This is a miniseries that's related to the future. Wouldn't be the first time I've skipped ahead to do some plot and character development. Feel My Pain was one such instance. What happens in there is canon to the Dawnstar's Legacy and No Wings to Fly storylines. What happens between the main story lines and the oneshot releases remains to be seen. The intent is that this miniseries can be a standalone storyline for those who have not read my other stories. It's also not very action-y. It's more reflective and meant to show something about the character(s) it features.
Note: this miniseries and Feel My Pain contain spoilers, a significant amount of them. If you do not want to be spoiled at all, do not read this story or Feel My Pain. They will all connect eventually.
Now onwards to the actual story!
Dawnflight's Sons pt. 1: Rain Falls from Silver Clouds
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Mist curled around the pale lake waters. The sky had just begun to awaken from its nightly slumber. A few stars were still visible in the sky, blinking softly and faintly as the emerging sun dulled their sheen. The lake water took on the pale view of the sky and a few clouds lazily drifted across the last remaining stars. A lithe, silver tabby form trotted along the pebbly lake shore. His white paws padded easily along the wet terrain. The mist felt cool on Silvercloud's pelt; it was unusually cold this morning for an early leaf fall morning. The cold had seeped through his thin pelt, urging him to awaken from the warriors' den earlier than usual. Invasive thoughts had kept him from curling back up in his nest. Now that he was outside of camp, the tabby tom felt wide awake and restless. His paw pads itched for movement and he had sought the familiarity of the lakeside territory for comfort.
The silvery warrior took a few steps towards the pale colored, early morning waters. The air was still, the breeze, stagnant. In the nearby grass, crickets chirped quietly. But to Silvecloud, it was just mindless white noise. His ears stood erect, facing forward, listening for any sounds of prey scuttling on land or fish swirling in the lake. Nothing. Silence. Just cricket songs. Silvercloud took in a breath and steeped into the still lake water. He ignored the icy shock of the sudden temperature change on his paws. He waded into the water further, the sunrise laden lake fully concealing his paws. His pads numbed against the cold water and small stones. He relished the discomfort it gave him. It dulled the constant dissent that had plagued his mind for several moons now. It ate at him like a slow working disease. He was aware of its presence with every day, every warrior task and every encounter he had with his kin. He hated it. He hated how much his family divided his mind and his emotions. He hated how his family heritage, their accomplishments, and their reputation among the other clans shaped his life. Silvercloud repressed a growl. He took another breath of the moist, lake air. His white tipped tail swished the surface of the water, leaving ripples he could see below his chest fur. The silver tom waded even further into the lake until the water reached his shoulders. Then, he sucked in the misty air and dove under the sun kissed surface. As his head went under, Silvercloud pressed his ears to the sides of his head and he shut his emerald eyes. Water surrounded him, and small currents flowed around his streamlined form. The muffled sounds of the flow echoed in his ears, despite his efforts to keep them shut. The tom puffed out the air in his lungs, which bubbled upwards around his whiskers. Then, with a powerful kick from his hind legs, the tabby tom's face broke he surface of the lake. Silvercloud blinked his green eyes and suck in the moist, lake air. He swam strongly back to the shallower shore areas, where his claws found hold amongst the sand and pebbles. His white paws easily waded through the lake and carried him to dry land. The warrior swallowed a small sigh and shook his pelt. Water droplets landed on the ground next to him, soaking the grass. Silvercloud shivered a little, the air chilling his thin pelt. The silvery tabby sat down on his haunches, not minding the feeling of wetness on his hindquarters and tail. He looked down at his paws in on the grassy ground. His pure white paws contrasted starkly against the leafy green of the grass. The stripes on his forelegs were much paler than the stripes on the rest of his pelt, making his legs look like they took on a flat silver hue. He gasped when he noticed the resemblance to his mother's forelegs and paws. Almost disgusted with himself, he quickly pulled his legs under his chest and tucked his paws under himself to hide them
They said I look so much like her.
