Evan couldn't take it anymore, hearing Jonathan's whimpers and silent cries while tossing and turning in the old bed to his, squeaking every once and awhile. He thought he would be able to control himself, to not want to pull Jonathan into a warm embrace and kiss his tears away, thought he would be able to distance himself from him, and to not fall even harder than he already had. Not to mention the 4 other students in the small wooden cabin, not far from the center of the campsite. Evan however, was not awoken by the cries, but was indeed awake from the very start of the night, he was a night owl to say the least. Each whimper and cry that left Jonathan's mouth hurt Evan more and more, hurt to see the person he loved so much, in such a painful, chaotic slumber.
He got up from the stiff bed and takes the short step from his bed to Jonathan's. He could faintly see his face from the moonlight, and the glare of the wet tears on his cheeks. Evan puts a his hand on his cheek, rubbing his cheekbone and gave him a look filled with sorrow and pain. He moved the hand on to Jonathan's shoulder, and softly shaked him, whispering his name ever so softly in Jonathan's ear. Immediately the blue eyes shot open, revealing it's beautiful color. Jonathan quickly sat upwards, leaning on his elbows.
"I'm sorry." were the first words that came out of his mouth, escaping his plump pink lips with a sad sign.
"Don't be. I was already awake." Evan put on his hand out, waiting for Jonathan to grab it. When he did Evan led him outside of the cabin, and sat down on the steps, hands still intertwined.
"Are you okay?" Evan asked.
"No." he replied quickly. Now if he had not just woken up, he would said he was fine and waved this one off like the rest of them, but alas no sleep= no filter, and it slipped out of his mouth before he could stop it. He open his mouth to play it off but was quickly shushed by Evan.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Evan asked, surprising Jonathan. Most of the time, people would practically force him into telling them what was wrong, and then of course did nothing in return, only wanting the juicy details of what went on in that delirious brain of his.
"Yeah... It happens a lot, the nightmares. It's blurry but so fucking real and I don't know where I am and I'm falling and I see the people who I care about being pulled away from me and dying and it's so fucking scary and I just can't deal with it and it happens all the time and…" Jonathan teared up. Evan pulled him into a tight embrace and softly ran his thumb in circles on the back of Jonathan's hand.
"Breathe. Just breathe. It's okay, I'm right here." Evan kissed his forehead and held him tighter. Jonathan took deep breaths and calmed down, sniffling and wiping the tears from his eyes.
"It just feels so fucking real Evan, seeing the people you love dying in front of you, begging for mercy and you're fucking hurts more than ever imaginable. It feels so real, It's like they were actually gone. But this time, it was different. It wasn't multiple people, it wasn't my family. It was one person."
"Who?"
"You. and it was so real and fucking terrifying. I don't want to lose you Evan, I don't want you to leave me when things get tough like everyone else had, I don't want you to ever stop laughing with me and making me feel so fucking alive. I can't lose you, not when you're the one thing that matters the most." Jonathan looked up and locked eyes with Evan, tears starting to form.
"You won't. I could never do that. God Jonathan, my life without you is something I never want to experience, you make me laugh when I want to cry, you know me inside and out. I'm never going to leave you Jonathan. Never." Evan said. Then they just sat there, in eachothers arms, soaking up eachothers presence, feeling love and warmth filling their bodies.
When Evan felt his eyelids getting heavy, he grabbed Jonathan's hand and pulled him up. They went back into the cabin, and Jonathan was about to part to his bed, but Evan pulled him towards his own. Confused as ever, Jonathan froze in place in front of Evan's bed. Evan faced him and stared into his blue eyes, put his hand on Jonathan's cheek, rubbing his thumb on his cheekbone and then his lips; slowly leaning in and kissing Jonathan softly. Jonathan put his hands on Evan's waist and pulled them closer. The kisses became longer and deeper, until Evan slightly pulled away, hands on the back of Jonathan's neck, foreheads pressed together and eyes locked deeply in an enchanted stare.
"Stay. Let me show you that I'm never letting you go." he whispered. Jonathan nodded. He pulled Jonathan down to the small bed with him. Jonathan joined him underneath the thin covers, and felt his back pressed against the front of Evan, his arm and leg wrapped around Jonathan's body and pressed his lips against Jonathan's neck, kissing him softly.
"I'm never letting you go." was whispered in Jonathan's ears, accompanied with soft kisses and whispers of sweet nothings, before drifting off to a peaceful sleep, dreaming of Evan and a soft shade of violet.
"I knew it! Pay up fuckers!" Tyler yelled in the early morning after. Evan and Jonathan squirted struggling to see what unfolded in front of them.
"Anyone want to explain what you guys are talking about?" Jonathan asked, climbing out of bed.
"We may or may not of placed bets on whether you guys would get together on this trip, let's just say me and Tyler are about to get 20 bucks richer."