AN: This is not my first Harry Potter fanfic, so please criticize me all you want, I sure deserve it. And I've made it a one-shot because I'm warming up, I hope.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter nor I claim copyrights for anything else but my story.
She didn't know how to do anything in this muggle world and had to take it from the bottom when she moved here. Her father passed a few weeks ago and Hermione helped her get back on her feet. Her and Ginny were very nice and told her they would do anything to take away their pain, because they all experienced the loss of someone dear; the sixth year of Hogwarts was a pain in her heart. No daddy to say good-bye to, not a single prank, as they all thought she was too fragile to handle it, but the truth was, it would have done her so good if they all went back to how they used to be. She didn't like changing, and this event caused her to grow up, to grow out of her weirdness, out of herself and become what she now thought was born to be. A witch. A student at Hogwarts, another student in the Great Hall, waiting for the next class, joking and laughing silent with her normal friends. She missed from time to time what she used to be; she missed being picked on, she even missed staying up all night, looking for her stuff. But things were different and she had to change too.
When the year ended, Hermione told her she could go and stay with her, as she lived a pretty happy life outside Hogwarts. She was happy. Ginny was happy. Luna thought everybody lined up and got some happiness and when her turn came, there wasn't any left. Abandoned. Dead. Empty. She had to overcome her sorrows in some way because her life wasn't getting better, but she still hoped someone would come and make it.
Black jeans and a grey blouse; her blonde hair was tangled and her nails were bitten. She leaned her hair on the metal bar in the underground, waiting for her station to come. She closed her eyes for a second, and opened them quickly thinking she saw a familiar face; she looked around and saw a black woman with her child, an old woman with a bag full of bagels and some kid reading a paper.
"I'm not near insanity. I am insane for good." she thought and closed her eyes again. She got off at London Bridge and started walking home, keeping her eyes as open as possible. There wasn't much until she realized she had passed Hermione's apartment and she turned around, wondering why was she so absorbed by that guy's ring. The guy in the tube, with a big ring on his middle finger. She thought for a second that he could have been one of her classmates, but remembered she wasn't going to a normal school. Nothing about her was normal, not her hair, not her voice, her school, her allure and certainly not her life. Nothing that a normal kid was ever going to believe and nothing a normal person would ever be willing to understand. Except losing her father; she was sure she wasn't the only one, but she sure as hell suffered the most.
However, how would she know? She had forgotten him, she had a little help. It is quite weird that the same year her papa passed away, she fell in love. Not a crush, not a mere attraction. A true and painful love, which haunted her for six months until Easter and then started fading away, but never going with all its feelings. Neville had no idea, for he would have done something, he was too much of a good boy.
She never told anyone, fearing of being judged, as anyone. She didn't want to forget her father too soon. She didn't want to forget him in the first place, but how would she live her life if she let grief overcome her very own personality, worse than it did already?
When she got home, seemed like Hermione had organized a family meeting. Harry and Ron were there, Ginny and her brothers, Neville Longbottom. She never expected him, but couldn't stop smiling the instant she saw him. She had thought of him all the way home and now he was here, for her, apparently. After she changed and they all got a little more comfortable, they all started talking and kept the party going until the middle of the night. Harry decided he was going to go to sleep and Ginny followed him quickly, leaving a living room full of laughter. Afterwards, everybody was half asleep when Hermione prepared some beds for them, and stayed another half an hour with Luna in the kitchen.
"I'm really glad you arranged this, I really appreciate it. I needed this." Luna was being honest and was ready to be honest with everything. "I still don't know how to cope with this, I'm afraid I have forgotten him too quickly. He deserved a little more grief." she wiped a tear off her cheek and turned her face away. They were both sitting on the table, and Hermione had a glass of wine in her hands.
"He doesn't 'deserve' grief and it's certainly not a way of showing how much you cared for him. Luna, you shouldn't think that you ought to suffer more and more and never come to an end of this state of mind that puts you down with only one thought. It's okay to be sad as much as it's your right to continue to live your life." she looked at her with serious eyes and Luna responded with a little tear in the corner of the right eye. She needed this so much.
"Well, Blondie, I'm hitting the sack now, I've had too much wine. Will you be okay?" Luna smiled back and she felt inside that she knew the answer; Hermione knew it too so she just kissed her goodnight and walked out of the kitchen.
Half an hour lately, she poured herself some milk and her hand froze on the glass until she finally realized what she was doing. It took her ten minutes. "I think I might just be retarded. What was I expecting?" she mumbled and drank half of it. A sleepy voice answered out of nowhere "out of what?"
Neville was standing on the kitchen counter and looking at her with a confused expression.
"What are you doing here at this hour? I thought you were sleeping." she drank the other half and turned around with all of her body.
"Well, I needed some tea. I can't sleep. I sure tried, but Fred's snoring really gets out the best in him." they both laughed for a while and then an awkward silence set itself over them. Then Neville started talking again. "I know you miss your dad." she felt like rivers of tears were falling out of her eyes but she didn't pay attention to them.
"I miss my dad too. Actually, I miss both of them. I don't remember them much, but I know that I miss them. And I know you miss him too. I know what it's like to miss someone." he was getting nervous seeing her just staring at him with blank eyes, tears falling down, wetting her t-shirt, her hands, the floor; just streams and streams of tears caused by a single sentence he said.
"I repeated 'miss' a lot. Haha, I don't even, um... ah, I can't even have a decent conversation without bringing so much joy to people." he leaned his head back with a bitter smile and then rose it back up. "I missed... um... you, lately." he got off the counter and looked down, frowning a little. He couldn't see her crying. How could he?
"What do you mean?" she wiped away her tears leaving a line of eyeliner spreaded across her face, just to make way for new ones to come again.
"The way you used to be. Dreamy and not caring for what everybody thinks and a little more you than now." he was looking as he was about to puke. He was very nervous, and her tears didn't make the situation any better, and yet he had to get it all out, once and for all.
"I like you now too. Very much, really. I like how you turn your head every time you hear Luna and slowly whisper 'Loony', thinking nobody notices. I like how you once hid your book just for fun, I suppose you thought that if you did it, other will start doing it again." he looked at her and she looked ashamed.
"I'm sorry for making you cry. I just noticed stuff. I like you, really. But I kind of liked the old you a little more. You looked more relaxed. You were happy, I guess things got pretty weird, we had a rough year. But I'm being honest and I'm taking a chance at being selfish too saying you messed up my feelings. I was in love with a girl for five years and she came back another. I think I love this one too, but I miss my first love."
He was looking down and Luna started sobbing quietly. She picked up a napkin and wiped her tears and then blew her nose quietly. Without even thinking what he was doing, he took it out of her hands and pecked her lips, and then kissed her slowly, but firm. He wasn't going to miss out on this. He wanted her to know, and she knew. She understood because she felt the same way. And then they both just slipped into an eternity with each others lips.
