Author's Note: This story is rated "R" for language, drug use, sexual content, and mature/controversial themes (such as AIDS, homosexuality, poverty, etc). The characters in Harry Potter are the property of J.K. Rowling; the RENT libretto, music, and characters belong to Jonathan Larson. All other characters depicted in this story are fictitious. Any similarity to any person living or dead is merely coincidental. No copyright infringement intended. This story is purely fictional and fun. Please enjoy!
Also, I pretty much ignored the plots of Rowling's books, so Dumbledore, Sirius Black, and Cedric Diggory are still alive. Snape still teaches potions at Hogwarts, Fred and George are still students, and Voldemort is...hiding out in a cave in Afghanistan. (Just kidding on the last one). Please enjoy!
Harry Potter and the High School Musical
By SuperFantasic
Chapter I:
"Welcome to New York"
(A.k.a. Snape's on a Plane)
Albus Dumbledore leaned back in his seat with a contented sigh. He gently swirled the glass of Bordeaux in his hand and took a sip. He stared at the sea of clouds outside the small window as all of his worries and anxieties melted away.
"Life certainly is peaceful at thirty thousand feet in the air," he thought to himself with a little smile. Dumbledore was currently on his way to the centennial United Nations of Wizards conference, which was being held in New York this year.
The UNW was an organization founded by an international group of wizards and witches in the early part of the 20th century to promote unity and peace among the great wizarding nations of the world. They met annually in different cities around the world. Britain's representative was, of course, the Prime Minister of Magic. However, Cornelius Fudge was unable to attend this year due to pressing personal matters. Thus, he kindly asked his good friend and internationally-respected wizard, Dumbledore, to go in his stead. Dumbledore had quite happily agreed, as he had never been to New York, and thought it would be a nice vacation during Hogwarts' summer break. It was announced earlier in the year that, as part of the war against (Voldemort's) terrorism, new bills would be passed to promote Muggle tolerance and appreciation. Under the new Muggle-Acceptance laws, wizards and witches would be encouraged to experience Muggle lifestyles and technology, as well as live harmoniously with Muggles and Muggle-born wizards. To promote these new laws, the coordinators of the UNW had arranged for all conference attendees to travel to New York via Muggle transportation, and to stay in Muggle accommodations. Hence, Dumbledore found himself flying first-class onboard British Airways, sipping wine and enjoying the view, on his way to the States.
Dumbledore glanced at the man sitting next to him, who was none other than his trusty friend, Severus Snape. The invitation to the conference was for two, so Dumbledore—feeling that Snape desperately needed a vacation—kindly requested his company. At the moment, Snape was scowling his way through a copy of the in-flight magazine and muttering indistinguishably to himself. "He'll enjoy himself yet," Dumbledore thought. He picked up the magazine before him and flipped it open to the in-flight entertainment section. He had recently begun to appreciate Muggle cinema, and thought it would be a wonderful way to pass the time. Dumbledore scanned the descriptions of in-flight films and finally selected the "…charming and witty adaptation of Alan Bennett's play." It was smart and British, which was the way he liked things to be.
In no time, the British Airways Boeing 777 was touching down at JFK International Airport. After customs, Dumbledore and Snape made their way to the luggage carousels. They picked up their bags and proceeded to look around for transportation to the hotel. They spotted a man with a sign that read UNW and walked over to him. The man was muscular under a tattered military jacket. He was bald with dark brows and an unshaven face. He introduced himself as Travis, the Taxi Driver, and stared with piercing eyes at Dumbledore's peculiar appearance. He ushered them to a shiny black Lincoln town car and placed their luggage in the trunk.
"So, you guys British or somethin'?" he asked with a heavy Brooklyn accent, as he pulled onto the highway.
"Yes," Dumbledore answered politely, as Snape merely glared at the man.
"First time in the States?" Travis questioned.
"Yes," Dumbledore answered.
