James Tiberius Kirk and Leonard "Bones" McCoy had been fast friends ever since the latter threatened to throw up during their first convoy into space. But there comes a time in every friendship where one must step back and evaluate the sanity of the one you choose to call a friend. And now was that time for Leonard McCoy.

"You cannot be serious." He said, once he had finish gaping at Jim. "It'll never work, man!" McCoy insisted forcefully, shaking his head to emphasize his point. "You're off your goddamn rocker!"

Jim Kirk sat across from his friend. The cocky grin plastered on his face widened as he brought a cigar to his lips.

"I'm telling you, Bones, I can do it. I am the master." He responded with the Cuban gripped between his teeth.

McCoy slapped the cigar from Jim's lips, drawing an annoyed "Hey!" from the man.

"You aren't the goddamn Godfather, Jim, knock it off. Where the hell did you get that anyway?"

"I smuggled a box on board. Anyway, not the point, Bones. You can't distract me that easily." Jim told him as he picked the cigar up off the floor gingerly.

Just moments ago, the pair had been spending some time reminiscing about their academy days.

"Those were good times," Jim mused. "Great times," he amended after a thought. McCoy only scoffed in response.

"What!?" Jim cried.

"You only had fun because of all the women you slept with." Bones accused. "I'm shocked you didn't get more venereal diseases then you did."

It was then Jim's turn to scoff. "I'll have you know I didn't catch any, Doctor. I'm the master of seduction, not an idiot."

This time Bones laughed outright. "I don't know which part of that statement is more ludicrous. That you're the master of seduction or that you aren't an idiot. I distinctly remember you getting shot down more than your fair share of times."

"Those were because I wasn't trying! I can get anyone I want, any time, anywhere, any race." Jim retorted confidently, that signature smile starting to appear as he sipped his class of whiskey.

"Bullshit. I bet you never scored with a Vulcan."

Jim's eyes widened as he sprayed his drink across the room, coughing roughly. He finally managed to regain his composure.

"No," Jim said slowly. "But I bet you I could," he said with more assurance in his voice and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

McCoy looked at him quizzically.

"Oh, yeah? Who, Jim?"

Jim's smirk broadened. He leaned forward in his chair, resting his forearms on his knees. A bit of ash from his cigar fluttered to the ground at his feet.

"Spock."

And it was this simple suggestion that led Leonard McCoy to doubt his friend's sanity.

"James Tiberius Kirk," Bones said slowly, as if he were trying to talk a suicide jumper down from a ledge. "You simply cannot seduce that green-blooded hobgoblin. It can't be done. Not only is he a cold bastard, but he doesn't feel, Jim. He has no sex drive."

"See that's what I thought, too. Until I saw him playing tonsil hockey with Uhura."

"And then there's that. He's a…taken man." Bones choked out with a shudder.

"Never stopped me before," Jim responded with a shrug.

"This is insane, man."

"Insane enough for you to bet on it?" The Captain suggested, joy at the clearly implied challenge written all over his face.

Bones considered the offer. From his perspective, he really had nothing to loose, seeing as there was no way Jim could win.

"Yeah." He said finally. "Why not? I'd like the chance to prove you wrong for once." McCoy paused. "And the terms?"

"If I get Spock to want to sleep with me, you have to show up on the bridge in full ladies attire of my choosing. Shaven legs and all."

"And when you loose?" McCoy asked confidently.

Jim looked at Bones and shrugged. "It's your bet."

McCoy only thought about his condition for a moment.

"You 'ave to be my pet for a day. And you have to do anything I wish of you. Collar, leash and all." McCoy told Jim, smiling a little.

"Deal," Jim replied, extending his hand. Leonard had to admit, he was a little taken aback. He never expected Jim to agree to his terms so willingly. In fact, he half hoped the crazy request would have deterred him from going on with this. But Jim seemed pretty confident. Too confident for Leonard to pass up the opportunity.

"Fine," he said, gripping Jim's hand. "You have one week." To McCoy's dismay, Jim's shit eating grin only grew.

"You're on, Bones." And with that, Jim stood up and bounded out of the rec room.

Once Jim was out of ear-shot, McCoy rested his head in his hands and heaved a sigh. He picked Jim's half-smoked cigar up from the ash tray and took a long drag.

"Damn…"

Hello all! This is my first real attempt at fan fiction, but I've been writing for a while. I hope you all like the story so far. I promise there will be more K/S as the story progresses. I LOVE reviews of all kinds, flames and criticism included. As long as the criticism is properly articulated and not just 'I HATE YOU' followed by a string of profanities over and over and over. (Though I do accept 'I LOVE YOU' followed by a string of praise XD) Also, this is unbetaed so all mistakes are my own damn fault.