annie was beside herself, wanting to reach out and touch everything she passed, to the point where she was all but thrashing in Brittany's arms. More than anything, she loved the twinkling of the lights, and we paused countless times before we eventually sat down on a bench directly across from the biggest lit tree and scanned the crowd for Finn and Rachel. Brittany set Annie down on her feet in between her legs, and though she had the ability to stand on her own, she still held on to her Mama's thighs for dear life.
"They're late, they're late, for a very important date." Brittany singsonged, causing Annie to giggle.
"Well if Mumbles had to waddle all the way from the car, we'll be waiting here awhile."
"You know, it's really super cute that you just used Happy Feet for an insult." She teased, and I sucked my teeth at her. "I'm really surprised she wanted to do this though, when we were over there last week, she could hardly get up off the couch."
"I'm not." I laughed, shaking my head. "You know Rachel, she hasn't been on stage since January, and she thinks her fans are going to forget about her, so she wants to be seen doing normal people things. I'm pretty sure her current dream is to have her picture in US Weekly's Stars: They're Just Like Us section."
"Oh God, Santana, you and your trashy magazines." Brittany shook her head, then shifted Annie over to my lap so she could jump up and wave her arms as our friends approached us. Immediately, I burst out laughing as I saw Rachel wearing a belted red coat and her black snowboots.
"Look, Annie!" I took her hand in mine and pointed over to them. "Santa got one of his elves to fill in for him this year!"
"I heard that, Santana." Rachel huffed, removing one of her hands from her lower back to rest on her hip.
"You made it entirely too easy for me in that outfit. All you're missing is the hat and it would be even more perfect than your Munchkin costume."
"I'm glad you think that I exist solely for your amusement." She rolled her eyes and Finn lifted Annie out of my arms.
"Be nice to her, honey." Britt whispered in my ear, once our friends were sufficiently distracted with the baby. "You know she's beyond sensitive at this point, and just ready to get that baby out of her."
"Lucky for her it's almost Christmas then." I smirked, and Brittany swatted me playfully before I stole a kiss from her. "Okay, are we ready to get trees, or what?"
"Tees, Finn!" Annie wrapped her arms tightly around her godfather, and he smiled down at her affectionately.
"And lots of them, little lady." He promised her.
It was a long procedure, waiting in line to get a sled, an axe and a map of where each type of trees grow, and the semi-uphill walk in the direction of the trees was even longer. I actually felt terrible for Rachel, trying to waddle that distance in the slippery snow, but luckily for her, once we'd made it about halfway to where the Fraser Firs were, her ever attentive husband insisted on pulling her the rest of the way on the sled. Trying her hardest not to look like a complete fool, she insisted on taking Annie in her lap, and our little girl nestled herself immediately against her belly. Once we were sure Annie wouldn't put up a fuss, Brittany and I fell a few paces behind them, hands swinging together between us. Neither of us could help but laugh, watching Finn look more in his element than he ever truly did in the city, hunting coat and cap on, axe slung over his shoulder and dragging the sled behind him like he was a happier version of Charlie Brown, all grown up.
"Thanks for agreeing to come today." Brittany said softly, turning to face me and pressing a hard kiss on my lips.
"Glad to." I smiled against her mouth. "I know you wanted to go to a real farm last year, instead of buying our tree from outside the Korean deli, so I'm happy we're making it happen this year."
"Me too. I'm happy for all the things we're making happen, you know?" She scrunched up her nose, and I kissed the tip of it.
"I do." I pulled her into a tight hug, trying to convey just how strongly I felt about everything we'd been through together, and how excited I was that once the year was over, my superstitious mind would finally allow me to put the darkest era of my life completely behind me.
We started walking again, picking up the pace since we'd fallen pretty far behind, even with Finn tugging the heavy sled. I took a minute to take in our surroundings, and since we had gone far enough away from the entrance, things had begun to look much more like I'd expected of a tree farm. Up in the distance, there was row upon row of evergreens, the snow from the previous night coating the branches and making it look like one of those old-timey paintings of the country in the winter. The place was so big that there were no other people in sight, and it kind if felt like we were in our own little world. Having grown so accustomed to the constant noise of the city, the utter quiet surprised me. Somewhere far off, I heard people calling back and forth to one another, and I heard peals of my daughter's laugher from up ahead, and there was no background noise to taint that. Not realizing that I'd been caught up in my own head, I snapped out of it just in time to see Brittany bend down and pick up a handful of snow, a mischievous glint in her eyes.
"Brittany Susan Lopez-Pierce, don't you dare!"
"Don't I dare what?" She feigned innocence.
"Throw that snow at me!"
"I'm not going to throw it at you, Santana." Brittany smiled devilishly,
"Right, and we just met yesterday." I laughed, not letting my eyes leave the snow in her hands.