Silvercloud thought to himself as licked his chest fur out of habit. He stared out onto the lake instead at his own body. The sun hard risen some and the sky was turning pinkish orange. All the remaining stars had disappeared under the sun's bright rays. Silvercloud marveled at how beautiful it looked. He so was entranced at the natural sight before him, he barely noticed that another cat had materialized beside him. His emerald green eyes widened in shock at the scarred, black tabby she cat that stared out over the lake beside him. Her white chin, paws and ears shone brightly against her dark fur. Gray streaks along her muzzle and flanks displayed her old age. Silvercloud's mind almost forgot to register the ShadowClan scent that wafted in waves off the she cat. Though, much to his surprise, he didn't feel threatened by the intruder. Clearly, she was an elder. Regardless of whether she was from ShadowClan or not, Silvercloud thought that she at least should have some respect. His silver ears flicked back neatly against his head when he decided to speak to her.
"I think you've found the wrong cat." he mewed at last, breaking the silence. The black tabby blinked her bright amber eyes but didn't move her gaze from the sun rising over the lake. She flicked her ears briefly.
"No, I found the right cat." She replied and turned to face Silvercloud. Her eyes seemed to glow at him in the early morning sun. Silvercloud felt slightly intimidated at the sight.
"You must be mistaken. Perhaps you're confused, since I think you're lost since you're out of your territory. I can escort you back to the border, I don't blame you for mistaking me for someone else. After all, they do say I look a lot like-!" the tabby she cat put a paw on Silvercloud's muzzle, stopping him midsentence. The she cat stared at him, her amber gaze hardened. She gently removed her white paw from his muzzle before speaking again.
"I did not trek all the way here to speak to your mother. I made the journey to speak to you. Obviously, something is bothering you. So, out with it! Speak!" The ShadowClan elder meowed flatly. Silvercloud almost thought he detected the faintest bit of a laugh in her voice. He blinked at her, shocked. Cats did not talk to him with the intent of having a genuine conversation wit him. Cats typically wanted to hear about his mother or his father's expectations of him. Silvercloud was quiet for several heartbeats, too taken aback to say anything to the she cat. Growing impatient, the black tabby she cat huffed and continued on with her own talk.
"I'm not sure how many stories you've heard about Falconstar, but I'll tell you a bit about him. I'm old," the she cat twitched her whiskers, "I remember the time when he wasn't the brute a lot of RiverClan's warriors knew him to be. He was once a noble warrior. At that time, I was proud to call him my clanmate." The ShadowClan elder's amber eyes looked wistful for a moment. Then, she took a breath and continued. "Eventually he rose up the ranks and became clan leader. StarClan gave him their blessing and he got nine lives. Cats all over the lake territories admired him. He was skilled, smart, handsome and wise for his age. I dare say he was a brilliant cat. He always had a pack of she cats padding after him as well. I was not among them."
The black tabby smirked a little. Silvercloud listened intently, unsure of where this story was going. He thought that maybe this elder sitting next to him was going off on a tangent as many elders do in their old age. But she continued, her mew as strong as when she started.
"Falconstar did not have an interest in the she cats that vied for his attention. He loved them like he did all his clanmates, but he did not love them as more than that. He loved only one cat more than he loved his clan: me. I did not share the same feelings. I even told him that. I remember the look of hurt on his face that day. It honestly crushed me, I didn't mean ill will towards him as a cat or a warrior and I especially didn't intend to break the heart of my own clan leader."
Silvercloud cocked his silver head at her slightly.
"What did he say to you after you rejected him? Did he punish you?"
The she cat laughed heartily, pleased that Silvercloud had finally managed to talk to her.
"Ah, he does speak! But, no, he did not punish me. Back then, Falconstar was not the kind of cat who would abuse his power and position like that. He did later in his life, but not during the times he was padding after me like a love-sick dove. He was persistent, I'll give him that. Every quarter moon he asked me to be his mate and my answer remained the same. Then, one day out of the blue, he asked me to have his kits."
Silvercloud's mouth gaped in mild shock.
What kind of a cat would ask such a thing to a cat who doesn't even want to be mates with him?
The black tabby she cat's whisker's twitched.
"Ah, well, in RiverClan most queens must have kits out of love, which is perfectly fine. But in Shadowclan, some cats agree to have kits with another clanmate even though they aren't mates. It's a business agreement of sorts, built out of respect and trust or friendship rather than romantic love. I wasn't surprised that I was being asked this, but I was slightly disgusted by his words, if I'm going to be honest. But, Falconstar was my friend and my clan leader. I decided I could at least honor and respect his wishes. So, I said yes, much to his surprise."
