It was all Levi's fault. Eren didn't even want to go to the mall. He still wasn't sure why the hell Levi wanted to. Levi hated the mall. But he woke up to his phone ringing that morning anyway, and wasn't stupid enough to ignore it. The last time he'd ignored a call from Levi the other had shown up at his house and proceeded to bang on the door until everyone in the house was awake.
"Hello?" He mumbled into the phone, wondering how dead he would be if he fell asleep talking to his friend.
"Get your ass out of bed. It's almost noon. Seriously, Eren?" Why was he friends with Levi anyway? "We're going to the mall. Be ready in ten minutes." And then Levi hung up and Eren decided he hated his life. No, actually he decided he hated his life when he tried to get out of bed and fell face first onto his floor.
Eren brushed his teeth and got dressed before quickly making his bed because Levi would know if he didn't. Eren wasn't sure how he would know, but he would; he seemed to have some kind of sixth sense for when there was a mess.
He was just straitening up the blankets when he heard a car horn outside, and rushed out to get in the passenger seat of Levi's SUV. "You look terrible." Levi informed him.
"I'm sorry that it takes more than ten minutes to look decent after waking up."
"Then don't waste five of them lying around in bed." Levi said before pulling out of Eren's driveway.
"We aren't here to shop for boys, so stop staring at that one." Levi said impassively as they ate in the food court. Levi hadn't wanted to, complaining about how unsanitary mall food courts were, but Eren hadn't had a chance to eat before leaving, so he'd insisted. Eren was the only one really eating; Levi was just stealing a few of his fries every few minutes or so.
"What are we here for anyway? Is Sephora having a sale on the blood of innocents? Or is Hot Topic selling the ashes of children?" Eren asked with a laugh.
Levi looked less than impressed by Eren's jokes as he got to his feet. "Hey, what are you doing?" Eren asked, looking panicked as Levi walked over to the table where two boys were sitting, one of them being the one that Eren had been staring at.
"Hey, you, my gross friend wants to suck your gross dick." Levi said, pointing at an absolutely mortified Eren who was now sinking down in his seat to try and disappear.
"You hear that, Jean, it's a mutual thing then." The freckled one said between laughs while the one that Eren had been staring at, Jean apparently, was blushing a bright red.
"Do what you want with that information. I'm going to go buy the book I came here for." Levi said before turning and walking out of the food court entirely, ignoring the "Levi, you bastard!" that was shouted after him.
"I'm sorry. My friend is the worst. Please ignore him." Eren said.
"Don't worry about it. Marco isn't being that great at the moment either." Jean replied, glaring at his still laughing friend.
"Wanna talk about how much our friends suck over coffee? I'll pay." Eren offered, giving a tiny smile, still blushing from the embarrassment that apparently came with being friends with Levi.
"Sounds wonderful." Jean got out of his seat and walked over to Eren.
"Please don't suck his dick in the coffee shop." Marco called after him, earning them quite a few looks as both of them shouted at him to shut the hell up.
Levi still takes full credit for their relationship years later. Anytime he wants something from them he'll say, "You two wouldn't even be together if it weren't for me," as a way to get them to do whatever it is. Eren's pretty sure that half the reason Levi did it was so that he would have something to hold over their heads. The other half was obviously because he was a terrible friend who wanted to embarrass Eren. Levi doesn't even try to deny it when Eren brings up the accusation.