Goodbye

By: Kibou32

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha.

A/N: My take on how Inuyasha would end.

Warnings: A lot of angst.

Inuyasha knew that even though he looked like he were fine and that nothing had happened to him, he was not. He knew he was one day and a half close to death. And perhaps when he finally let go he'd go to hell with Kikyou as he had promised her once, but he didn't care. He prayed to whatever god or gods would listen to the heartfelt wishes of a half – demon that he'd have time to make sense of what he wanted to say to each and everyone he knew once. Like his adopted kitsune Shippou for not being there as he would grow older or to the demon slayer Sango who had helped him so much to learn and to understand himself better. What words of wisdom could he impart to a perverted monk like Miroku? Or to Kaede who even though could've been closer to death due to old age, she would not be in peace if her sister's soul was not? Would he be able to say goodbye forever to Kagome? He hoped so. He knew without a doubt that he had proven to her that in the end he was a good soul that had only wanted the chance to live. Therefore he could tell that after patching up the injured and resting a bit, she'd say her good-byes and give him the completed shikon-no-tama to make a wish.

He looked up at the sky as they traveled away from the battlefield making their short way into the forest. They were at least a day away from the village, but he could tell that even as they made their wearied bodies to get some rest, they were satisfied nothing was wrong. That Naraku had perished and their inner pain was put to rest. He was sure that Sango felt even more peaceful than before as he could tell her aura shone a deep blue. He noticed that Miroku kept fingering the prayer beads that always clung to his left hand where the black hole used to be as if wondering if he were ready to assume his life now that the curse had been lifted. He sighed.

Once they were at the village, Sango left her weapon back at the hut and both she and Kagome left to the lake to bath. To this, Inuyasha vigilantly check them out from where he stood to make sure they were both safe as they walked away. Then he stole Kagome's big yellow bag and grabbed all he needed. He then proceeded to write a letter to each of his friends. It was his way of saying goodbye.

He didn't want them to cry when he died. Especially the young girl from the future. When he noticed that the ink on the "pen" failed he cursed softly and not knowing if he could handle being pushed to the ground just for asking a bit of ink, he decided to prick his finger and use his blood. At least it'd keep and not blur like any other ink.

When he finished with all the letters, he wrote one for Higurashi-san explaining his decision. He felt that he should explain her the situation and the reasons as to why he chose this path. He did not want to hurt her daughter. He did not want to hurt anyone. He would be missed he was sure, but he did not want them to mourn. He wanted them to live and this he expressed very clearly to each and every one he had written to in his letters. At last when he could hear that the splashing had stopped he stole Kagome's diary in an effort to keep her from remembering them. And then he put away each and every letter he had written so far and decided to return Kagome's backpack before she noticed it were gone.

-.-

It was early morning when he noticed that the dark hanyou's poison had eradicated all of his human blood. He estimated that by late afternoon, if not later he'd have passed away. He first had to finish with Kagome and the others before settling by Goshinboku's branches to write the last letter he would write before he died. To Sesshoumaru, the brother who would be coming for him tomorrow morning. He would leave Sesshoumaru the sword he had coveted all of these years since it came to his hand. He didn't want for Shippou to be attacked should Sesshoumaru suddenly change his mind that he of filthy kitsune blood should not carry an important sword as the Tetsusaiga.

"Inuyasha!!" – he heard Kagome's squeal just when she was coming through the thick forest. The sun glare caught in her hair giving her the appearance of a beautiful angel. He sighed even as he felt his heart tighten a bit. He felt like he could cry, but he dared not or else they would know and he didn't want them to be unhappy.

Behind her he could see the others coming at a much slower pace. He was sure she were about to say goodbye. It was time.

"Yes?" – he queried softly knowing he could not raise his voice unless he wanted them to notice his peril.

"We have spoken about this for many moons, my friend. Before the end of Naraku we decided that you would be the one to make the wish. We trust you to make the right decision." – he heard the monk say and he would've wanted then to snort. Yet he could not because even though he had intuited that he would be given the jewel to make a wish, he had not expected it really. He had hoped it would happen, but he was pleased with the trust they placed on him.

He smiled.

This he knew threw them off the loop because he rarely did so. But he knew that it was time to stop pretending. After all he did not have much time to waste in a mask.

"Here." – she said whilst she took off the prayer beads and he panicked for a bit thinking this would upset the balance in his weary body, but it did not help or it made it worst in the least.

"Make us proud Inuyasha." – he heard Sango say as she stepped forward and handed the pink jewel to him.

He instantly felt the change… Midoriko had been awaiting him for awhile. This he heard in his heart and he closed his eyes willing himself not to cry. The woman's voice echoed in his brain as she granted his self-less wish. For his friends to be happy and for Kagome to not mourn his death.