"I promise I'm not going to throw it at you." She gave me her most solemn look and held out her pinky. Cautiously, I squeezed hers with mine, knowing that she wouldn't break a promise, but also knowing that she was up to something.
"So what are you going to do with it?"
"Give me a hug and I'll tell you."
"Nope, uh-uh, no way!"
"You're not going to hug me?" She gasped, then immediately lunged at me, wrapping her arms tightly around my body so I couldn't escape. "That's not very nice, you know."
"It's not very nice doing something with snow." I pouted, and she quickly kissed it away.
"But you don't even know what I was going to do."
"No, but I can see in your eyes when you're up to something." I laughed, and before I could say anything else, her hands slithered their way up my back and she tugged at the collar of my coat, quickly releasing the snow inside and causing me to shriek as the ice cold snow hit my skin. "Brittany! You promised!"
"Nope, I promised I wouldn't throw it at you. I definitely didn't throw it." She smirked as I wriggled my way out of her arms to gather some snow of my own.
Brittany took off running, her laugher ringing through the open air, and I was quick to follow. Before I knew it, we'd launched into a full fledged snowball fight. Very quickly, we were both completely covered in white powder, and neither of us could put an end to our fit of giggles. There had always been something for me about Brittany and snow, and seeing my wife like that just made me want to kiss her. Giving her my own sly grin, I ran towards her, jumping into her arms and wrapping my legs around her waist. While she normally would have caught me without a hitch, the wet snow on the ground caused her to slip, and the two of us tumbled down to the ground all tangled up in each other, still laughing. Realizing that I had the upper hand, with her pinned beneath me, I reached out and picked up some more snow, holding it dangerously close to her face.
"I think-" I breathed, my voice hoarser than I'd expected as she wriggled beneath me and I felt her heart beat against mine, even through all of our clothes. "That you need to say you're sorry."
"Oh do you?" She quirked an eyebrow, her eyes twinkling. "But what if I told you that I wasn't sorry?"
"Well then I'd say that everyone is mistaken when they say you're the nice one."
"But you see, the thing is, if I hadn't put snow down your jacket, I wouldn't be laying in the snow with my hot wife in my arms, about one second from kissing her. So how could I be sorry for that?" She shrugged, and I got that tingly feeling inside that always came when she used her logic to say something strangely sweet. "I am sorry if I got you really cold though."
Rather than answer her, I simply closed the gap between our lips and kissed her sweetly, momentarily forgetting that it was freezing, we were both covered in snow, and we probably needed to get up before Finn and Rachel took our baby and left without us. We probably would have forgotten for even longer, but the sound of Rachel clearing her throat brought us back to reality. Rolling off of Britt, I stood up, offering her a hand and after I pulled her up, I straightened her hat and she dusted the snow out of my hair.
"Are you two enjoying scarring all the children as you make out in the snow?" She asked, rolling her eyes at me for the second time in an hour. Pregnant Rachel was definitely Bitchy McHormones, but I actually found it to be one if her funniest personalities.
"We were far from making out. And by children, do you mean our child?" I laughed, sort of taunting her. "Because you do know that Jesus 2.0 can't see yet, right?""
"Oh my God, Santana. Stop calling him that!" She rubbed her belly, and I could hear Finn try to stifle a chuckle as he handed Annie back to me and I nuzzled her nose.
"Aunt Rachel is being silly, mija." I stage whispered. "She knows we say it because we love her and the new baby, right?"
"Lub you!" Annie giggled, pointing at me, and I tickled her belly.
"I love you too, my beautiful girl. What do you say, should we stop fooling around and go find our tree?"
"Tee! Tee! Tee!" She chanted, pointing at the cluster of them in front of us.
"You heard the boss." Finn grinned. "Time to go."
Walking through the trees, I let Brittany decide which she wanted to get. When I was growing up, we'd always had a fake tree, but not the Pierces. I'd actually been with them once to cut down their tree, and my in-laws seriously had a needle-to-branch ratio they followed and a snap test to determine how well the ornaments would hold. We walked around for a good half hour, Finn and Rachel having cut down a small one, since it would be less clean up to deal with when they had a newborn in the house, before Britt finally had her sights set on a tree that was slightly taller than her.
"What do you think of this one, Santana?" She asked, looking it up and down.
"It's great." I smiled. "What do you think, Annie? Do you want this to be our tree?"
"Annie tee!" She clapped her hands, and I got that same warm feeling I did every single time I watched her fully understand something one of us was asking.
"That settles it!" Brittany leaned over and kissed Annie's cheeks. "Good call, baby girl."
