Disclaimer - I own nothing of Wicked or the song If I Can't Love Her. Both belong to their respected owners. 'Nuff said.
Italics are song lyrics and thoughts.
A/N: I got this idea while listening to my Beauty and the Beast: The Broadway Musical soundtrack.
Summary: AU: Fiyero loves Glinda, maybe a little bit too much, but when he falls in love with another girl, his feelings for her grow. But when the girl is suddenly killed, Fiyero must learn to move on. F/G, F/OC. Musical based. Based on the song If I Can't Love Her from the Broadway musical, Beauty and the Beast.
Genre: General
Rating: T
Fiyero Tiggular looked out the window of his castle. Birds were singing and it was a beautiful spring morning. It had been three weeks since Elphaba had been melted. He felt like his heart had been melted as well.
Sighing, he walked out of his room and down the stone steps to the garden. He was sure that Elphaba would've loved his castle. He returned to his castle in Wilkie Country shortly after Elphaba had been melted. He was never returning to Shiz, no matter how much Madame Morrible begged him. He had affairs of state to attend to - not to mention finding a wife.
In the garden, his thoughts went from Elphaba to Glinda. He hadn't seen Glinda in a long time. He thought that she would never love him - not after he was seeing Elphaba behind her back.
"And in my twisted face
There's not the slightest trace
Of anything that even hints of kindness
And from my tortured shape
No comfort, no escape
I see, but deep within is utter blindness." Fiyero sang, feeling tears sting his eyes. Wiping them away with the back of his hand, he continued to walk around the garden.
The clouds above him burst open and rain covered the ground. Fiyero put his arms over his head and rushed inside. Closing the door behind him, he went to the drawing room and pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill from the desk drawer. Getting his ink out, he dipped the quill point in it and held it over the parchment.
"Hopeless
As my dream dies
As the time flies
Love a lost illusion
Helpless
Unforgiven
Cold and driven
To this sad conclusion." Fiyero crooned as he wrote his letter to Glinda. He didn't really know what to say to her, so he poured out his feelings - saying how much he loved her and he hoped that she loved him too.
An hour later, he was sitting in front of the fire when his butler handed him an envelope. Fiyero smiled and opened the envelope. Inside was a letter written in pink ink - Glinda's handwriting. She told him that she was in love with another man and was planning on marrying him, hoping that Fiyero would understand.
"No beauty could move me
No goodness improve me
No power on earth, if I can't love her
No passion could reach me
No lesson could teach me
How I could have love her and made her love me too
If I can't love her, then who?" Fiyero sang, half angry. He wanted Glinda, no matter how much it hurt to get her back.
Two days later, he was out walking in the city when he saw a young girl crying in an alleyway. Fiyero rushed to her and saw that she had deep wounds on her face and hands. Brushing her long black hair behind her face, he saw that she had beautiful brown eyes and fair skin. Fiyero took her in his arms and took her back to his castle.
When the girl was cleaned up, she told Fiyero her name was Sara and that she was from a small village in the east. She was in the city to get food for herself - she lived alone.
Fiyero offered Sara his extra room toward the back of the castle for the night. Sara smiled and thanked him, her long black cloak billowing behind her.
"Long ago I should have seen
All the things I could have been
Careless and unthinking, I moved onward." Fiyero whispered, walking to his room on the other side of the castle.
As the days passed, Fiyero became more attached to Sara - hoping that someday she would be his bride. He started thinking of ways to propose to her - moonlit picnic, a long walk in the city, going to the square in the Emerald City and proposing to her in front of the large fountain. The last one seemed perfect.
A week later, Sara and Fiyero were in Fiyero's carriage headed to the Emerald City. Sara, Fiyero found out, had always wanted to go to the Emerald City, but had never been. Fiyero smiled and told her she would love it.
"You look familiar - did you go to Shiz?" Fiyero asked. Sara smiled and nodded - she told Fiyero she had been in Dr. Dillamond's class the same year that he, Glinda and Elphaba had been at Shiz.
He asked Sara to be his bride as soon as they reached the fountain in Emerald City Square. Sara smiled and threw her arms around Fiyero's neck. Fiyero couldn't have been more happier than he was right there.
Suddenly, tragedy struck Fiyero's heart - his beloved Sara had been out riding on her horse when the animal spooked and threw her. Sara hit her head on a rock and was killed instantly. Fiyero cried for a week, not eating and not sleeping. He wept that he would never marry and that the three women he had loved were either dead or going to marry someone else.
He decided to sing a song at Sara's funeral called If I Can't Love Her. When he reached the final verse, he couldn't hold his tears in and they rolled down his cheeks. Sara's mother wrapped an arm around Fiyero's shoulders and drew him close to her, comforting him.
"No pain could be deeper
No life could be cheaper
No point anymore, if I can't love her
No spirit could win me
No hope left within me
Hope I could have loved her and that she'd set me free
But it's not to be
If I can't love her
Let the world be done with me." Fiyero sang as he rode his horse back to his castle. Once or twice, he thought about throwing himself from the horse, killing himself, but Fiyero knew that wasn't the answer.
Sara and Elphaba looked down from heaven at the man that they once loved.
"Sara, you should go back to Fiyero and marry him." Elphaba told her. Sara shook her head.
"Elphie, don't be silly - it's you who should go. You've known him longer than I have." Sara said, brushing the tears out of her eyes.
"If that was even possible to go back to Fiyero, we couldn't do it." a voice came from behind them. Sara turned around to see a young woman with auburn hair and a smile on her face look at them.
"What would you know about it, Nessa?" Elphaba snapped, not taking her eyes off Fiyero.
"I'm just telling you that it's not possible to go back to Fiyero. Once you die, you're stuck up here forever." Nessarose explained, stepping closer to where Sara and Elphaba were standing.
"I know, but I would love to have him hold me in his arms one last time." Sara said, closing her eyes. She could see Fiyero's golden hair in the moonlight, his muscled abs glistening in the candlelight. She could feel him kiss her a thousand times all over her body.
"No pain could be deeper
No life could be cheaper
No point anymore, if I can't love him
No spirit could win me
No hope left within me
Hope I could have loved him and that he'd set me free
But it's not to be
If I can't love him
Let the world be done with me." Sara sang, her voice echoing through heaven like a heavenly song.