A/N: I'm still working on Trial by Error. Just took a break to write this One-shot. Blame ComicCon, Misha Collins, and tumblr for this.

An Innocent Man

"This is not a good idea, Sammy," Dean said. "I don't like it."

The bar had been Dean's idea, although he was already regretting it. They had gone on a successful hunt with Cas, another thing he hadn't been in favor of, and now they were relaxing. Sam thought he was being too overprotective, but Cas wasn't an angel anymore. He was a freaking baby in a trench coat. Of course, he hadn't voiced that opinion more than once. Cas had gotten very sensitive since losing his powers. Moping about the place, growling at everyone. It had taken them several weeks to even find him. Dean thought once they were all together again, things would be fine. They weren't.

He was outnumbered on letting Cas hunt. He'd finally agreed but only because it was a simple salt and burn.

He wasn't giving in on this.

"You took him to a brothel, Dean. Remember that?"

"Things are different now." He glared over at the couple at the nearby table. The woman was shamelessly throwing herself at Cas. Dean wanted to yank her away by her long blond hair. The former angel looked over at them, his expression unsure. That's what he loved… liked about Castiel. He was innocent, pure, untarnished by the slutty women throwing themselves at him. Dean was determined to keep it that way.

"How?"

"What?" Dean glanced over at his brother.

"How is this different? He's got all the crappy parts of being human. He might as well enjoy the good parts."

"No." He stood up, ignoring his brother's eye roll. Cas seemed almost relieved as he approached them. "Play time's over, honey. You're no longer needed. Get lost." In years past, he might have flirted with her some, smoothed over any ruffled feathers, but not now. He felt a burning anger at her, and she was lucky he was being this nice.

"Jerk." She glared at him as she walked away, ass swaying seductively.

"I don't think she's very happy with you, Dean," Castiel said.

"She can take it up with the complaint department. Not my problem."

When they were settled back at the table, Sam ordered more drinks. Dean sipped his slowly as he watched Cas down his in one gulp. Sam motioned to the bartender for more.

"Cas, don't you think you've had enough? I mean you can't drink like you used to."

"What are you, his mother?" Sam said.

He knew he was out of line from the way Sam was staring at him, but a sense of panic was eating away at him.

"He's never had a mother. But if he did, she would be telling him to slow down."

"Enough!"

Cas had their attention now, and he seemed pissed. "I can take care of myself. I don't need either of you telling me what I can and can't do." He emphasized his point by downing another shot, his eyes boring into Dean's, as he slammed the glass down.

"Fine, whatever. If that's what you want to do, I can't stop you. But I sure as hell ain't gonna watch you destroy yourself." He put his jacket on, yanking on the collar. His blood was boiling. He didn't even stop to consider why he was so angry. He just was.

"You're such a hypocrite, Dean Winchester. You've spent a lifetime of drinking too much and having sex with any woman you could find. Yet you bitch at me for trying to have a little fun."

"Not lately, Cas," he said, trying to calm down. "It's been a long time since I did any of those things."

"Well, I'm making up for lost time. I've only had a few months to mess up my life. Unlike you. It took you years to get this screwed up."

"Fuck you." He threw a few bills on the table. It was from the money they'd hustled earlier in the evening. Before everything went to hell. Cas returned his glare. Dean realized in that moment that he'd probably made everything ten times worse, but he didn't care. He was only trying to help the guy, but whatever. Sam just looked confused, staring at him like he was a monster he would do research on. No way would he figure this one out, though.

As Dean headed for their motel rooms, they had two now that Cas actually had to sleep, he thought about what he could break without having to clean up too much. Times really had changed.

Dean ended up not destroying anything. Instead he took a shower. It helped wash away some of his anguish and made it easier to pretend he wasn't crying. He was as determined as ever to stop Cas on his road to destruction, he just needed to think of a better way. Clearly what he was doing wasn't working.

He was still awake when he heard Sam came in, although he pretended to be asleep.

"You confuse me, Dean. I don't know what you want from me."

