author's note: kind of a songfic but not really. the idea in this story is slightly farfetched but hey, i think it's fun. i hope you enjoy and please revieew! it would make my day :) -lia

yo holla atcha disclaimer: uh so ya s/o to J.K. Rowling to creating these wonderful lovely characters & please enjoy my slightly terrible stories

Hot Mess by Cobra Starship


Well you're a hot mess and I'm fallin' for you.

And I'm like, hot damn let me make you my boo.

XXX

James Sirius Potter, Albus Severus Potter, and Hugo Weasley were about to do something that the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has never seen. They were going to throw a large scale, unbelievably wild party under all of the professors' noses. Even Filch and Mrs. Norris wouldn't stand a chance. It involved strategic planning and secretive invitations. Many spells were going to be needed: concealment charms, soundproof charms, hexes to prevent snitches from snitching. But who was going to cast them? They required a witch or wizard with intense brain power and high skill level.

"I know!" Albus shot from his chair, tipping it over and scattering the parchment that lay on the commonroom table before him. Both Hugo and James sent him surprised expressions. "We'll just ask Rose to do it. She's brilliant and the smartest in my year," he said, a satisfied smirk appearing on his face.

"Excellent plan," started Hugo, "except this is my sister we're talking about. There is absolutely no way she is going to help us get away with a party."

James let out an audible sigh, yet Albus remained unconvinced. "Ah, but there's one thing our dearest Rosie cannot deny," said Albus with that same smirk, "and that is, my mate: competition." He paused, letting the thought get through his companions' minds. "Especially competition with the one person who gets under her skin more than any of us."

"Scorpius Malfoy," the trio said in unison.

X

"You've got to be joking," snapped Rose, "I am not going to cast all of these charms just so you can throw some dumb rave." The three had pitched their party idea, just to see if Rose would have a sudden rebellious change of heart. Obviously, that did not happen.

"But Rose," whined Hugo, "I'm a fourth year and things are crucial at this point in my life. If people find out I helped plan this gig, I could be wildly popular beyond belief. And if they find out you helped keep it a secret from the professors, you might get snogged for once in your life."

At this statement, Rose's draw dropped to the floor. "I'll have you know," she said angrily, "that I am perfectly capable of being snogged at any point in my life. I do not need some party for that to occur." This statement was entirely untrue, however, for boys seemed to show a complete lack of interest in her. Nonetheless, she refused to do this for her brother and cousins.

"Fine," drawled Albus, "I guess we'll just have to go find someone else."

"Fine," repeated Rose.

"Hey Al," said James, "Whaddya say we go find Scorpius?"

Rose's brow furrowed at the mention of the name. "Malfoy? You're going to ask Malfoy? He's incapable of a simple levitation spell" –another lie– "much less the spells you want casted."

"Well, Rosie dearest," said James, "seeing as you're unwilling, we have no other choice."

"Don't call me that."

The three shrugged and began to depart from the bench on which Rose was seated.

"Wait," said Rose suddenly, standing with clench fists and pursed lips. She simply could not stand the idea of Scorpius Malfoy doing something she could do easily. That boy deserved nothing; he always gave her trouble about her grades, her hair, her bloodline, and countless other things. "I'll do it," she said with resolve.

"Excellent," replied Albus, smirking yet again.

X

Somehow, the three boys –with the aid of Rose– managed to pull if off. The Room of Requirement seemed to be the only appropriate venue, and it was fully protected thanks to the magic of, well, magic. The lighting, music, and dance floor were perfectly arranged. A never ending stockpile of alcohol was locked, loaded, and ready to go. The invitations, with all the information, had been hexed and rat-proofed. Everything was set.

Two hours before the party, Rose paced in her dormitory while biting her nails and twirling strands of her fiery hair. "I just don't know," she said to her friend Emma, "should I go? I mean, I practically made the whole thing happen. Well, not really. But I made sure they wouldn't get caught."

"Rose," replied Emma, "you should go. Let go of your inhibitions for once. Have some fun. I'm going and I fully plan on snogging James Potter."

The thought of that made Rose cringe. "Don't say that in front of me, he's my cousin."

"But he's the hottest seventh year around," countered Emma. "Don't you want to kiss someone for once? Maybe... I don't know... Malfoy?"

"That is horrifying, don't even say such a thing." Rose fell onto her bed, sighing and saying, "Maybe I should go. But I have nothing to wear."

"Oh, I'll take care of that," said Emma with an excited smile crossing her face.

X

The music was loud and the playlist was a healthy mix of wizard and Muggle bands. The lights were flashing at the center of the room, but not as headache-inducing on the outskirts. Rose sat awkwardly on a couch with a couple snogging themselves silly beside her. She nibbled on a handful of pretzels, bored to death and feeling utterly uncomfortable in the outfit Emma had picked out for her. The denim shorts were to low-cut and too short. The top was too tightly fitting and the hem exposed too much of her midriff. A drunken James had hung some odd, glowing rings around her neck before whisking Emma off to the dance floor.

In an attempt to free herself from this extreme boredom, Rose decided to rise and make her way around the edges of the room. Predictably, this was a huge mistake. A fellow sixth year female Gryffindor approached her, also superbly intoxicated, and giggled. "Wow, Rose," she slurred, "yo-oooo-u look su-uuuu-per fantastic. Who knew you had su-uuu-ch a body!?" Not knowing how to respond, Rose just nodded and walked away, even more self-conscious than before. As she continued to circle, she felt perspiration building and decided that maybe she should just leave to go study. Partying was not well suited for her.

