THE DESOLATION OF R.E
WARNING: this fan-fiction can be offensive to some readers PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED WITH RELIGIOUS MOCKING OR RACISM. This fan-fiction contains the work of five people utterly bored of an R.E revision lesson who, with only four days left of term, lost all faith in humanity.
All serious answers have been cut out for entertainment purposes.
ALL OF THESE ANSWERS WERE ACTUALLY WRITTEN DOWN.
1)
#doctor #nurse #teacher #priest #nun
if you are a catechist it means you love cats which is good cos cats are part of god's creation
get married cos god says so, or marry a disciple or sommit
2)
in the good Samaritan naught men hurt a man and it was pretend cos he wanted a free donkey ride
saint paul is one of the birds in the nursery rhyme. With the two little dicky birds sitting on a wall, one named peter one named PAUL fly away peter fly away PAUL come back peter come back PAUL.
Saint peter saw the…? And saw what the world would be like if we are mean to each other
Catechism #AWESOME!
3)
cos god says so
cos jesus says so
cos da bible says so
cos da homies in da church says so
cos of life
cos of hell
cos of heaven
cos of satan
cos me mam says so
cos !
birinus is fun cos they have birinus as a name and WTF is that ?!
different churches be talking without war-ing
4)
because they think jews need help because their noses are too big
saint paul had a ball and CC was Cinderella's nickname, so yeah
saint peter went mad once and started seeing illusions like wow #amen
the catechism says we should work for community cohesion, well probably, I haven't actually read it
5)
we must keep the Sabbath day holy and show yoda that the force can be used without a light saber
be like a teacher of god and stuff or sumit
6)
#friends
the catechism is big and awesome #lol
saint peter got really high and started trippin reall bad so he ended up in casualty with bust balls cos he dropped a bible on them
7)
cos SOME Christians read the bible and like a sam-ariton is well hip and "motro"
#saint paul was chillin' with his saint mates and sent a prank letter to some other kids
saint peter had a vision
he was later informed it was simply a dream, you know them things that everyone has
#no #frenemies
8)
by being friends we can all go off in the tardis with the doctor and kick some darlik butt cos they were mean #CUMBERBITCH 3
catholic schools now accept people of all races and religions because they only just got learned that racism was wrong
birinus is a latin group for latin people who speak latin
different churches believe different things like the Patagonians believe in worshiping sludge #don'tdiscriminatesludgelovers
9)
by making friends with all of the people
AT SCHOOL WE IS TAUGHT DIS STUFF
Birinus ? WTF?!
Different churches for crazy cat ladies that read the cat-a-kiss-em
10)
err – cos vodka makes people drunk so they think cats are people and kiss them - hence CAT A KISSED
hjkl jsg so that fgkhjj jhgff fghjkhgf ooiuyted and we are friends a;lskf iuewfh aeudhf different people odfbssd so kjsdh oehnwfed sdihf MAKE MORE BABIES.
Catholic schools force kids into R.E where they do crappy tasks and take the pi55 of stuff
Birinus – some holy thing
There are many different churches – I don't know why
11)
by having catholic schools like this one which doesn't actually teach about other religions and doesn't stop bullying and is homophobic so HOW is this even HELPING !?
Q – what do cremated priests say
A – why don't you biri-us ?!
We have different churches and my nanna says black people can sit outside
12)
the catechist – do holy things to stay holy … : P
don't be naught or injust cos god will burn you in a fire pitt of hell or somit
13)
#KEEPTHESABBATHDAYHOLY
14)
the #goodsamaritin was made up to force people to beat up and then help them #AMARZING
#swag # livingtheChristianlife # GODSQUAD
saint paul was a saint this means he probably did holy things, probably
please refer to bible #letsnot # rebel #totes
LOOKING BACK, WE ARE PROBABLY GOING TO HELL FOR WRITING THIS. WELL, WE HAD FUN ANYWAYS, IF YOU WERE OFFENDED, I TOLD YOU NOT TO READ IT EARLIER.