Title: Unfortunate

Part 1: Descent

Summary: One never knows just how far a mech is willing to go.

Characters: Starscream, Decepticons, Autobots

Warnings: bad mojo, character death

Continuity: G1

AN: This is not going to be a happy story. (Though, to be honest, are any of my stories?) This story was born from two things.

The first is Bad vs. Evil's song "Above the Law". It's a really good song, especially the hook/chorus. I started to write a story about an AU! Pre-War Starscream, one who never attended an Academy, one who never met Skyfire, one who never rose above the type-cast of war-build, and how that Starscream eventually managed to attract the attention of Megatron and claw his way up the ranks of the Decepticon Armada. It was going to be epic, but... well. I still might write that, but now right now.

The second thing that really influenced this story is the above quote. Bibliotecaria.D is one of my favorite TF writers on FF. She/He (profile doesn't say) writes these incredible stories that fit so seemlessly into canon that I'm constantly in awe. In the story Jezebel, She/He writes the line below this AN, and it struck me as just how impressive that really was. It made me think about Starscream, and what he does/is capable of that the G1 universe, and the fans themselves, make light of. I had to rewatch the series again, but this time I paid very, very close attention to Starscream, and by extent Megatron, because those two are practically canonnically paired. XD It's funny, but it's almost like the people who animated the G1 series couldn't deal with a real villain. Any time Starscream does something that is rather remarkable, someone/something comes up with a way to not only stop him, but humiliate him by extension. Same thing for Megatron.

So, yeah. Got to thinking. And then I decided that no matter how awesome Starscream could have been, there was obviously some sort of game he was playing with his "Lord," some greater design he was working towards, some line of reasoning that he very carefully toed. This story is the story of what happens when that 'line' is erased, and Starscream has nothing to keep him tethered.

Hint: A lot of mechs die.

"With no more malicious feeling than normal, he'd nearly destroyed a planet and them with it. He'd had nothing but a crippled human and his own hands. Now he had motivation."

-Bibliotecaria.D, Jezebel

He wakes, thoughts clouded and body aching, from a deep void that experience has taught him was stasis-lock. Warnings are blaring across his vision, but he is confused and in pain and in no mood to deal with his throbbing processor so he lets them. His vocalizer hurts, but his wings hurt more and he feels…

…different. Wrong. There is something wrong, something missing. He keeps his optics shuttered, but does a quick systems check – damaged, severely so, but all there. But…something is missing. It nags at him, a tugging in his already scrambled thoughts and his spark. And there is a noise – high-pitched with an almost desperate edge to the tone – so much noise.

It's screaming, he notes somewhat belatedly. Someone is screaming. It takes him several long clicks to notice that he is the one screaming. But why? Why would he scream like that? Sure he was in pain, but he had experienced worse before, hadn't he? Why?

And why did his spark ache so? It felt wrong, like it had been shredded and pieces were missing, like the day he had lost Skyfire times three.

"PUT HIM BACK UNDER!"

The yell startles him, but in a distant sort of way. The voice is familiar, comforting in a way, frightening in yet another, but familiar. Distantly he notes that he is still screaming – that is him, right? – and that there are now hands pressed against his frame, which he is also surprised to note, has been moving, straining against whatever-it-is that binds him to whatever he is on. Probably a berth.

There is pain, and his thoughts are growing fuzzier, more indistinct.

And then there is nothing.

It isn't real; it cannot be real.

He shakes his helm, shutters his optics, and presses his hands against his audials, unable to comprehend or accept what he is being told. It is alright if the constructicons grow more concerned at his actions because they are filthy liars, and he refuses to listen to their insanity any longer. There is no way, no way, that he is now alone; there is no way that his brothers and his bonded-mate could be offline; there is no way that they could have died during these simplistic "battles" they've engaged in since waking up on this miserable dirt-ball of a planet.

It is not possible; it is not real.

Even if his spark does feel like it has been shredded, that doesn't mean that they were gone. Damaged and in severe pain, yes. Dead? They couldn't be….

And then he remembers. The sickening crunches of two frames colliding in mid-air, the panicked scream of his youngest brother as they fall, slamming into the nuclear reactor, the sound of a fusion cannon and the roar of silence that envelopes him almost directly afterwards. Worst of all, the three almost-audible *snaps* in his spark – one each for….

He screams.

Megatron had been aiming at Prime, whom had dived, and ended up shooting Skyfire through the spark. Some Autobot had been aiming at Ramjet, whom had twisted out of the way, and ended up clipping Skywarp in the chassis – right where his teleportation mechanism sat. Skywarp had panicked and had warped. Where he had meant to go didn't really matter, as he had ended up warping right on top of Thundercracker, the momentum of which had slammed them right into the nuclear reactor the battle was taking place around.

Cue the light show, and the three holes in his spark.

The bond-mate he had previously wished wasn't, and the brothers that had made everything he had done and suffered worth it. All gone. One of them, he might have been able to handle. One of them he might even have been able to forgive. But not all of them. Never all.

It had been a series of mistakes and accidents all around, and Starscream is not so irrational that he does not know this. He knows. But he also knows that the pain which wrenches his spark continuously with every pulse where he lives and they do not needs something to blame. Something, someone. It doesn't matter.

Skywarp had mattered. Thundercracker had mattered. Even Skyfire had mattered, though Starscream would never have admitted it out loud. They had mattered; now everything that had kept Starscream somewhat sane and stable was gone. He could feel it, the insanity, pushing against the edges of his thoughts. He has lingered on the edge of this insanity for years beyond measure, always pulled back every time he strayed by one of his bonds, always kept as rational as possible by the simple fact that others depended on him to remain so.

But he has no one now. He has no one and nothing – without a trine, without fellow seekers capable of keeping up with him, he is worthless. Megatron has already taken advantage of this – Starscream is no longer the Air Commander, nor is he the Second in Command. He has been cut loose, completely and irrevocably alone and without any responsibilities to distract him.

And with every click the holes in his spark grow larger and heavier and threaten to consume him whole.

This was supposed to be a one-shot, but I'm too excited about this fic to bother with waiting until it's done. I hope you enjoy this! RnR?