His words were slurred, but Dean could still tell it wasn't his brother standing by his bed.

He didn't feel ready to talk to Cas. He still felt too raw. Unfortunately his friend had other ideas.

"I know you're awake, asshat," he growled. "And you're going to talk to me."

Dean sighed. There was no way of avoiding it. "I'm sorry, Cas." He sat up, running his hand through his hair. "I know I was out of line. Let's just talk about it tomorrow, okay?"

"No. Now. Not brave enough tomorrow." He sat down next to Dean on the bed. "Why? Just wanna know why. You took me to a brothel…Before," he said waving his arms around. "Now you're pissed if I look at a girl."

"I can't do this right now. Seriously, tomorrow I'll explain it all. I just can't do this while you're drunk."

"But this is the only way I can do it," he said, grabbing Dean's arm. His other hand snaked around Dean's neck, pulling him in for a kiss. It was sloppy, inexperienced, and short. Cas tasted like rum and angel food-cake. That didn't make any sense but it was his first thought. He was too shocked to even think about kissing him back.

"I'm sorry, Dean," he said, the hurt in his voice mirrored on his face. "Ignore me. I'm drunk." He stumbled away from the bed, his head hanging down. "I'll go get Sam. Tell him he can have his room back."

He knew it wasn't a drunken mistake. Cas wanted to kiss him. Expected Dean to kiss him back. And if the arrangement with Sam was anything to go by, he thought they'd be together all night. Even though he hadn't had much to drink, it was a sobering thought. Cas expected them to sleep together. He wasn't sure how he even felt about that. One thing was for sure; he couldn't stand the look of pain on his friends face.

Dean was across the room before he made it to the door, stopping him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Cas, wait."

The look on the other man's face was distraught, with just a hint of hope. It tore Dean's heart out, but he couldn't give Cas what he wanted. "I'm sorry. We'll talk tomorrow."

"You don't have to worry, Dean," he said, suddenly sounding quite sober. "I'll leave you alone. And we don't need to talk about it. Ever."

As he left the room, Dean felt like crying all over again. When did he get to be such a girl? He curled back in bed, knowing that sleep was not happening any time soon.

Sam lumbered in shortly after. "What the hell, Dean?" he said loudly. Cas could probably hear him in the next room.

"Are we really going to do this now?" He rubbed his tired eyes.

"Yes we are. Seriously, you treat Castiel like he belongs to you or something. You mope around when he's gone and chase away everyone else who wants to get close to him."

"Are you talking about the girl? Because I'm pretty sure she wasn't looking for anything long term."

"The point is," Sam continued, "you act like you're jealous and then when Cas, who has been in love with you for like ever, finally admits his feelings, you reject him."

Dean stood up. If they were seriously going to have this conversation he needed to shorten the height gap between them. "There are so many things wrong with that sentence, and I don't just mean grammatically. One…" he held up his finger. "I was not jealous. Two… Cas is not in love with me. And three, he was drunk, Sam. He didn't know what he was doing."

"You're an idiot. I know I'm not completely sober, here, but I've thought this for a while. I can't freaking stand the sexual tension anymore. Just do each other already and get it over with. Preferably when I'm not around though." Sam ended his tirade by collapsing on his bed.

Dean stared at him with his mouth open. "You're insane," he said finally. "Completely insane." But Sam wasn't listening anymore. He was already fast asleep.

"Perfect," Dean mumbled, as he climbed back into bed. He was never going to get to sleep now.

Morning came abruptly. Stark and real, and Dean wanted nothing to do with it. In fact he wanted to erase the last 12 hours or so. He didn't want to face Cas and his questions or Sam and his accusations. Really, had the whole world gone mad? Maybe there was a spell or a curse to explain it.

As they cleaned up and went out for a late breakfast, Dean realized he needn't have worried. Both men were pretending last night hadn't happened. Instead of feeling relieved, he was irritated. Was all of last night alcohol induced or were they just trying to avoid dealing with it? It didn't matter. The cat was out of the bag. Pandora's Box and all that shit. They were the ones to bring it up. Now they could just deal with it. Well, maybe not Sam as much. Cas though… Cas wasn't getting off that easy.

