Mycroft had always managed to keep his relationship with Detective Inspector Lestrade a close secret. Even his wretched brother, Sherlock, had only found out because he'd broken into Lestrade's flat, God knows why, and found Mycroft's tie. Yes, the politician had kept his cards very close to his chest. Jim pondered this for the third time this week, which is more than he'd ever thought about anything. Normally it didn't take him long to think things through but this, this was... different.
In fact, Jim had only discovered Mycroft's relationship status because of Sherlock. The so-called genius couldn't tell when his flat was bugged. Jim thought he'd made it obvious enough but evidently not. No matter, Jim was quite content to keep the bugs in use if Sherlock hadn't had the sense to rip them out of the wall yet. Bullet holes are a prime location for bugs, it's lucky Sherlock gets so violently bored.
Jim leaned back in his chair, biting the thumb nail of his right hand in thought. Now a new game was in play. Jim had always wanted Mycroft's... co-operation, but had always been unclear on an effective way to get it. The Detective Inspector was out of the question, threatening Mycroft with Lestrade's well being wouldn't bring him co-operation, if anything more resistance. Lestrade knew Mycroft would always put his work first, national importance and all, so he'd be prepared to be used as bargaining chips. That's not what Jim could afford; anyone who is prepared to be used like that is of no value to him. No, he needed something else. He grinned wickedly to himself. Now he knew Mycroft's... preferences... He could have the politician wrapped around his little finger. That's exactly what he wanted.
It started with a phone call.
Mycroft's voice was thick with importance as he answered the phone. "Mycroft Holmes."
Jim smiled "Mycroft, my dear! How are you?"
"If this is a social call, Mr Moriarty, you're wasting both our times."
Jim chuckled down the line "Oh, Mycroft, I do love it when you call me that." He said with a hint of a growl that made Mycroft's throat tighten.
"I don't care. Kindly tell me what you want or end this call before I do." Mycroft snapped, drumming his fingers on the desk he was sat behind.
"Oh, don't ruin my fun! I was merely checking up on you. We wouldn't want anything to happen to you now, would we?" Jim purred down the line, almost hearing Mycroft's thoughts pause for a second.
"How considerate of you. I'm fine. Goodbye, Mr Moriarty"
"And send my regards to the detective inspector, won't you?" Jim called, knowing the receiver was half way back to its cradle. There was a pause.
"I'm sorry?" Mycroft's voice sounded tight, despite his efforts to remain nonchalant.
"Oh, don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about." Jim cooed, "I understand that you and the good Detective Inspector Lestrade have an... arrangement." His tongue clicked the final "T" in a way that radiated smugness to Mycroft's quickly reddening ears.
There was a soft clatter as a pen was dropped, making Jim laugh almost silently. Mycroft stayed silent for a few seconds, trying to gather his thoughts. He couldn't possibly confirm Moriarty's statement, nor could he deny it. Moriarty already knew it to be true after all, but he couldn't give Jim the satisfaction of acknowledging it.
"What business of yours is my private life?" He muttered down the phone, through clenched teeth.
"None at all, I just found it... Interesting. I'd never thought you to be type to settle down, especially not with someone like Lestrade."
"Don't- What's that supposed to mean?" Mycroft's impatience causing his professional mask to slip.
"I think you know what it means" Jim laughed, his voice hinting at a growl again. "Goodbye, Mycroft, I'll be in touch." He hung up before Mycroft could answer, knowing that he had sent the politician's mind into disarray with his fruitless answers and ambiguous comments. Of course, the subtext was quite clear but to someone like Mycroft, he would think of a hundred different meanings behind Moriarty's words before arriving at the right conclusion. And by then it would be too late.