"Welcome to New Yawk fuckin' City!" Travis said, "you guys are gonna love it here. Trust me, ya won't wanna fuckin' leave." He let out a whoop, rolled down the windows and lit up a cigarette. Dumbledore leaned back and closed his eyes. Snape glared furiously first at Dumbledore for persuading him to come along, then at the taxi driver for being obnoxious and crass, and finally proceeded to scowl out the window at the approaching Manhattan skyline. They had just arrived, and Snape was already dreading the week ahead.
Travis weaved the car in and out of the rush-hour traffic, muttering an endless stream of expletives while alternately smoking, honking, and making rude hand gestures at other drivers. The traffic was barely crawling, as he impatiently maneuvered the car towards their final destination.
"Times Square is fuckin' crazy during rush-hour…muthafuckas don' fuckin' know how ta drive...fuckin' tourists everywhere…" Travis muttered as he drove up Broadway. Snape, who was staring out the window, blinked in surprise as they came upon the blinding neon lights of Times Square. Dumbledore looked out of his window at the bustling throngs of pedestrians weaving through the streets in the evening dusk. There were men selling food off of little carts, street musicians performing, tourists taking pictures, people talking on cell phones, vendors covertly trying to sell pirated handbags and DVDs… Dumbledore had never seen such energy and diversity all in one place. It was all so exciting! He could not wait to do some sightseeing.
After what seemed like hours, the car finally pulled up before the hotel.
"The W, Times Square, gentlemen," Travis announced with a flourish as he opened the passenger door. A uniformed valet immediately appeared and picked up their luggage as the doorman held the door.
"So, see ya tomorrow, bright an' early at 9:30," Travis said, consulting the itinerary provided by UNW.
"Yes, thank you very much. See you tomorrow," replied Dumbledore.
As Travis drove off, Dumbledore and Snape entered the elevator and rode up to the lobby. They exited and found themselves in a modern, rectangular space. The lighting was dim and warm. There was a bar in the corner and ambient music playing, as beautiful men and women talked and lounged on ivory leather chairs. Dumbledore and Snape couldn't help but feel a little self-conscious among all these chic, well-dressed people. They quickly made their way over to Reception, which was at the far end of the lobby. UNW had already arranged everything, and all Dumbledore really had to do was pick up the room key.
"You're in 3412, Mr. Dumbledore," said the concierge as he handed Dumbledore the keycard. Dumbledore stared for a moment at the card, then thanked the man and walked towards the elevators, followed by Snape. When they reached their room, both men stared at the door. There was no keyhole; instead, there was a black box with a slot at the top. Dumbledore figured the card should go into the slot and inserted it in. A red light blinked and the door remained shut. He looked quizzically at Snape, who shrugged wearily. Dumbledore tried again, and again, flipping the card in different directions. The door remained locked. Snape gave a loud, impatient sigh, pulled out his wand and muttered, "Alohomora." The light on the box turned green as the lock clicked. Dumbledore frowned at Snape as he marched into the room. The room was modern and minimalist like the rest of the hotel. The walls were slate and the bathroom was sectioned off with a frosted glass walls and a sliding door. Two twin beds stood against the wall, facing a large, flat-screen TV. A desk sat against large windows. A letter addressed to Dumbledore was on the desk.
"Dear honorable guest, welcome to the centennial UNW conference, held this year in New York City! We sincerely hope you will enjoy your stay with us…etc." The welcome letter was followed by an itinerary as well as a list of recommended restaurants, places to visit, and things to do in New York. Dumbledore looked over the itinerary. The UNW conference began at 10:00AM, followed by lunch, then "Free Time" for the rest of the day. The rest of the week looked the same, with a cocktail party here and a black-tie gala there.
"Lot's of free time for sightseeing, then!" Dumbledore thought happily. He ordered dinner for two and spent the rest of the evening ignoring Snape's attitude and playing with the TV remote.
SuperFantastic says: Did anyone catch the reference to Taxi Driver and The History Boys? (wink wink) Let me know what you think of the story so far!