And it had to be soon. They had a six hour car ride home. Some of this crap had to be resolved before that happened or it would be a long, uncomfortable trip.

"Can you pack up the car, Sam?"

"You're not going to help?" He sounded pissy, and Dean knew his hangover was partly to blame. He felt some satisfaction in his pain, since he'd been the one to get Cas drunk in the first place.

"I'm gonna put stuff, you let out, back in the box." At his confused look Dean added," I'm going to talk to Cas."

"Oh." Sam looked down. "I'm sorry, Dean…"

"Just pack the car."

Dean wasn't looking forward to this conversation, but he knew he had to tell Cas the truth. Something he could never talk to Sammy about.

The door was opened quickly at his knock. Almost as if he was expecting him.

"Dean. I'm almost ready." He walked back into the room leaving the door open.

Dean closed it, walking over to his friend. "We should talk."

"Nothing to talk about."

Dean sighed. "You kissed me."

"You didn't kiss back," Castiel said. "I think that says it all. Are we done?"

"No. Listen, I've been an ass lately."

"I'm aware." He continued his packing as if Dean wasn't following him around the room as he picked up his stuff.

"Dammit, Cas. Stop for a minute."

He stopped, glaring at Dean. The hurt was still there, and it broke his heart.

"I want to explain."

"No need, Dean," he said sounding sincere. "I thought you were jealous. I thought that's why you were acting so crazy. But that wasn't it, was it?"

Dean glanced away. The intensity of his stare was just too much. And he couldn't stand to see any more pain. "No. It wasn't jealously."

"See that wasn't so difficult. Now we're done."

"Don't you want to know why?"

"I don't know. Do I? Because if it's going to hurt as much as this does, I'm not sure I can take any more. Being human really sucks."

At least he was smiling. It was a half-smile full of pain but it was something.

"I don't think this will hurt, but I don't know that for sure."

Castiel pushed his duffle to the head of the bed and sat down. "Fine," he said. "Continue."

Dean sat down next to him, trying to figure out what to say. "Honestly, Cas, the drinking and the women scare me. It reminds me of the last time you were human."

"I've never been human, Dean."

That's right. Cas wouldn't remember it. "I mean in 2014."

"That's a year from now. What are you talking about?"

"Remember when Zachariah sent me to the future, to convince me to say yes to Michael?"

"Yes, I remember you mentioning it. I still don't understand."

"I didn't tell you everything, Cas. I just couldn't." At least he was looking at him now. There was no anger or hurt, just curiosity. Dean counted it as a win. For now.

"Why? Tell me, Dean."

"You were human, but you weren't handling it very well. You were drinking and taking drugs… pot, pills, anything you could get your hands on."

Cas nodded. "That explains your aversion to me drinking but the girl…"

"You had orgies. Sex with lots and lots of women. You seemed so broken, Cas. It felt like you were using those things to dull the pain of being human. I just can't stand the thought of that happening to you."

He was staring at him again, and Dean found he couldn't look away. "Do you really care that much?"

"Dammit, Cas. You know I do."

His head tilted and Dean had the distinct feeling he was being scrutinized.

"I see."

"Good."

"You're afraid…"

"Damn right I am."

"Afraid of corrupting me yourself."

"What? No," he said with a rising panic. "That's not…"

"Dean." He touched his cheek gently. "I understand now."

"No. You don't." He needed to leave. Get as far away as possible, but he felt like the fly stuck in a spider's web. If only those eyes weren't so blue.

"You don't want me?"

"Cas…"

"It's a simple enough question."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"That's not an answer."

"I'm sorry, I don't have an answer for you." He didn't know what else to say. He wasn't doing this. He couldn't.

"Let's try an experiment. I'm going to kiss you again, Dean. This time you will be prepared. I'm not drunk and neither are you. It's simple. You don't kiss me back, and I'll have my answer. I'll never bring it up again, okay?"

