A/N: A short, fairly depressing A/B songfic, set to 'Valentine's Day' by Linkin Park. Not my usual thing at all, but I was quite pleased with how it all turned out, and would be really grateful if you took a few moments to review. Thanks for reading, hope you enjoy it.
Disclaimer: I neither own, nor claim to own the 'Twilight' franchise and no challenge is made nor implied to the owner's copyright.
On a Valentine's Day
My insides all turn to ash, so slow
And blew away as I collapsed, so cold
A black wind took them away, from sight
And held the darkness over day, that night
Night had already begun to creep into the edges of the sky as Alice paced silently among the trees. The deep clouds above blanketed the heavens in a sombre grey as the snow continued to fall. Try as she might, the petite vampire felt incapable of stopping the dark which assailed her thoughts – a whirl of black memories, visions of haunted faces, all lined in pain. She knew exactly where it had all started.
Months ago, Bella had started at Forks High School, and it was from her very first day that she developed an interest in the Cullens. And on that day, when Alice first caught Bella's eye, there was the vision. She saw the two of them, walking together to a clearing in the forest. They had sat together amongst the flowers, smiling, laughing together. Then, Bella had snuggled up against Alice's body. 'I love you', the brown-eyed girl whispered softly. Alice responded by leaning in and placing a kiss upon her forehead. 'I love you too'. And that was when Alice knew that sooner or later, she would fall in love with Bella.
And, fall in love with Bella she did. Initially, she was cautious, treading carefully, but, when Bella and Edward began dating, Alive was delighted to treat the human girl as one of her own, a little sister who she'd never had, through whom she could live vicariously – a link to a human life she could not remember. Days passed, and time went on and on, but with its passing, Alive couldn't help but begin to feel jealous of the time which Edward spent with Bella. How she longed to be that close, to feel the girl's warmth, to hear her laugh, enjoy the sensation of her warm breath against her own cold marble skin... Slowly but surely, Alice's thoughts grew wilder, more jealous, becoming at times erotic in their nature – but, Alice vowed that she would never do anything to drive Edward and Bella apart. She couldn't stand the thought of inflicting that hurt on Bella – on her Bella.
And the clouds above move closer
Looking so dissatisfied
But the heartless wind kept blowing, blowing
The snow was falling more heavily now, twisting and dancing in the breeze which shook the trees, their gnarled limbs creaking. Mist was swirling among their half-seen forms,brooding and shadowy, the weak light still spilling in tinted a cold blue. Clumps of ferns were dotted across the forest floor, thick with the night frost, sprawling tree roots reaching out beside them under the carpet of snow. Alice paced ever-onwards, striding nimbly into the rapidly-gathering dusk as she rounded a small, frozen lake, archipelagos of ice floating among the still, mirrored sea of its surface. She shivered instinctively, even though the cold could not affect her. More memories were flooding back now, unstoppable, as a dull ache gathered in her chest.
It had been a few days after Bella's disastrous eighteenth birthday that Edward had decided that the Cullens should leave Forks. A clean break. Alice hadn't been able to say goodbye – Edward had simply told Bella that she would never see any of them again, and, in doing so, broken the girl's heart. Alice had been so angry with him – how could he have done that to her? She had been tempted to leave, go back to Forks once more and tell Bella that she couldn't live without her. But she resisted – Edward should, after all, know what was best for them all. Weeks slowly dragged into months through the bleak Alaskan winter.
And then, one day it had happened. Just when Alice had begun to accept that she really would never see Bella again, she saw another vision. There she was – Bella, alone and shivering at a cliff top, hardly visible through a haze of wind-driven rain. She stopped forward, looked momentarily down and then, she jumped, plunging towards the crushing blackness of the churning waters below, gasping as her lungs filled with water, her silent scream stifled by the cruel sea. She managed a single word before her eyes closed. 'Alice'.
Blind panic had then filled Alice, who had taken off without a moment's hesitation, crossing the two thousand miles which separated her from Bella as fast as she could, every moment cursing the slowness of her transport, be it plane, hire car or her own feet, running from the road towards the cliffs she had seen in her vision.
But she was too late. A sick, burning feeling settled itself in the pit of her stomach as she remembered that grey, desolate beach, rain pouring down from the black sky above. There was Bella, sprawled on the sand, her face pale, lifeless, cold as ice, Jacob by her side, shaking her, calling her name as tears streamed down his face. Then, abruptly he stood, looking up to the gathering night. At that moment, Alice knew that all hope was lost – a heartrending, feral howl of misery ripped from Jacob's throat as Alice stood numb, grief fast overtaking her.
I used to be my own protection, but not now
Cause my path has lost direction, somehow
A black wind took you away, from sight
And held the darkness over day, that night
How could you leave me like this, Bella, Alice thought desolately to herself. How am I meant to make it through alone? It was never meant to be this way. She thought bleakly back to that first vision, and of every moment she regretted not spending by Bella's side The ache she felt when she'd had to leave. How she'd felt it a thousand times worse on that beach, what could have been hours of clasping Bella's dead hand in her own, as the rain fell. If only I could have said goodbye. Just goodbye to her... my Bella. There was no-one to blame for her death, no anger, no retribution – nothing. And that, perhaps, was why it hurt so much.
And the clouds above move closer
Looking so dissatisfied
And the ground below grew colder
As they put you down inside
But the heartless wind kept blowing, blowing
The forest began to open up ahead, a clearing visible below its thin coverlet of new-fallen snow. Alice stepped soundlessly out – it was here that Edward had spent so many happy days with Bella, among the flowers. But now, the flowers had died away, the icy grip of winter still holding fast on the soil. In the centre of the clearing – there it was.
Alice knelt by the side of the little grave, brushing some of the snow from the cold, unyielding headstone. It simply bore Bella's name and dates, and a phrase, which Alice whispered to herself as she read it. 'And so now, darkness falls, until the day doth break. Soon the morning sun shall rise, and chase night's shadow's away'. Her voice cracked as she finished, misery welling up inside. What was left for her, now that the one she loved lie frozen and lifeless in the ground below?
So now you're gone
And I was wrong
I never knew what it was like
To be alone
On a Valentine's Day
Alice's shoulders heaved, wracked with silent sobs, as she remained there awake and sleepless as stars shone far above.