Disclaimer: All I own is the story...I don't own the characters or anything relating to them. They belong to JK Rowling. I won't own Harry Potter and I never will.

Harry Potter and The 30 Tasks

Chapter 1

A Trip to the Ministry of Magic

A/N: This idea was inspired when I was at Chestnut Ridge Park sitting on a swing on a swingset there. You'll see why in Task Number three.

"Oy, Harry! Watch out for that bludger!" Fred Weasley shook his head sadly. "Poor chap." Harry had been knocked off of his broom by a large, black, seemingly alive ball. He was visiting the Weasleys for a month during the summer between his sixth and seventh years at Hogwarts, and was glad to get away of the Dursleys for a month. The more Harry thought about it, the shorter the period of time became until he had to go back to them. Now 17, Harry enjoyed teasing and poking fun at his cousin, because firstly, his cousin, Dudley was a dirty git, Harry was older, and Dudley was becoming increasingly more frightened of him, which made it easy. He fell about ten feet onto his back, his broom following him, and landing across his stomach, which made him twitch. He kept his eyes closed for a little while, then opened them and looked up. The bludger had hit him hard in the face, leaving him with a bloody nose and a large white jagged line across his left lens in his glasses, which was unmistakably a crack. Hermione looked up from the book that she was reading and frowned.

"Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Now, I told those boys to be careful out there and to not play Quidditch with the bludgers. But, did they listen? Of course not." Mrs. Weasley shook her head.

"Uncle Herb bought them that new Quidditch set for Christmas 2 years ago and I hid it. Fred and George found it of course. They have to get into everything." Ron had helped Harry up and brought him into the house for Mrs. Weasley to take care of. She got a cloth from a hook, and her wand from her pocket.

"You might want to close your eyes, dear. And, tilt your head back." Harry did as he was told, and Mrs Weasley took her wand, pointed it up his nose, and squirted water into it. His reaction came immediately, and he jumped back and began coughing. Mrs. Weasley brought him back to her, and wiped off his nose.
"Ron, can you go get the little clear bottle from the cabinet please?" Ron nodded, went upstairs, and came back downstairs with a small, corked glass bottle. He handed it to his mom, who uncorked the bottle, and poured a tiny drop down Harry's nose. He felt a warm sensation fill it up...a feeling that he had only felt once before. Second year in the Chamber of Secrets.

"What is that stuff?" he asked, wiping the water and the clear substance off of his nose. Both had mixed together to make a salty concoction that made his upper lip burn.

"Phoenix tears. They have - "

"Healing powers." He smiled, realizing, "I know." Mrs. Weasley smiled back, pat him on the cheek, and walked into the living room. Ron followed. Harry followed him.

"Don't you remember, mum? Second year? When Harry went into the Chamber of Secrets?"

"Yes, yes, yes. I know all about it. Now, the both of you go find something to do that won't get you hurt. Your father should be home from work soon. He might take you out. But, until he gets home, find something to do. I have laundry and dishes and Merlin knows what else. The work never ends, even if you are using magic." She stalked off up the stairs, and Hermione came in through the back door, her thick hard cover novel under her arm.

"Fred and George packing up?" asked Ron, turning to Hermione. She nodded and went to Harry. She looked him over, then pointed her wand at his glasses and made the large crack disappear. They smiled at each other, and Harry said, "Thanks." Hermione nodded as if to say, "You're welcome," and Ron grimaced. He didn't like at all when Harry got more attention from Hermione than he did.

"Well, you heard my mum, Harry. Let's go find something to do until Dad gets home." The three were almost magnetically pulled to Fred and George in the backyard. They were struggling to catch the bludgers that were angrily zooming around over their heads. One flew into Ron's stomach and he doubled over. He clutched the ball tight in his hands and handed it off quickly to George, who chained it down in the box. Neville Longbottom, Seamus Finnigan, Dean Thomas and the infamous Luna Lovegood were sitting around on the lawn. They had joined in on the Quidditch game. Fred, George, Ron, and Harry had been on one team, and Neville, Seamus, Luna, and Dean had been on the other team. Neville, Seamus, Fred, and Ron were chasers, George and Luna were keepers, and Harry and Dean were seekers.