Unsure whether she should tell someone of her departure, Rose wandered around for a little longer. She passed her younger brother, unskillfully and drunkenly flirting with a fifth year Hufflepuff. "So, like, yeah," she heard him say, "my cousin is totally the captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Totally cool, right?" Rose laughed to herself and kept moving. She saw Albus laying on a table while girls were taking body shots, Emma and James getting down on the dance floor, and even Lily Potter dancing on a table.

However, she soon realized that she should have left earlier, for an annoyingly familiar voice sounded behind her. "Well, well, well, if it isn't Weaslebee showing her face outside the library for once?"

She whirled around, throwing her hair over her shoulder. "Malfoy," spat Rose, "can I help you?"

Scorpius moved in close to Rose, closing the distance between their bodies to about two inches. He smelled of expensive cologne, sweat, and whiskey. He placed a hand on Rose's him and gave her a heartbreaking smirk. "Why yes," he said into her ear, "I think you can."

"Repulsive," replied Rose, opening the gap between them. "You're intoxicated." The upsetting part was that Rose felt herself crave him. His touch sent irresistible shocks of electricity through her body. That was when she knew it was definitely time to leave.

"C'mon, Weasley, lighten up," pleaded Scorpius, "At least let me get you a drink."

"I don't drink," stated Rose. Scorpius moved closer again, close enough so passersby forced their bodies to bump together. Rose felt butterflies rise in her stomach and an insatiable yearning for something she shouldn't want. She began to sweat more as her heartbeat rose and was acutely aware that Scorpius Malfoy was attractive and definitely desirable. His gray-blue eyes were piercing and beautiful and that platinum blonde hair practically begged to be mussed.

Stop, though Rose, This is Malfoy, for Merlin's sake.

Then, a pair of hands slid over Scorpius' shoulders from behind and down his chest. A face popped up and revealed that it was none other than Dahlia Parkinson. Her hair was jet black, her eyebrows were sharp, her clothes were skimpy, and her attraction to Scorpius was more than obvious. "Let's go do shots," suggested Dahlia, a flirtatious smile dancing across her lips.

"Sure," replied Scorpius, "Rosie, why don't you come with?"

"Don't call me that," snapped Rose.

"Scorpius, do you really think she can keep up?" asked Dahlia. The doubtful look on her face was enough to set Rose off. She never turned down a challenge and did not flinch in the face of competition, even if this one did involve alcoholic substances.

"Oh," said Rose with a tone of requital, "I can keep up."

This seemed to anger Dahlia and please Scorpius. "Then let's go," said the latter. He placed a hand on the small of Rose's back and led her to a table with shot glasses, lemons and limes, and countless bottles of liquor.

They all took their first shot together and Rose thought that she might cough her lungs up as well as the contents of her stomach. The liquor burned the back of her throat and brought tears to her eyes. She heard Dahlia scoff at her feeble attempt, but Rose refused to be defeated by such an annoyance. They continued, shot after shot after. Scorpius seemed unfazed, partially due to the fact that his level of inebriation was already very high and partially due to the fact that he was used to high alcoholic consumption. However, Rose noticed that the room had started to spin. She looked at the blonde boy beside her as he took another shot, his unbuttoned blue shirt swinging open to reveal –holy shit. Clouded judgement and uncontrollable limbs drew Rose's hands towards Scorpius' body. She just wanted to see if his abs were real. She needed to feel them.

"Another," smiled Scorpius, placing a glass in Rose's outstretched hand. She drank it without a second thought as Dahlia drank another, too. However, that last shot seemed to push Dahlia over the edge, because she quickly turned away and barfed all over some poor fourth year Ravenclaw.

"Oops," giggled Rose. Her vision blurred for a second and she swayed on her feet, losing her balance. Scorpius caught her smoothly and suggested that they go dance. Rose complied happily, somewhat unaware of her drunken state of mind.

The couple moved to the rhythm of the syncopated beat. Scorpius moved his hands up and down Rose's sides, brushing her thighs and lingering on her hips, grateful that she didn't leave.


The next morning, Rose found herself in a broom closet with a pounding headache and severely blurred vision. The sunlight shined through the window, lighting the dust particles like miniature disco balls that were reminiscent of the night before. Torn clothes and undergarments were strewn across the floor that she lay on. What happened? she thought to herself. She continued to rest on her side, not willing to move, and felt the plush blankets that had been laid down beneath her and on top of her with her fingertips. Then, the warmth that was pressed against her back groaned and moved away.

"Oh god," said Rose aloud, "Oh no." She stood quickly, tearing the blanket away to cover herself. "This cannot be happening."

The warmth that was on the ground turned out to be a boy with piercing gray-blue eyes and platinum blonde hair. His eyelids fluttered open as a look of content spread across his face. "Good morning, Rosie," he murmured.

"Scorpius, you need to put clothes on right now," demanded Rose.

"But Weasley, you're ruining the afterglow," said Scorpius, sitting up and pulling his pants on. Unfortunately and fortunately for Rose, he did not put a shirt on.

She sighed and tiptoed around to slip on her shorts, maintaining her grip on the blanket. "Merlin, the button is gone," she muttered, "Are you always this mean to clothes?"

"Only when I want them off," replied Scorpius.

Rose's shirt was hopelessly torn in half, so she reluctantly put on Scorpius'. "Malfoy, I hope you know that this never happened."

He winked at her. "Sure."

"God, I'm a mess," groaned Rose. Her head was throbbing, her hair was tangled in an unthinkable amount of knots, and Emma's shorts were ruined. How was she going to explain her state? She really did not want to do the walk of shame. However, it must be done. She gave Scorpius a final glare and opened the door.

"You're a hot mess," said Scorpius before she left. "I'll see you in Potions."

XXX

Stumblin' but yeah, you're still lookin' hella fine.

Keep doin' what you're doin' and I'ma make you mine.


author's note: soo idk if i should keep this a oneshot but pleaaase let me know what you think!