Arthur Read was sitting at the kitchen table.

"You know how it feels when something you used to be able to do, well, you couldn't do it anymore?" asked Arthur to the camera. "Like, one time..."

Fade to Fern, writing a poem in her diary.

"Fern was writing a poem once," Arthur narrated.

"The...end." Fern put her pencil down on her desk and leaned back in her swivel office chair to prop her feet up on the desk. She sighed happily. But, just as she was beginning to relax, the chair slid out from under her.

"Then she leaned back too far in her chair and she fell."

"Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa!" She tried her best to regain her balance and get the chair standing upright again, but she fell out of her chair anyway, and landed right on her hand. There was a loud snapping sound, and Fern grabbed her wrist and screamed bloody murder.

"She broke her wrist that day. She had to go to the hospital, and Fern wasn't allowed to write for almost two months."

Fern was next shown in bed with a cast on her arm. She sobbed and wiped her tears on her cast.

"And then there was the time that I was batting for our baseball team. It was the bottom of the final inning, with already two outs..."

Another flashback showed Arthur at the bat. The scoreboard showed that the score was 5-6, Lakewood needing one more run to catch up with Mighty Mountain, and two more to win. Buster threw the ball at home plate. But Arthur swung too early and the ball went into the catcher's mitt.

"Steeeerike two!" shouted Binky, the umpire.

"Swing later!" said Arthur's parents from the bleachers. "Come on! You can do it!"

The windup came, and then the final pitch of the game. Arthur swung as hard as he could...and ended up whacking himself in the face. Arthur fell backward, out cold, just as the last pitch of the game landed in the catcher's mitt.

"Steeeerike three! And he's out!" yelled Binky. Oh, the irony in that sentence.

Arthur's buddies ran over to him to see if he was okay.

"Arthur, wake up! The game's over, and it's time to go home!" cried the Brain into Arthur's ear.

"Well... technically, he is at home," joked Buster, stifling a snicker.

"Come on, Arthur! I have to get home and watch The Jazz and the Wreckless!" added the stuck-up rich girl Muffy.

Arthur made an unconscious coughing noise, which everyone mistook as a sign of life.

"He hears us!" everyone murmured to themselves.

"Dang it, Arthur! Your lousy swinging skills made us lose the stupid game!" said Francine, kicking dirt into Arthur's face.

Jane, David, and D.W. ran up to check on Arthur and weren't too happy to see him sprawled on the ground, head bleeding intensely.

"Arthur!" Jane rubbed Arthur's shoulder, and no response came from him. "Are you all right?" She checked his pulse. It was slightly weak, but it was there. "We have to get you to the hospital." She wrapped several bandages around Arthur's head.

David was no less concerned than his wife, but his voice remained calm as he told Jane what they were going to do. "On three, we'll both pick him up and take him to the car! One... two... three - lift!"

Struggling, they both picked up the K-O'd aardvark and strained as they carried him across the parking lot. D.W. just stood there and blew a raspberry at Arthur, but David snatched her away. They sat him down in the car and buckled him in. The flashback ended and it was back to the present day.

"I cracked my skull that day. I'm pretty lucky to have survived that... wait. Do you notice a recurring theme? Like, everyone ends up with broken bones? Hmm, let's change thr subjec -"

"ARRRRRTTTHUUUUUR!" D.W., Arthur's annoying little sister, interrupted.

Arthur flinched. D.W.'s shrill voice was almost too much for him to handle.

D.W. sprinted into the kitchen and grabbed Arthur's arm, practically dragging him into the den. They both sat down on the couch. "Look at what's happening on the news!"

"Hello, it's Marietta Brownie, and this is Channel 6 Action News," a reporter announced as a logo engulfed the screen. "Our top story this week: a 32-year-old man named Daer Ruhtra has kidnapped a nine-year-old girl in Elwood City this weekend..."

"Holy CRA - " started Arthur.

"Roll the episode title card!" D.W. shrieked, realizing that Arthur was about to utter something inappropriate.

FRANCINE AND THE OVERPROTECTIVE HELICOPTER PARENTS!

Francine rode her bike into the circle as the writing credits flashed on the bottom of the screen. "Yeeeee-haaaAAAAHH!" Pal, Arthur's dog, suddenly appeared and she swerved to avoid him. She lost her balance and fell off her bike, skinning her knee in the process.