an. when reading this I suggest playing the song "colder weather" by zac brown band.
Disclaimer:I do not own Randy Orton, or anything else owned or associated with the WWE. No harm or offense was attended by this story.
an: Background Info: Macy Anderson had dated Randy Orton in high school. After graduation she had moved to Colorado but kept in contact with Randy as friends. She loved him desperately but he didn't want to be tied down. When he signed with the WWE he began visiting her whenever he was in Colorado, and they began another relationship.
Colder Weather
Macy Anderson slid out of bed. Randy wasn't beside her like he had been when she had fallen asleep. She had been ecstatic when there relationship had started to emerge again about a year earlier. Unfortunately, every visit ended with him leaving in the morning to head to the next city he would be working in.
Macy had always loved Randy, and she knew he loved her too; he just wasn't the type for committing. She had accepted that a long time ago; yet, she couldn't stop the heartache she felt every time she watched his care leave the driveway.
She knew his work was demanding and he loved her even if he left—she just wished it didn't have to be that way.
That's why when he had shown up two days before with what seemed like a possible shoulder injury she had hoped he would stick around. She wrapped herself in her robe and glanced out the window.
Nothing but white, there appeared to be no sign of life outside her windows. She sighed and walked out to the kitchen to see if Randy simply couldn't sleep.
He wasn't there. She glanced out the window. The headlights to his car were on and the engine was running. She went over to the door and pulled it open.
Macy watched Randy's black SUV pull out of the driveway and disappear down the road.
He was gone and he hadn't even woken her.
-x-
Macy stood in the doorway for a few minutes. She felt nothing, but that she began to feel the cold wind wrap around her body; she felt the cold wrap around her heart as well. She slowly closed the door and locked it.
She pulled her robe tighter around her body and slowly made her way back to her bedroom. She felt tears welling up in her eyes but she refused to set the free. She would not cry over Randy, she had cried over him one too many times. She was about to turn off the lamp on her bedside table when she noticed the note lying beside it.
Should she read it? What if he was leaving her for good? Why else would he leave in the middle of the night?
She sat down on the edge of the bed and picked p the note. She held it with shaking hands and began to read.
Macy,
I'm sorry I had to leave without saying goodbye. McMahon says I am cleared to go back to work, I had to leave now to get to the next city in time. I'll call you soon. I love you Macy.
Randy.
Macy reread the letter. He had left to go back to work. In some ways she felt better and in others she felt worse.
She was glad he wasn't breaking up with her, but yet, she had been hoping the love she had shown him over the last year would have been enough to make him stay, not permanently, he loved his work, but for longer than a day or two.
She had been wrong, he had stayed two days and the second he got word he could wrestle he had left her. She was second to his career.
-x-
Two weeks later Randy was sitting, alone, at the front counter of a small diner. He looked down at his cup of coffee and sighed. He had been thinking a lot of Macy; it would be another two weeks before he was back in Colorado. He missed her, but he didn't want to admit it. He didn't need her, he had his career to fulfill him, and he didn't need a relationship.
A small, blond waitress walked over to him, she was wearing a white blouse and the diner's signature apron. She had her blond locks tied back in loose pony-tail and, most surprisingly she wore a genuine smile. "Is there anything else I can get you sir."
Randy looked into the waitress stunning blue eyes. Dark, swirled with gray, like the ocean, yet so full of life, and he thought of Macy. Macy's eyes had the same cold colors, but her eyes, like the waitresses, still managed to carry warmth and life. She was Vibrant.
"Uhm, no, no, I'm fine thank you." The waitress nodded and gave him his bill. He paid it and tipped her before stepping out into the cold night air. Once he was outside he pulled out his cell phone and dialed Macy's number.
-x-
She answered on the second ring. "Hello."
"Hey Macy, how are you?" He felt a sudden wave of warmth crash over him when he heard her voice, he no longer felt the cold, or at least, if he did he didn't care enough about it to notice.
"I'm fine Randy, How are you?" She didn't sound cold, but she didn't sound as happy as she normally did either.
"I'm fine Macy, I just miss you, I'm stuck with work for the next two weeks, but then I'll be back In Colorado, can I come see you?"
"I don't know Randy; I have to see about work and stuff—"
"Can I call you tomorrow; I really want to see you"
There was silence on the other end. "I don't know Randy, will you call?"
"Of course I will."