"Finn!" I called out, looking over to where he had his arms around Rachel and was looking down at her belly, speaking softly. As much as I ribbed the two of them, I was really so unbelievably happy for them, and so unbelievably happy that they'd asked me to be the baby's godmother, and hadn't even revoked the request after my incessant teasing. "Can you cut this one down for us?"
"Sure, and just in time, because it's starting to get really cold out here." He walked over to us with the axe and assessed the tree. "Nice one."
"Wait, before you cut it. I don't know that first thing about chopping down trees, but I feel like one if us should make the first cut. You know, start a tradition or something?" Brittany looked at me hopefully, a gigantic grin in her face.
"Go ahead, babe, that's all you! But please, be careful."
Even though she'd watched her father do it dozens of times, I was still so incredibly nervous for Britt to take her own stab (literally) at chopping down an evergreen tree. Before she even took the axe in her hands, Finn spend several minutes explaining to her exactly how to do it. I sent him a grateful smile, and he nodded in understanding, knowing the last thing any of us wanted to taint our hopeful, amazingly Merry Christmas was some weird tree chopping related injury. When Finn finally handed her the axe, I backed up several feet with Annie (not because I didn't trust my wife implicitly-unless she had snow in her hands-but because it was my natural maternal instinct to keep my daughter away from sharp objects) and held my breath. Once Britt took the swing, and the blade made contact with the trunk. I let a stream of air out of my lungs and felt a pinch of arousal at how incredibly sexy she looked being all outdoorsy.
"Whoa Britt." I sighed happily, and her eyes danced as she looked over at me. "I didn't know I was into the whole lumberjack thing, but that was seriously hot."
"I prefer lumber-Jacqueline, thank you very much." She winked. "Should I take another swing?"
"One time was hot, two times might give me a heart attack." I laughed, and she handed the axe back to Finn, before coming over to steal the kiss she'd rightfully earned. "Thanks for helping cut down our tree."
"You're very welcome."
"Noooooooooooo!" Annie shrieked out, interrupting the moment, and I gasped at her panic as she pointed at the ground where Finn's efforts had left the tree. "Tee boke!"
"Oh, no, no, no, sweetheart." Britt soothed as tears sprung to Annie's eyes. "It's okay, it's okay. The tree is okay."
"Tee boke!" She cried harder, and Finn nearly dove to the ground to set it back upright.
"Look, Annie. It just fell down for a minute, but I fixed it." He promised, clearly feeling terrible for contributing to her anguish. "I'm so sorry that I scared you, but it's all better now."
Annie looked between the tree and Finn skeptically, the tears in her eyes still not completely dry. It was no secret to any of us that the beautiful little girl in my arms took things very much to heart, something that surprised me immensely, considering how old she was, but she was absolutely worried about the tree, and my own heart clenched at how sensitive she was. Slowly, I walked with her over to where her uncle stood, and gently, I reached out my hand to touch the tree, softly encouraging her to do the same.
"See, mi amor? Uncle Finn fixed it right up, and we're going to take it to our house." I whispered, kissing reassurances into her hair.
"Tank you Finn" She sniffled, the last residual tears falling from her eyes. "Annie tee."
"All yours, my sweet baby." Brittany promised, taking her out of my arms. "And we're going to bring it home and put twinkly lights and a star on top."
"Tinkle, tinkle staw!" Her eyes lit up, and she made her hands into stars again.
"And sparkly decorations too." I promised.
"Okay!" She clapped, causing every one of us to smile.
"Come on, Annalise, let's make some footprints in the snow."
Slowly, Brittany eased her down, taking Annie's outstretched hands on her own. Together, they walked (or the best version of walking Annie could go, considering she'd yet to take steps without one of us holding her hands) around in circles, my wife trying to point out the prints, but my daughter hardly focusing enough to look at them with all of the trees and the vast expanse of white that was laid out before us. While Finn worked on securing the trees to the sled, I moved beside Rachel and caught her watching my little family with as much adoration as I was.
"Just wait until next year, Rachel." I hooked my arm with hers, feeling like one of those occasional moments where I bared my emotions to her. "Christmas is still two weeks away, and yet I can already feel just how awesome it's going to be. There's something about having Annie at this age, even though she isn't old enough to understand, she's just amazed by all of the glitz and glitter."
"Wonder who she got that from." Rachel laughed, looking from Brittany to me. "It could be either one of you, in two very different ways."
"You know it." I smirked, and watched her rubbing her belly, her face soft at the thought of her own child. "I can't believe how close you are."
"I know. It's going to be unreal when he's finally here."
"More than you even know. Honestly, this and every Christmas, I don't think I could ask for anything better than those two. They're the reason that I'm so happy, even with all the shit that it started out with."
"I know." She nodded. "And I couldn't be more glad for you, Santana. You deserve every second of it, even if you are crass and oftentimes highly inappropriate."
