Klanck, Klanck, Klanck. What the hell was that? He thought as he tried to understand what was banging on his house. Klanck, Klanck, Klanck. Seriously, if this was all those kids, that changed every week, that psychotic bird, with that imaginary crackhead, and those red freaks from hell, he was going to lose it.
"What!?" he yelled as he jumped up from his trashcan.
"Oscar, Oscar come with us, we're gonna have fun," exclaimed the giant yellow bird from god knows where.
"No go away, I was sleeping, and I wanna be alone," he growled at them.
"Oscar, come with us please, said, one of the red horrors.
"No, go away," he was really losing his temper.
Just then one of the "new" kids on the block came up, and said, "Oscar, your a grouch!" That's it he has had with this shit!
"Bitch, of course I am, I live in a fucking trashcan. You wanna see someone happy? Watch Bird after he rapes one of your friends. What your surprised? Why do you think so many people move away all the time? The only reason he isn't busted is because he pays those parents lots of money, which he gets from dealing cocain!" Oscar yelled so loud for the whole street to hear. Suddenly all the parents looked so surprised you think a kid got ran over, well one did but he was on heroine so it don't matter.
" What are you talking about Oscar, I love kids," said Bird as he tried to defend himself.
"You sure do, only I think it's a little too much," replied Oscar. This was it after being made fun of for years, it was payback time, and like the saying said it was a .
"Oscar! screamed a deep foreign sounding voice, Why are you telling these kids lies!" It was the Count and he was looking pissed.
"Oh shut up or I'll tell them how you run the local whore house, said Oscar with a venomous tone, Or I'll tell Immigration how your not an American,"
By this point all the parents wee calling the real-estate offices looking for new homes. They had no idea that this neighborhood was shared with a child molesting drug dealer, and an Illegal alien pimp.
"Now the next sonavabitch that calls me a grouch is gonna get shot though their motherfucking head so fast, their grandma's gonna say "ow what the fuck just me in the back of the head! Oscar yelled out, I've been wanting to get out of here but this is my fucking home so, be gone!"
5 hours later
"Bird, Count your both under arrest for crimes against our fair city, said a police officer as he handcuffed both Bird, and the Count. At last he could finaly sleep in peace.
"NO, I will not go back!" Screamed the Count as pulled the cops gun from him, and pointed it at a kids head.
BOOM, was heard by everyone. Soon they saw that the only thing left of the Counts head was the neck. They all turned too see Oscar with a shotgun in his hand.
"Thank God, for the second ammendment," he said. Then he walked back to his trashcan and hoped in. Five minutes later people heard snoring from the lid.
The End