It was late at night when the decision was made, Ares, Hermes and Apollo would have to choose wives. Originally Hephaestus only brought up this solution for Ares. He was tired of his wife running around with him for all this time. Then Hera, being the marriage goddess that she is, added Hermes and Apollo to the list.

Naturally there was an uproar at these suggestions. These gods had been bachelors for millennia; many and varied short term affairs, but nothing permanent. This would mean that hopping from woman to woman would be slightly difficult and slightly awkward (only slightly).

Hera argued that they had had plenty of time to sow their wild oats (and they did sow many) and now they had to pay up to her standing as the marriage goddess and get a wife.

"There are plenty of minor goddesses around here and all of them would be happy to marry any one of you. I don't care who just do it!"

Apollo argued "I'm not going to be there for any wife most of the time, I've got a big daily commute."

"Bring her with you." Chimed in Demeter.

Apollo looked at her. "Go grow a flower."

"Real men don't shine." (ha ha anyone get that? Hmm? Hmmm?)

"I shine because I'm hot."

"Not as hot as me." Ares shot.

"Yeah… hot-headed."

"Shut up Artemis!" Aphrodite threw in.

"Right back at you Bobble head."

Aphrodite tried to launch herself at Artemis but Dionysius' grapevine drew her towards her husband.

"We wouldn't even be having this meeting if you stayed faithful to your husband." He shoved the vine towards Hephaestus. As she complained.

"I didn't even choose him."

"When have I ever harmed you?"

"You invited everyone to see Ares and me in a net!"

"Key words: Ares and you."

"So?"

"So, I stopped really noticing just you a long time ago." Hephaestus said in his gruff and now slightly angry voice.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"To me you're just a cheating wife."

"How dare you-!"

Meanwhile

"I'm always somewhere else; I'm never going to have time to take care of a wife. And don't give me any of that take her with you crap, I'm also the god of thieves I help some seedy but not too morally incorrect stuff go down. It would be like finding out that you married an assassin" Hermes looked up to a lot of blank stares. "I haven't helped any of that kind of thing go down." He said in a bored and rehearsed voice.

"But we know that you take some time off."

"Only when I'm trying to get a kid conceived dad."

"You can do that with a wife then."

"Really Poseidon? Was that necessary?"

"ENOUGH!" Athena had been silent through all these arguments "It's obvious that these oafs will never be happy with having wives. So I suggest that instead of potentially ruining some aspect of the Earth by marrying a minor goddess, then still having many other relationships, they should find a mortal, to be married to for all eternity."

"The only problem with that Athena is that, well, they're mortal."

"I'm aware Aphrodite."

"Then how are these bachelors going to be married to them forever."

"Our Lady Hera will give the vows then our Lord Zeus will grant them eternal youth."

"This sounds a lot like how Araidne became immortal with me."

"Yes, and…?"

"Nothing, just saying."

"So we head down to some mortal area, find a girl, prove to them we're gods and marry them."

"Only three out of the four, Apollo." Hera interjected.

"What? Do we just make some chick appear then marry them?"

"One out of two Ares." Artemis said, catching on.

"I don't get it."

"Simple Hermes," Began Demeter "You go to a mortal area…"

"Find a girl." Added Hera

"Pursue them." Poseidon yawned.

"Then marry them." Completed Zeus.

"If they so choose." Athena amended.

"What do you mean 'If they so choose'"

"Easy, Ares, you're not going to tell them you're gods. If you ask them to marry you and they refuse, you'll have to start all over with a different mortal."

"WHAT!" The three gods shouted simultaneously.

"You heard her." Dionysius grinned.

"All right now that we have the terms set down it's time to make it official. Ares, Hermes, Apollo, stand before Lady Hera and I."

The gods of war, travelers, and the sun obeyed their father and knelt in front of him.

"Swear, by the River Styx, that you will go to a mortal area, choose a girl to marry, court her and not tell her you are gods."

"We swear by the River Styx."

"Further swear that should you fail with one girl you will find another lady to marry, court them and not tell them you are gods for as long as this cycle takes."

"We swear by the river Styx."

"Good, go."

"Father?"

"Now what?"

"Should we tell them we're gods after we're married?"

"Well…"

"Of course," Hera interjected "It would be unfair to the girls to be lied to forever."

"Alright Hera."

After they had left there were quite a few side conversations, the most important was between Zeus and Aphrodite.

"It's your turn to give me an oath."

"What?"

"Swear on the River Styx that you will, in no way, interfere with Ares', Apollo's or Hermes' endeavors, unless I give you permission to do so."

"No!"

"Aphrodite." The whole room shook and everyone looked over.

With her eyes narrowed she spoke. "I swear on the River Styx."