"If she won't let us play with bludgers, next time, she probably will tell us not to use the snitch," said George.

"Let's see...that leaves us with a keeper and 3 chasers for each team," said Fred, juggling the quaffle. He rolled his eyes and bent down to put the large red dented ball into the box. "That doesn't make Quidditch very fun, now does it?" Harry smiled a little. Hermione looked behind her past the house, and saw a car come up the drive.

"Mr. Weasley's home," she said, "Come on." She, Ron, and Harry headed to the front of the house and waited for Ron's dad to turn off the car, and get out of it.

"Hello!" he said happily when he did. He pat Ron on the shoulder, and told the three to follow him into the house.

"Hello, Molly," he said giving his wife a hug and kiss. The large grandfather clock ticked, and Mr. Weasley's picture went to: 'Home'.

"Hello dear," she said squeezing him back. She let go, then looked at Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

"These three are bored."

"Are they?" he asked skeptically, eyeing them.

"Yes they are."

"Well, I'm only home for lunch, then I have to go back to work."

"Why don't you take them to the Ministry with you?"

"Really?"

"Yes! You can give them another tour. That should keep them occupied." Arthur looked at the three 17 year old Gryffindors and smiled a little.

"Allright, I think that could be in order. Lunch first, though. What did you cook, Molly?"

"Well, I cooked a rather large lunch. Ron's got a few more friends over. There's turkey in the oven."

"Turkey! Well! When are we going to eat, then?"

"Very, very soon. Ron, will you call the others in?" Ron nodded, and went to the back door.

"LUNCH!" he called. The others came in and sat themselves at the long table in the kitchen. Mrs. Weasley set the large turkey onto the table and a tornado of hands flashed at it. Harry blinked when he saw what was left - just a mass of bones and a bit of meat. He looked around the table to see who had taken the most. When he saw, Mrs. Weasley noticed as well. She smacked Ron on the back of his head, clearly glad that it was her son, so she could do so.

"What's the matter with you? Remember sharing? I taught you it at two! Give Harry half of that!" Ron frowned up at his mum, and dug his fork into the turkey before him. Harry picked up his plate, and moved it towards Ron's, who gave Harry some turkey. Conversation at the table was slow. Dean and Seamus were in a heavy conversation about Quidditch, when Luna and Neville were both staring at each other, each waiting for the other to say something. Luna forced a smile, and Neville blushed a slight bit. She frowned, picked up her latest copy of the Quibbler from the floor beside her chair, and buried her face into it. She obviously did not like it that Neville fancied her. After lunch, the table cleared just as fast as it had filled. Fred and George went to their Joke Shop, and Luna, Dean,Seamus, and Dean began a board game. Mr. Weasley stood up and smiled at Harry, Ron, and Hermione. They smiled, and got up from the table, happy do finally do something.

"I'll be going back to work then, Molly," he said to his wife, "and I'll be taking these three with me."

"Allright, Arthur." She kissed him on the cheek and began picking up the plates from the table.

"I'll see you later."

"Bye." And with that, he led the three to the car, got in, and began driving.

"So, Harry...have a good day today?"

"Erm..."

"He got clocked by a bludger while playing Quidditch and got himself a bloody nose," said Ron, smirking.

"I wouldn't put it that way," said Hermione.

"Well how would you put it?"

"Not like that. That makes you sound more like Rita Skeeter," said Hermione, frowning. It was amazing that the two could actually argue over something as pointless as that, even at the age of 17. After a while, the car pulled up to the Ministry, and the four got out of it. They walked through large doors and they were all soon on the floor of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, and at the door of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts office. Mr. Weasley opened the door, as a few things fell out. He realized that it was impossible for all four to fit comfortably, so he turned to them and sighed.

"Now, I'm going to trust you to be responsible. You can walk around, as long as you don't get into any trouble. Allright? I don't want any reports to come into my office about three 17 year olds blowing up half of the building." The three smiled a bit and nodded.

"Thanks, Dad," said Ron. They walked away from the tiny office and went to the lift.