"What makes you so sure you're right?" He was stalling but he didn't know what else to do.

"Because, you… Dean Winchester… are noble. Always willing to give up what you need for others. And I for one, am not going to let you do it. Not this time."

"Cas…" His plea was cut off by the feel of soft lips on his. Unlike the night before, the kiss was slow. He could still feel the innocence in the kiss, and it just made him more determined to not respond. He couldn't be the one to teach him, the one to start his downfall into that life.

That didn't mean he didn't enjoy the kiss. What Cas lacked in experience he made up for in passion. His tongue pushed past Dean's lips easily as he delved further in. Dean held back a moan. He wanted him so much. His tongue ached to join in, to fight him for dominance. And just when he thought he couldn't take it anymore, Castiel pulled back. But instead of the expected look of pain, he wore one of triumph.

"You stubborn son of a bitch," he said. "Did you really think I'd give up that easily?"

"You said if I didn't respond…" And then he couldn't think because Cas was close, whispering in his ear.

"But you did respond," he said, moving his hand from Dean's face to his lap.

Dean knew what he was going to before he did it. The anticipation causing his problem to become even more apparent. As Cas cupped his hard cock straining against his jeans, Dean knew he was gone. His reaction was impossible to hide, and he wasn't sure he had the energy to fight anymore.

"I may not have much experience, Dean," he said, still rubbing, causing him to moan. "But I have watched the pizza man. It's been very educational. I learned how to touch a man, how to suck a dick, how to fuck…"

And as much as he wanted Castiel to remain innocent and pure, he couldn't help the reaction of his body at the way he was talking.

"Would you like me to show you what I've learned, Dean?" His voice had somehow reached an octave lower. Cas undid the button and zipper of his jeans, slipping his hand in to grip him hotly.

"Yes, please." He gave up all pretense. It was no use. He'd wanted Cas for so long. His body knew way before his mind caught up. Hell, his mind might never catch up. Tomorrow he may regret everything, feel ashamed for his weakness. But for now he was enjoying this.

"Then take off your pants. I want to see you."

Dean wasted no time getting naked. "Your turn," he said.

Cas took longer to get undressed, as if he wanted to savor this moment. Dean watching him intently, unable to look away as he shimmied out of this pants.

When he was finally done, Dean pulled him down with a growl. Finally kissing him like he deserved. Delving into his mouth expertly, causing him to moan. Their hands were everywhere touching what was previously forbidden. Cas panted as Dean sucked on his neck, not caring if marks were left.

"The pizza man doesn't know everything," Dean said, as he grabbed both of them in his hand, stroking them together. He started slow, increasing his speed as Cas fell apart, unable to make a coherent sound. Suddenly, he came all over their hands with a cry. Dean followed quickly, the look of ecstasy on Cas' face enough to put him over the edge.

Dean held on to him as he caught his breath, never wanting to let go. Afraid everything would now be awkward between them.

"I'm sorry, Dean."

"Are you kidding me?" He pulled back far enough to see his partner's face. Instead of happily blissed out, he looked sad. "What's wrong, Cas?"

"I wanted to do so much. We didn't even actually have intercourse."

Dean smiled, fondly. "It was your first time. We have plenty of time for that later."

"You mean we get to do this again?"

There was such hope in his eyes, that Dean was reminded of something Sam said. He was drunk at the time, but still maybe he was right.

"As much as you want, Cas." He kissed him lightly. "I love you. You get that right?"

"I think I'm beginning to. I love you, too, Dean. I have for a long time. I just didn't realize what it meant until I became human."

They snuggled some more, trading kisses… nothing too intense. Dean knew they had to leave before checkout time. Besides he wanted their next time to be in their home in his bed where they could take all the time they needed.

Once they were cleaned up and packed, Dean turned to Cas, pulling him into another kiss. "Sam's going to be insufferable about this," he said, finally.

"Yes, I believe he will be."

"Just remember," Dean said, opening the door. "I'm not the one who corrupted you."

"That's correct." Cas smiled as he shouldered his duffle bag. "It was the pizza man."