Disclaimer: I do not own Gossip Girl or any of its characters. I only own this variation of the plot, my mistakes, and all OCs unless mentioned otherwise.

Four years past since Jenny contacted anyone from the Upper East Side. When Jenny had left, she still tried to send a monthly email or text to her dad telling him she was fine and to not worry. That was four years ago. Then, all of a sudden she stopped texting and emailing. It was like she had slipped off the face of the Earth and that was the end of one Jenny Humphrey. For those who knew her, it was the end of Jenny Humphrey. They thought she had been murdered or fallen prey to one of the epidemics of yellow fever. What they didn't know, was that she was alive, and still very close to them.

Jenny was actually very close and alive, less than twenty miles from them, but in a totally different, and darker world. She had been living in Brooklyn in a variety of poorhouses, until she had met a man that would change her life. That man, Josh Richardson, was exactly the type of man she was looking for. Passionate, rich, and handsome, at least that was what he seemed to be. She had fallen in love, married him. She had lived a trapped life, but was seemingly content with it. Four years later, she discovered she was pregnant. And that was when the trouble began.

"Kill it." he said, crossly. "I don't want a kid, so just kill it now and forget this whole pregnancy thing."

Jenny was confused. Was not he excited that he was having her first child. Did not he want to be a dad. They had talked about it, and he was excited. Now, why was he so against it?

That word, why, was a common thought in her brain. She sat around for a few days trying to figure out his reaction. His hatred for his child puzzled her. He was a dad, should he not be happy? Instead, it seemed as if he was angry.

Finally, she decided to confront him about it. She dressed nicely, his favorite dark blue dress and red peep-toes, put a headband on, and the pretty necklace he gave her. She then went to cook his favorite dinner, Fusilli with proscuitto and kale, and set the table nicely with a bouquet of flowers. When she came home, he appeared to be in a good mood, and Jenny was pleased. All was going well with her plan. She set dinner before him and even dinner went well, no mention of the pregnancy. It was with dessert that the trouble began.

"Josh dear, what do you think about the pregnancy. I think you will be a great father," Jenny cooed, hoping that he was going to be kind, and apologize for his insensitivity earlier. It turned out, it wasn't.

"Jenny, I told you, abort the baby. I am not ready to be a dad. I don't even want to be dad. I want my business to grow, to travel around the world, and not be burdened by a child. I am going to set up an appointment with the clinic to get rid of it."

"Josh, really. I want the baby. I know I am young, but how am I going to kill the poor baby? My values simply won't let me get rid of our baby."

"Jenny, I am your husband. You will obey me, or I will divorce you. This is serious and I am not going to budge."

"Josh, I am a mother. I can't simply just kill my baby. I also can't divorce you, I love you too much," Jenny sobbed.

"Jenny, you love me, but you love it. You will have to choose. Me, your husband, your financial stability, or that fetus that will loose you everything. Your choice." As much as it pained Josh to say it, he knew he simply could not be a father. He simply would not, and if that meant divorcing his wife, then so be it.

"Josh, I need time to think. I also want to know, what would the divorce terms be? Full custody of the child, little child support and nothing else? What?"

"Jenny, are you really considering divorcing me? Really, please think honey. I love you, but you need to understand that as your husband, I am the 51 percent in this marriage. After all, I am the man in the family, and head of house. I can't have chaos in this house."

"Josh, this pains me to say this, but I think we need to put on hold our marriage. You and I are both really upset right now, and we should take some time and think through this."

Josh, trying to be rational and understanding, took his wife's suggestion, and headed off to the one of the hotels. Checking in, he sighed to himself, and wished he was curled up with his wife, in their favorite armchair, her body keeping him warm.

Jenny, meanwhile had gone to the living room, and sinking down on the piano bench began playing Moonlight Sonata. The repetitiveness was soothing to her frazzled nerves, and she often thought of her marriage like the music, repetitive, having its highs and lows, mostly lows for her. She had wanted to become a fashion designer, and work, but now with her husband she could not. He insisted she stay at home and keep the house for him. She had to wear long, ankle length dresses of bland, feminine colors, and was never allowed out of the house alone, except to buy groceries. She was banned from the outside world, never having a cell phone, or computer. She loved the man, but with all her limitations, and the baby, she realized she had only become a shell of what she was. She sighed and remembered the times before she got kicked out of Manhattan, the times when she lived with her dad, the waffle breakfasts, the times shopping with Serena before she messed things up, the time when Blair crowned her Queen, and all the other ups and downs of living the high life. She thought, I hate my life. Hold on, what life? I have none, and have been kept in this house for the last four years. I have not been able to contact my family, get time to make friends or have fun. And what - I am only 21! I should be having fun, not tied down to this day to day prison. And do I really love my husband? These were only some of the troubling thoughts that surrounded her?

