Italics: memories

Day 216

They say she's in a coma; but he likes to think she's sleeping.

He finds it easy to pretend with the memories of the accident slowly fading; becoming as distant as the briefly recalled flashes of a dream. When there's nothing to do but watch her, it becomes very easy to imagine the tubes aren't tangled along her pale arms; the oxygen mask isn't hiding her full, pink lips; and the tender scar isn't slicing through the skin of her cheek. In fact, he can almost fool himself enough to see the hospital bed adorned with familiar dark blue sheets, with a single pillow to cradle her head. He likes to close his eyes and imagine he is laying beside her, watching her small nose wrinkle as breaths of beautiful laughter escape her lips. It's how he remembers her. How he chooses to remember her.

He tries to forget the rest.

Two months have past since the accident; and he has been beside her every day since. By now, the nurses have begun to recognise him; the man with the sad blue eyes. They know he can't be much older than twenty; not quite a man, not quite a boy. Puppy, they decided to call him. They would mutter a brief greeting as Puppy past by in the corridors, to which he might despondently grunt or ignore them altogether. But they have enough understanding of his situation to let the impolite responses, or lack there of, slide. His priorities don't lie with idle chitchat and forced civility. They lie with the young woman in room 10.

And he is back again today.

The man, as usual, walks with his head down. His clothes - a black blazer, white shirt and dark jeans - are crumpled, much like his mess of blonde hair. Everything about him is messy, even the way he walks; with his hands buried in his pockets, and his shoulders dropped almost comically low. He passes the open doors of the elevator and takes the stairs beside it, letting each step come to meet him in their own time. On the next floor, a half open door spills a shaft of bright light into the corridor. He makes for it, his eyes finally raising to meet the number 10. A nurse walks out of the room as he approaches, her eyes averted to the clipboard in her hands. He recognises her, but he doesn't return the kind smile she offers as she walks by. He waits a moment, then, shrugging his hands out of the blazer pockets, he pushes open the white door to room 10.

When he sees her, his lips spread into a soft smile. "Hey, Naminé…I'm back."

Naminé, however, doesn't answer. Her eyes remain lightly closed as she goes on laying in the hospital bed, her small frame covered by the pristine sheets. There is a small vase of flowers on the nightstand; lilies, her favourite.

"Sorry I'm late," Puppy says softly, briefly raising a hand in which he holds a small book. "I brought Landon and Jamie. I thought you probably missed them." He chuckles lightly. "I know you can't go a day without reading this book."

Still no answer. Luckily, he doesn't expect one.

"You know, Sora said he might come by to see you later," he says, taking his usual seat by the bed. His hand fits into hers, his fingers curling around her small, still ones. It doesn't feel like she's touching him at all. He feels as though he is taking advantage, because he knows she would move away if she could, and he tries not to hate it. "He hasn't had much of a chance, since he and Kairi moved away. But he's back in town…you know, for the holidays…"

"Only losers hate Christmas, Roxas."

"I don't hate Christmas. I resent that it's frowned upon for an adult to sneak downstairs to open presents at two in the morning."

She laughs. "Aw, you're not an adult yet, Roxas."

"Hey, I can vote and everything."

"Yes. But you really are as old as you feel."

He finds that he can't help but grin. "Touché."

"…I know you…might…" he trails off, forgetting the words even as he says them. Flashes of soft blue eyes freeze his hand, the pale thumb that was slowly caressing the soft skin of her hand. He hears laughter, soft and beautiful; his unique music…made only by her.

"I…left that job at the café," he says, smiling because she would be proud of him. "I know you hate that I work there. Now I don't." He laughs, but something snatches the sound away. It's sadness. "I…think I might…"

"…go out for a while."

He looks up, meeting cool blue eyes. "What?"

"I said I'm going out."

"I'll come with you."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I want to be alone, Roxas."

"I…really miss you," Roxas says, his voice little more than a choked sob, as his fingers close tightly around hers. He wants her to hold him back, but she doesn't. "It's…really hard to…you know I…"

"…you know I still care about you."

His laugh is cold. "Is that right?"

She sighs. "Roxas…please, don't-"

"Don't you dare do that."

"Roxas…"

"Don't talk to me like I'm some stupid annoyance, Naminé!"

"God…" Roxas breathes a laugh, wiping away the tears that begin to brim his blue eyes. His stomach feels empty, like there's nothing but a huge black hole that's pulling him in…and in. "Sorry, I keep having meltdowns around you, don't I? I should just start reading…"

He doesn't allow the smile to slip away, however painful it is to his chest. He props open the small book in his lap, using his one free hand to hold the pages apart. And, with a deep trembling breath, he begins to read.

And he'll come back tomorrow. He'll walk through the door with '10' engraved into the wood; maybe with words to say, or another book to read. He'll tell her he misses her, and he'll smile and laugh at comments and memories that hurt. He'll tell her about all the people that are going to visit, even if he knows they won't. And then, at the end of the day, he'll lean forward and leave a soft kiss on her forehead. She won't react, she'll just sleep.

Then he'll turn away and he'll drive home, where he will wait for another morning. But he'll be careful when he leaves, careful not to make a sound, in case he disturbs her.

Because he likes to think she's sleeping.

I hadn't planned on starting a new story, but i couldn't ignore this one. I may leave this as a oneshot, but i have ideas for it to become chaptered, in which case this would be a prologue. I'm happy with how this turned out as well, and that hasn't happened on fanfiction yet =)
Please review and let me know what you thought, and whether i should leave this as it is, or if i should continue.