A/N: My first Wedges fic. Just a short one-shot set post Pool Shark.
Hope you like it!
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
No Sunshine
He must be crazy. That's the only excuse he manages to come up with as he stares up at her apartment. The rain beats down on his windshield and he watches the drops trickle down the glass. He shouldn't be here, because she made it perfectly clear that she was leaving and there were no words he could say, nothing he could do to convince her otherwise. He can still smell her perfume on him from the embrace they shared in the locker room.
Normally that memory would make him smile but when that hug served as a goodbye he wasn't even sure smiling was possible. A movement to his left catches his attention and suddenly she's standing there, watching him with a dazed look and he doesn't know what to do. He panics and wonders if he should talk to her, because the possibility that she would actually listen was so minuscule it made him cringe.
But then again what kind of man would he be if he just let her go? He remembers the look on Grissom's face, when Sara left him with nothing but a letter and a kiss. He watched the man crumble and there was no way he would let that happen to himself. So he takes a deep breath and steps out into the cold, unforgiving rain, keeping his gaze locked on her. Her hair is plastered to her face and he can see her shiver, even beneath her heavy coat.
He ignores the rain as it soaks his clothes and obscures his vision because this was his last chance and nothing was going to stop him. When he finally stops in front of her he pauses, waiting for her to tell him it was pointless, but the only thing that greets him is silence. So he draws in a breath and opens his mouth, only to realize every thought, every line he had made up in his head was gone. So he decides to wing it instead.
"Stay," he manages to whisper, his voice barely audible over the pounding rain. He can practically hear her begging him without a single word, he can see the desperation in her eyes as a sound that somewhat resembles a sob escapes her lips.
"David.." she whispers his name with such a gentle force he has to close his eyes and take another breath to steady himself. When he opens them again she's right in front of him, so close he can smell the shampoo in her hair, and the perfume on her skin.
Water clings to her eyelashes and he can't tell if it's the rain or her tears. They must look like fools, and he laughs inwardly when he realizes that maybe he is a fool for still trying. He feels her hand reach up and caress his cheek and his body becomes rigid. Her touch is unbelievably gentle but when he sees the look in her eyes he knows he's fighting a losing battle. But still, it never hurt to try. Right?
"Please, Wendy? We can talk to Ecklie, we can work something out, just please don't go." she's crying now, even in the rain he can tell. Her shoulders shake and she purses her lips to keep the sobs at bay. He feels bad, because he's the one standing here, making her feel guilty for leaving him, but then again that is what's happening. Isn't it?
Deciding he had no strength left to argue he reaches out and pulls her into his chest, letting her sob into his shirt as he pressed kisses to her hair. It goes on for what feels like hours, but he's thankful anyways because it gives him that much more time with her.
Finally she cries herself out and pulls away from him, wiping her furiously at her eyes as if he hadn't already seen her crying. He knows this is it, there's nothing more to say, because he finally understands what he was meant to do from the beginning.
So instead of begging, instead of crying and screaming and insisting that she doesn't understand what she's doing, he reaches down and he kisses her cheek. His lips linger for just a second before he straightens back up and turns away, walking towards his car with his clothes plastered to his body and rain dripping down his face.
He can almost swear he hears her call his name, but he doesn't look back, he just keeps walking until he reaches the car, sliding inside and savoring the warmth. He watches her as she stumbles towards her own car, boxes and crates stuffed into the back before he turns the key in the ignition and his engine comes to life.
He watches her from the rearview mirror until she disappears and it's then that he suddenly pulls the car over on the side of the empty road. And it's then that he realizes what he's done, and no matter how selfless he was it was still him that let her go. And it's then that David Hodges begins to cry.