"Did you ever fall in love with him later?" Silvercloud asked honestly. The she cat shook her head.
"Nope. I felt the same way about him as I did before, even after the kits were born. I eventually had two litters with him. Some of my kits still live in ShadowClan today. But, when news of my first pregnancy came out, the whole clan knew that I was having Falconstar's kits. I was labeled as Falconstar's mate, his partner, even though I was simply being a good friend and following the warrior code. I was given lots of privileges before and after my kits were born. All the sudden, I got more respect simply for being Falconstar's mate. It didn't matter if I messed up or made mistakes or got into arguments. I got my way because of my label. This was especially true after a greencough plague. Falconstar lost three lives that season. We also lost two warriors, some kits, an apprentice and two elders. After the clan recovered, Falconstar lost another life in a battle with ThunderClan after they chased a fox into our territory. He was never the same after that." The black tabby she cat blinked slowly, her bright amber eyes burned with an emotion that Silvercloud couldn't name. The silvery furred tom felt a stab of pity in his chest for her, since she had to relive the memories by telling him all this. "Falconstar changed," the ShadowClan elder stated, "he was no longer the proud, noble and considerate warrior I knew my whole life. He became painfully aware of his and ShadowClan's mortality. He became paranoid and distrustful of the other clans and his own warriors. He didn't sleep much, and I often had to share a nest with him while I fed him poppy seeds, so he would get some rest. This was when he started abusing his position. With his new-found insanity, Falconstar started making strange, unreasonable decisions. I won't name some of them, but the scar under my eye is the result of one of them. Cats who didn't comply with his decisions or words were punished or exiled. The Falconstar I knew before had died with his first four lives." The tabby elder said soberly. Silvercloud gazed his green eyes at her softly.
"Are you trying to make sure I don't become like him because you thought I was going to drown myself in the lake?" Silvercloud asked. He was curious since he still didn't quite understand where the conversation was taking him. The elder shook her head again.
"No. I know better than to assume a RiverClan warrior would try to kill themselves by drowning. The point is coming soon, be patient. So, since Falconstar was feared by ShadowClan, I was feared by proxy. My title caused my clanmates and my friends to shy away from me. If Falconstar thought someone meant ill will towards me, they were sure to be punished. I hated how everyone I knew and loved walked on robin's egg shells around me. They treated me like the clan leader, as if I was delicate and cruel. My reputation among the other clans was becoming as tarnished as Falconstar's. It was even worse when our deputy retired and I was chosen in her place. I firmly believe he chose me because he was still in love with me and he made a last ditch attempt to earn my affection. It was then, I decided to put an end to it. Not only for myself, but for ShadowClan. We had been under moons of oppressive, violent leadership. Falconstar was one of ShadowClan's longest reigning leaders. Luckily, Falconstar had been planning on a territory war with RiverClan, it was the perfect chance to take his last life. I secretly met with your mother, of all cats, so that we could get rid of Falconstar in the midst of the battle where no one would notice what we were doing. We failed to realize that your medicine cat would come along as a field medic. Falconstar went after her and mauled her. That's why she has that ugly scar down the side of her shoulder. Your mother and I didn't think Falconstar would be so fox hearted as to attack a medicine cat. Our plan had failed, but Falconstar ended up dying in battle anyway because your grandmother killed him while defending your medicine cat. Then, I ended up becoming leader."
Silvercloud mentally pawed himself in the face. He hadn't recognized ShadowClan's current leader! He had mistaken her for a confused elder. Silvercloud's pelt smoldered with embarrassment. The black tabby she cat next to him just chuckled, sensing his realization.
"You're starting to get it now! A little longer and we'll have made it to the moral of the story. After Falconstar went down, I called for a retreat. Most of the clan didn't care whether we won or lost. We just wanted the battle to be over. One of my warriors took Falconstar's body and we held vigil. That night, I chose a deputy and received my nine lives. After I returned to camp, it felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders. I was no longer living in Falconstar's shadow. I was no longer 'Falconstar's mate,' I was Torrentstar. I was a ShadowClan warrior, not a label. When I first approached you, you saw me as an elderly she cat. You didn't see me as just the leader of ShadowClan. You saw me as someone who was going to pass on some wisdom and a story to you."