-.-

Kagome gave each of them a gift. She gave Shippou a hug and some stuff – crayons and paper to draw and color, pocky to eat and her photograph so that he wouldn't forget her. To Miroku she gave him a book that generated a deep blush and a laugh from the group of friends. To Sango she gave her a cute kimono that she had bought in the future. And Sango cried happy tears because she could see that the gift had cost Kagome a lot of her time and money to get it. And to Inuyasha she gave him a kiss.

"I love you Inuyasha. You will always remain in my heart." – She sobbed at the end and the others then decided to let her have her moment alone with him. Inuyasha thanked them from the bottom of his almost empty heart. It was only due to his youki that he was still with them and the sword's seal worked even if it sometimes pulsed softly to mourn his impending death.

"I want you to be happy Kagome and please do not dwell on the past. I will always be there for you when you need me… even if I'm not physically there, you know we have a bond. And that bond will not be broken so easily." – and then he hugged her fiercely to him.

He could no longer hear anyone else and Kagome's sobs gradually disappeared from his hearing although he could tell that she was still weeping softly. It made him sad to realize that as soon as she stepped into the well, she would forget him and he would never see her again. He hoped though that she would think of him whenever she were in trouble and couldn't make up her mind to make an important decision… even if she no longer remembered him for himself… she should be able to remember him for what he used to be… a true friend.

-.-

Miroku brought him dinner and he graciously accepted although he felt he could no longer eat it. His eyes had dimmed a bit and he was glad for the night's shadows because they hid his condition to his friend. Around midnight as he composed his last letter, he felt the company of Kirara and he smiled. She knew he would not survive come morning and she had come to make sure that no one bothered him whilst he took care of the last thing before he died. As the morning rays came and he felt the cold overcome him, he thought of his mother and hoped that he could see her before he died. He had not gone to visit her grave in weeks, but he was sure she wouldn't hold it against him.

-.-

Kirara made Miroku walk with her to Goshinboku. He had been hoping to sleep an hour more, but she was insistent and he couldn't stop to tell her no.

"Inuyasha!!" – he called when he noticed that they were heading towards the God tree. And found him laying on the soft ground.

At first he thought he were asleep but as he knelt to touch his head, he felt the cold. He cried. He yelled for help and was sure it was for naught, Inuyasha was gone and without Sesshoumaru's sword of healing, he had no hope in reviving his friend. He cursed the thought that he had not even noticed the state he were in, why had he not made him come into the hut to fare off the bitter cold of the night? He wondered what could he have done to make him be alive this morning… came up with no clue as how to explain this to the young kitsune who instantly barged into clearing and bawled.

-.-

"We have to bury him Shippou." – Sango said to him.

"NO!!" – He went on crying and then he felt it. As he were hugging him, he felt a lump. He hoped – although he knew it were futile – that it were like Kagome's story of Snow White. But it was not as he uncovered the bound diary.

They gasped.

Kaede took it from him and she said…

"'Tis from Kagome… I can tell. I now know what was Inuyasha's pure wish. He wished for yer happiness despite the fact that he knew he were dying." – she felt the treacherous beginnings of tears welling up in her old eye and tried to stave them off. She had to be strong.

"There are letters in here." – Sango gasped.

"One for each of us?" – Shippou asked.

"Yes. There is one another but… I think this is for Sesshoumaru." – Miroku tremulously said also trying to stave off the tears.

"We should then keep the fang and the letter and wait for the tai-youkai to come pick them up. He would know Inuyasha is dead." – Kaede stated.

"And Inuyasha's body?" – Shippou whimpered.

"We have to burn it. No one should try to use his body for evil like Kikyou-sama's. Many would use it for their own selfish reasons and we cannot let that happen. Inuyasha was an honorable youth. Do the rites of passage so no one will try to use his ashes to build him a body made of clay like they did for Kikyou or the Band of Seven. We cannot allow anything to happen to him that he should not want for it to do so. Therefore we should let him have the funeral he deserved." – they all nodded in agreement at Kaede's words.

-.-

It was late evening two weeks after Inuyasha had died when Sesshoumaru stepped into the clearing that housed the Old Eater's Bone Well. Something had told him that there was something wrong with his sibling, but he could not tell what. He had rushed his meeting with his brother as quickly as he possibly could, but in the end he knew without a doubt that he were too late. There was a stone grave marker that simply said Inuyasha.

He sniffed carefully and could tell that his ashes were buried here. There were flowers surrounding the grave, but he couldn't tell when had they been planted in the soil.

"Sesshoumaru-sama?" – he heard the timid voice of the kitsune that used to accompany his brother's pack.

He turned to see him holding Inuyasha's katana and some sort of letter. He was sure they were for him. He knelt on his knee and grabbed the letter from the trembling paw of the youngster in front of him.

"This Sesshoumaru o kinodoku ni omou for not being here." – he whispered softly turning his eyes to the grave in front of him.

And then he turned and left wishing he had been there but hoping that someday he'd meet his brother's reincarnation. Someday he'd have the chance to tell him he were sorry. Perchance he'd be able to also reincarnate if he would not meet him before he died and be able to meet and cherish the hanyou as he was wont to do so. Perhaps...