"Don't worry, sweet baby Jesus will get used to me quickly."
"And I'm sure my half-Jewish son will absolutely love to hear how his godmother tried to hire Wise Men to show up at the hospital. Yes, Kurt told me, and no, it's not allowed."
"Well, Wise Men or not, I'll be there."
"Thanks, you know it means a lot to me."
"Yeah, yeah, don't start crying about it McHormones."
"And the nice moment is over."
By the time we'd taken care of paying, had a late lunch at some awesome German restaurant in the little town a few miles from the farm (Rachel was craving spaetzel), and we drove home and got the tree upstairs to our apartment, the sun was low in the sky. While Brittany took Annie to bathe her, I worked on wrapping the white lights around the branches of the tree, hurrying so I'd be finished in time for Annie to come out and see her tree all lit up. I'd barely wrapped the last strand when the came back out, Britt in sweatpants and Annie all snuggled up in her fleece reindeer pajamas, since we really had a problem with buying entirely too much holiday sleepwear for her. It took Annie a minute to notice that the living room had been transformed. Once she had though, I thought I was going to burst into tears at the happiness on her face, illuminated by the twinkling lights.
"Annie tee! Lies!" She cried, reaching out to touch them.
"Mamí did a beautiful job, didn't she Bean?" Britt beamed, sending me that special smile that was only mine.
"It really is a great tree, you did a beautiful job with that."
"We all did." Brittany corrected. "Let's put the star on top."
Carefully, I opened the box that my parents had given us a year earlier, and carefully removed the crystal tree topper from within. Slowly, almost reverently, I ran my thumb over the engravings at the bottom, as if I needed a reminder of the two dates that had changed my life in the best ways possible. Brittany watched me out of the corner of her eye and I flashed her a bright smile. Since she was taller than me, we swapped the baby and the star, and I held Annie up, guiding her hand with mine to help Brittany center the star on top of our beautiful tree. My fingertips brushed Brittany's, and she curled them to squeeze our daughter's hand before we backed away to assess our work. Even without the ornaments that we'd put on with our parents and Liz in the morning, it was definitely something special.
"Pitty tee!" Annie affirmed, nodding her little head, damp hair plastered against her forehead. "Tinkle, tinkle staw."
"You've got that right, corazóncita." I kissed her forehead, and then Brittany turned to kiss both of us. "Do you want to walk to the tree for us?"
"Annie tee." She answered, and Britt sat down beneath it, and I saw directly across from her, setting Annie on her feet.
"C'mere, Annalise." Brittany coaxed. "Come to Mama and see the tree."
I held my breath for the second time that day as Annie turned her head to look at me, and I nodded my encouragement. Several minutes passed, and she simply stood there, shifting her gaze between me, Brittany and the tree, deciding what exactly she should do. Finally, she slowly lifted up one foot, and before either Brittany or I could process that it was really happening, she took one, two, three, four steps. Britt's hands immediately clapped over her mouth, and I mirrored her actions, knowing that if I didn't control myself, I'd shout out in excitement and scare the baby. On the attempt at a fifth step, our girl fell flat on her butt, tears welling in her eyes, more startled than hurt.
"Annie fall." She announced sadly, and both Brittany and I were on her in an instant.
"You walked baby, you really, really walked." Brittany's eyes were full of her own tears, since every first in Annie's life meant so much more to us, as parents of a preemie, than so many other parents. "I'm so proud of you sweetheart."
"You did a great job Annie." I spun both her and Britt around, so outrageously happy. "You walked like such a big girl."
"Annie walk." She scrunched up her little face, almost surprised at the revelation, and the tears flowed freely down both of ours.
"God bless us everyone." Brittany joked, having just watched A Christmas Carol the night before, and both Annie and I burst into giggles, me from excitement and her because I was. "I love you both so much."
"Me too, Britt."
"Lub you Mama. Lub you Mamí." Annie said, and snuggled her face into my neck, yawning from all the excitement of the day. "Sleepy."
Once we'd kissed our daughter a hundred times, showering her with every praise that we could possibly think of, Brittany and I went back into the living room. She lay down on the couch, and gestured for me to come lay with her. Climbing on top of her, she immediately wrapped her arms around my body, hugging me close to her and kissing the top of my head.
"Merry Tree Getting Day" She pressed a kiss to my lips. "And Merry Annie's First Steps Day."
"And Merry Early Christmas."
"I'm telling you right now, San, this is going to be the best Christmas ever."
"It already is, Britt. It already is."
End Note: Title comes from Bryan Adams' Christmas Time and the song the girls sing in the car is Queen's Thank God It's Christmas. Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed. Have a wonderful, safe and happy holiday!