"Please be careful..." said Arthur to himself, shaking his head, and disappearing into his office. The lift came to their floor, and four older wizards stepped out, saying hello to Harry, Ron, and Hermione as they passed. Once they were gone, the three stepped into the lift and looked at all of the buttons, and a piece of parchment on the wall indicating where everything was in the building.

"So? Where should we go?" asked Ron, excitedly. Harry pointed to the Department of Magical Transportation

"What's there?" he asked. Ron narrowed his eyes in thought.

"Well, the Floo Regulation Panel...they monitor fireplaces and decide which fireplaces are connected to the network. Then there's the people who work on the Ministry Cars. And the people who monitor apparating areas...and the portkeys. They make portkeys and dispose of used ones...or reuse them."

"Why don't we...test...some of the used portkeys?" said Harry mischeviously. Ron brightened.

"Allright! We can always get back! I don't think that will do any harm." He looked at Hermione. She shrugged.

"As long as we can get back," she said, "I'll do that."

"Yesss...awesome," said Ron, "Here we go, then!" he pressed the button for the Department of Magical Transportation and they felt the lift lurch and bring them up to the corresponding floor. A bell rung and the doors opened. They walked out and looked around.
"There!" exclaimed Ron, his arm outstretched, and his finger pointed in the direction of a door labeled 'Portkey Office'. They scampered to the door, looked around, and Ron turned the handle to open the door. Luckily, the room was vacant, and the lights dim. Ron rushed his other two friends in before he himself went in, looked around again, and went in. He closed and locked the door behind him and went over to where Harry and Hermione had found themselves. They were near a row of shelves, where a ton of useless items sat. Hermione picked up a tuna can. "Let's see where this one goes," she said. Harry and Ron nodded and held onto the other sides of the can.

"One...Two...Three," they said together. Harry looked around the room for a last time and felt the familiar sensation of his navel being pulled to his spine, and his feet being lifted off the floor. The more he thought about it, the more he didn't want to go through the same thing repeatedly, while testing the objects in the room. Soon, relief surfaced, and he felt his feet slam to the ground.

"Ha. We're in the Three Broomsticks," said Ron, looking around at the pub. It was packed, witches and wizards were all over the room, laughing, talking, arguing.

"I guess this would be useful if someone wanted a strong firewhiskey after something stressful..." said Harry, thinking.

"Come on, let's go back," said Hermione, "There's nothing to do here." The three took their portkey back to the Portkey Office, and Harry set the tuna can back to the place that it had sat. Hermione walked up and down rows and rows of shelving, when she oohed. Ron and Harry walked over to her, and looked at a small treasure chest, which had 3 locks on them. She removed her wand from her pocket and held it in front of one.

"Alohomora," she said, hoping something might happen, and something did. A small snake crawled out of the keyhhole and hissed something.

"Well that helps," said Ron. Harry looked at it.

"Can you repeat that?" he asked it. Ron and Hermione looked at him as his voice was not his own...but a hissing sound familiar to the snake's. He was speaking to it in Parseltongue, snake language. The snake repeated what it had said, and what Harry heard was a riddle.

"What did it say?" asked Ron, excitedly.

"it said...Four friends were competing in a swimming competition. Only one person wore the same number as the position they finished. Gary, who didn't wear green, beat Barry. Larry beat the person who wore yellow. The person who wore number 3, wore green. The person who wore number 2 finished first whereas Terry came last. The person who finished second wore green, Barry wore yellow and the person wearing red beat the person wearing blue. I think that was it." Ron looked completely dumbfounded and looked at Hermione. She seemed to be pondering the puzzle in her mind. She asked Harry to repeat it, and he did.

"Well...Terry was last...so she was number four. She wore the number four and wore blue...because the person wearing red beat the person wearing blue. Hm. Barry wore yellow...and was number three...because Gary beat him...who was either first or second."

"Larry was green...he wore number three," said Ron, "and finished second."

"Right," said Hermione. She thought about it for a longer time, and then smiled. I have it. She looked at Harry and told him what to say.