Meanwhile, Josh was out at the bar, having fun, drinking away his sorrows. He was getting more and more wasted by the shot, and was soon drunk. During that time, he ended up in a private room with one of prostitutes, and ended up having sex with her. The next morning, after realizing how much fun he was having, he decided to stay there for the next two weeks.

Jenny, after finishing her time at the piano, soon got up and decided that she was going to divorce. She was no longer happy with her life as a Richardson and missed being Jenny Humphrey. She missed the freedom and was regretting spending some of what could have been the best years of her life died down. She was going to pack up and get a divorce. Happily, she collected her things - her old clothing, her make up, her money, and her few other belongings that had not been given to her by Josh. Then writing a letter expressing how she no longer loved him, and while she gave a shot at living the life of a good, obedient, wife and housekeeper she realized she was not cut out for the description. She then went to the bank and did her final act as Mrs. Richardson. She took out 3/4 of the money in the account, as she and her husband had agreed before she got married, transferred it into a new account at another bank, and then went to court. After contacting a lawyer, she filed the divorce papers and sued Josh for keeping all the rules and abuse.

When Josh received notice of the divorce, and the upcoming court case, he was shocked, to say the least. He was not expecting her to initiate the divorce, nor was he pleased to see that she was suing him for 1 million, and had a good chance of winning the case. After contacting his lawyer, he decided that he might as well hand over the money and save face, rather than lose.

Jenny was pleased. Well, at least Josh had the good sense to let me have the money. Now, the next challenge - finding a place soon enough to settle down before the pregnancy gets to be too bad. Leaving her cheap hotel room, she went to a real estate agent's office and began the process of house hunting. After spending several days hunting, she settled down to a comfortable town house in Astoria in New York overlooking the water separating her from The Upper East Side and her previous life. Since she knew no one would cross over into oh-so-lowly Astoria City, she would be safe from the Upper East side drama, while still be close enough to feel the big city rush. She also presumed she was safe from Blair, as she was in a different district and a river away.

When she entered the fourth townhouse, it was love at first sight. The three story building was perfect for her, she had a lobby/reception area downstairs and didn't need to live on the first floor with all the noise. The living room, bathrooms, and kitchen was just what Jenny wanted. It had dark, wooden floors, sage green walls, and silver accents without being over the top. The master bedroom was large, with a thick, cream carpet, ice blue walls and golden touches. The guest bedroom was also pretty, done in various shades of purple with champagne colored touches. However, it was the office that Jenny liked the most. It was larger than any of the other rooms in the house and could easily fit a desk along with several cupboards and a large work table. Perfect for starting working on designing clothes again. Now that I have the time, the money, and the freedom to do so, I can eventually go looking for someone to work with. But before that, I will have all the space do what I love, making some new clothes for myself. The ones Josh got me were terrible. They are ankle length and looked like something out of Little House on the Prarie. I just can't wear such awful yards of bland cloth. Maybe I can take them and turn them into attic curtains. Yes, that will do, they have that bland, old, grandmothery look to them.

A couple weeks later, Jenny emerged from her work room with a brand new wardrobe and a brand new home too. She was able to strike a good deal on the house and had even gotten an amazing collection of antique and classic, modern furniture to match perfectly. After a trip to Best Buy, Jenny came out with a computer and finally the thing she longed for - computer access. When getting on the computer, she considered checking Gossip Girl, but thought, Why? Why should I bother at looking at what is going on for people of my past who lied, hurt, and backstab me. Besides, it would rope me into their world again, something I have vowed to not do. During my time with Josh, I finally discovered who I wanted to be, even though I was unwilling to call off my marriage and break free. I now know, I am Jennifer Humphrey, soon to be famous fashion designer, married to my clothing, and my work. I love clothes and fashion, and I love the big city. I am not Blair, I am not Serena, I am not Anges, I am not Vanessa, I am even not Little J. I am proud to be who I am, and I won't let anyone derail me from my plan of staying that way.

Dear amazing readers!

I have deleted the story and am now reposting it! So here you go! Thanks to my amazing betas: firecracker1990 (thank you endlessly for your support and ideas), . . (thanks for your formatting help, teaching me Docx, and everything else) and . , (I have loved your ideas and tips.) If there is anyone I have forgotten, please forgive me and PM me so you will be on the next list of betas. You are all amazing. Thank you for all your hard work and thought!

Just a minor thing that bothers me, my username is .stark, not .stark. NOT a big deal, just a minor annoyance!

Best Wishes,

.stark