Silvercloud gawked at Torrenstar. His emerald eyes swirled with conflicted emotions. Torrentstar kept talking.
"You are not your mother's son. You are not your father's least favorite kit. You're a RiverClan warrior. You're a tom who wants to do his best to serve his clan. You're not a label. Your mother and father don't define you. Start making decisions for yourself. Start making a name for yourself." Torrentstar's bright amber gaze hardened and her smile faded, her face stern and commanding. Silvercloud was slightly taken aback by the sudden change.
"My parents will always be my parents. I'll never live up to them!" the tom protested. Torrentstar batted his ears and made a small hiss. Silvercloud flinched and dug his claws into the wet grass.
"What did I just say? You aren't defined by your parents and what they did. You define yourself. Start seeing yourself as you, not them. You are not a shadow! You are a cat! You are a warrior! Repeat after me, Silvercloud, I am a warrior!"
"I am a warrior." Silvercloud mewed, trying to raise his voice. Torrentstar seemed unimpressed.
"Again. I am a warrior and I live my own life. I am in no cat's shadow."
"I am a warrior and I live my own life. I am in no cat's shadow."
The black tabby she cat seemed satisfied with Silvercloud's reaction. Torrenstar stood up, her posture straight and confident. Silvercloud wished he could act like that on a daily basis.
"Good. Say that to your reflection in the lake every morning. Get up early if you have to. Drill it into your mind that you are not just someone's shadow. You have your own life to live and your own legacy to make."
Suddenly, the black tabby she cat swiped her claws at Silvercloud. Instinctively, he ducked and struck her forelegs, causing the old cat to buckle into the grass. Silverclould's fur stood on end along his spine and his white tipped tail fluffed out. He hissed at the ShadowClan leader, feeling betrayed.
How dare she? What was that even for?
Then, he felt bad for her. She was an elderly cat on her last life. She probably wouldn't be surviving many more battles. Maybe this was one of the few ways she could get one without joining StarClan. But Torrentstar just laughed when Silvercloud let his fur lie flat. Her amber eyes sparkled as she stood back up onto her white paws. She flicked her tail approvingly at the RiverClan warrior.
"Your mother would have never done something as amazing as that. Don't you see? You are better than her in plenty of ways. Your mother would have just taken the hit. She's a lot slower than you think she is in battle. Take the time to better your talents and interests. Choose a different path than the one your mother took."
Silvercloud felt elated at the old warrior's praise. He stood up straight and his chest fur fluffed out. His emerald eyes shone with a renewed pride. Torrentrunner cracked a smile at him, letting her fangs show.
"Well, I've always wanted to be a medicine cat. I like being a warrior, but I find herbs and healing fascinating." Silvercloud meowed, looking at his paws meekly. Torrentstar beamed at him.
"There you go. It's not too late to follow that path. Become the best medicine cat the clans have ever seen!"
Silvercloud let out an excited mew, his vigor returned to him. He focused his gaze back to Torrentstar, but found she was gone. He frantically looked around the area and searched for her scent, but there was none. He raced to the border, grass and stray reeds clung to his water laden pelt. Stones and dirt scattered at his paws. The ShadowClan cat disappeared! Silvercloud cursed his seemingly poor tracking skills. His ears flicked back and forth, searching for the sound of her paw steps or the sound of wet ground sloshing around. Silence met his ears. A bit crestfallen and panicked at letting a warrior from another clan freely roam RiverClan's territory, Silvercloud bounded towards the border. The trees and reeds thinned until the silver tabby reached the clearing between ShadowClan and RiverClan lands. The border scents alerted his senses to its presence. Silvercloud pushed his way out of the bushes and reeds and stalked towards the border, coming face to face with Torrentstar! Shocked, the tom let out a squeak of surprise. Torrenstar smirked at him.
"How did you do that?" Silvercloud asked, still confused as to how the ShadowClan leader had disappeared right beneath his nose. Torrentstar twitched her whiskers and smirked.
"It's a ShadowClan trick. Maybe I'll teach you in the future. But only if you decide to become a medicine cat." The tabby she cat narrowed her eyes slightly. Silvercloud nodded.
"I will. I will follow the path of a medicine cat!"
Torrenstar (Torrentrunner) belongs to Nightmask