"Gary finished first, wore number two, and wore the color red." Harry repeated the phrase to the snake, who nodded.

"Larry finished second, wore the number three, and wore green." Harry again ehoed the phrase.

"Barry finished third, wore the number one, and wore yellow, and Terry finished fourth, wore the number four, and wore blue." Harry said the same to the small green snake, who nodded, and disappeared back into its keyhole. A small green light turned on on the hole and stayed lit. The three cheered and Hermione proceeded to the next lock, and again tried the unlocking spell on it. Another snake came out. This one was red, with purple spots, and hissed another riddle. Harry repeated, "During a police investigation, an inspector interviewed five villains to try to identify who robbed a bank. Arnold stated that it wasn't Edward, but it was Brian. Brain stated that it wasn't Charlie, and wasn't Edward. Charlie stated that it wasn't Edward, and it wasn't Arnold. Derek stated that it was both Charlie, and Brian. Edward stated that it was Derek, and wasn't Arnold. If each suspect told exactly one lie, who robbed the bank?" The three stood in silence for a while. Ron looked at Hermione, who was deep in thought.

"Was it Arnold?" she asked hopelessly.

"You don't know?" asked Ron. Hermione shook her head. She looked at Harry and told him to ask how many guesses that they have. Harry did so, and reported that the snake had hissed two guesses.

"I bet we had three on the first one," said Ron.

"Which means we have only one on the last one," said Harry, understanding. Hermione nodded.

"Ask it if it's Arnold," she said. When Harry asked, the snake shook his head and told them they had one more guess and if they got it wrong, they had one chance to get it right. Hermione thought for a moment and told Harry to tell the snake that it was Charlie. The snake nodded, and slithered back into the keyhole, and a green light flashed on.

"One more," said Ron excitedly. A jet black snake came out of the last keyhole and hissed a riddle. Harry furrowed his brow when he heard it.
"Two policemen walked into a room with no windows and found a dead man who obviously hung himself from the ceiling, though they couldn't figure out how. There was no chair beneath him that he might have jumped off of, or a table. Just a puddle of water. How did he do it?" Hermione looked at Ron.

"A puddle of water," he said, thinking. He brightened. "Oh, I know this one. My dad told me this a few years ago. He tied a rope around his neck and stood on a block of ice until it had melted and he had successfully hung himself!"

"Good, Ron!" exclaimed Harry. He told the snake, who went back into the keyhole, and turned on the last green light.

"You do the honors, Ron," said Hermione. Ron smiled, nodded and put his hand on the top of the small chest. He opened it carefully, revealing a glass ball. It was hollowed out in the middle, and the glass was as thin as paper. Hermione picked it up, and held it in her palm. It was completely weightless.

"Allright," she said, "Carefully grab hold of this. It looks like it's going to break." The two boys did so, and the three looked at each other, smiling.
"One...Two...Three..." the portkey dragged them backwards and they all fell on each other in a heap, the glass ball slipping unironically from their hands. it fell to the ground they were on and shattered. Ron cursed, and Hermione glared at him. Harry was on bottom, and swore that his spine was going to collapse.

"Get off, get off, get off!" he protested. Hermione got off of Ron, and Ron off of Harry. Ron stumbled back, and fell into a wooden board, hitting his head.

"Ow!"
The area was completely dark, and seemingly open. Hermione pulled out her wand again.

"Lumos," she said. Her tip lit up, and she pointed it at Ron, who was in front of a large sign with writing on it.

"Move, Ron," she said. He looked at what he was leaning against, and moved away from it. Hermione and Harry moved closer to the sign. Harry looked it over, then announced,

"The Thirty Tasks of Gregory Delmore."

A/N: Thanks to for two of the three chest-opening riddles. The other one is from Thank you! I'll need a bunch more for proceeding chapters...as you will find out in chapter two. If anyone has any riddles, PLEASE EMAIL THEM TO ME OR TELL ME SO IN REVIEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!! (clears throat) I'm okay. But please...PLEASE tell me if you have any good riddles. I'll be asking something else of you soon...and you will also see in chapter 2. (winks) I'm trying not to give anything away.