"It's taken you this long to call Randy—"
"I was busy Mace—please"
"Randy, you were born to be a superstar, I know that and you aren't going to change, but you weren't born to be a superstar and be with me, your work is demanding, but you love it, and I understand that, but I don't want to be dragged on like this forever with no promise of a future—"
"Macy Anderson I love you—" he started, but she wasn't there, he heard the faint click. He tried to call again but she didn't answer.
-x-
Two weeks later Randy found himself sitting in his SUV on the road outside Macy's house. He wanted, more than anything, to get out of the car and go and knock on the door. He couldn't get the strength. He couldn't stand the idea of the girl he loved slamming the door in his face. He had used her one too many times. He wanted to be with her, but he didn't want the obligation. He would always leave, deep in his heart he knew that. He knew it was unfair of him to go in there and tell her he would stay if he planned to leave. He needed Macy, but he would never stay. He needed Macy, but he didn't want to need Macy. He needed the love she showed him, but he didn't want to need it. He wanted to believe he had everything he needed in the WWE. He stared at the empty front porch, the furniture on it dusted with snow from the recent snow shower.
He shouldn't, he couldn't do that to her, He couldn't be that selfish. He couldn't use her again. He had to leave her alone. He pulled out his cell phone and dialed her number. She didn't answer the phone. He pulled away from the cub, and left Colorado. He would see her again, when he understood what he had to do.
-x-
Six months went by before Randy was back in Colorado. He hadn't spoken to Macy, he dreamed of her every night. He missed everything about her, her touch, her voice, her scent, the way her hair fell on her shoulders, her smile, her beautiful blue eyes. He had to see her, he needed her, he loved her, and he couldn't be without her. He drove to her house. He jumped out of the SUV. He took a deep breath. The sweet scent of summer filled his nostrils. He had to do this; he had to be a man. He needed Macy and if that meant commitment, than he had to do it. He walked up to the door and knocked.
A small woman with graying hair answered the door, there was a small boy hiding behind her leg, most likely her grandson. "Hello, can I help you?" She asked kindly.
"Hello, my name is Randy, Uh, is Macy Anderson here?"
The woman gave him a sympathetic look. "Are you are friend of Macy's Sir?"
"I was her boyfriend ma'am."
The woman shook her head "and no one has told you?"
"Macy and I had, a falling out, and were out of contact, where is she ma'am?" Randy felt his heart rate quicken. Was something wrong with Macy?
The older woman sent the young boy away than turned back to Randy. "I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this young man, but Macy is dead."
Randy couldn't breathe, who was this woman she must be insane. Macy couldn't be dead; it hadn't been that long since they had talked, just over six months.
"No, that can't be right ma'am you must be mistaken."
"I know this is hard young man, but, I am not mistaken, Miss Anderson died five months ago. "
"Five… five months ago." Randy stammered slightly shocked, that was just two weeks after the day he had decided not to go in and see her. "Why didn't I come see her—"
"I'm sorry sir, you had no way of knowing what would happen to Miss Anderson, don't blame yourself."
"I could have come and seen her, I was right there, and I just left, I could have seen her one last time, I could have taken her with me and she would still be alive."
"Son, don't say those things, you had no idea your friend would be in an accident. I'm really sorry for your loss"
Randy nodded. "uhm, yes, thanks for your help ma'am, I just, have to go." He turned before the lady could answer and got back in his SUV.
Macy was gone, and he had never fixed things, he had never done right by her, the woman he loved, and she died without him showing he loved her. He sped out of the driveway, and just drove, and drove.
-x-
Randy woke with a start. He had dreamed of her again. He had heard her voice, he was sure of it. Smelled her perfume, even felt her touch. He glanced out the window. It was almost dawn. He sat on the edge of the bed and held his head in his hands. He was going insane. It had been four months since he found out about Macy's death. He had found out she died in a car wreck, a three car pile-up, a drunk driver going through an intersection, ran a red light.
He groaned and stood up. He had since left work. He couldn't do it, he didn't have the same dedication, the same spirit, and he had no interest in being in the ring. There was no more adrenalin rush, no more high; everything just seemed empty, hollow and pointless.
He pulled on a pair of jeans and a coat, grabbed his car keys and left his apartment.
Fifteen minutes later he was in front of her grave. He knelt in the snow and ran his fingers over the headstone. He could still hear her voice; he heard it all the time. When the wind blew, he could smell her perfume. He could see her in his dreams or when he turned his head too quickly. He was alone. He had nothing and no one. He ran his fingers over her name and began to cry. "I'm sorry, I'm so Sorry Macy. I love you Macy, I will be with you soon" He knew he would see Macy again someday, he didn't know when, but he couldn't wait to see her again.