Oh my Gawd – am I seriously writing this?
Yes. Yes I am. WELL.
This is ANZ pairing (Australia/New Zealand for those who don't know) and it's my first Hetalia fic. I can't really find a way to write some of them, so I thought I'd give two of my fave bitches a try. So, I hope you like it! Nothing bad, no lemons, not a citrus in sight. Just two guys and their sexy-ness ;D
I know Iggy would've had different colonies at the same time, but this focuses on Oz and Zea, so….yeah. Also, I'm horrible with history, even though it's my favourite subject.
For those of you who don't know where or what Canberra is, leave immediately. Seriously, you call yourself a Hetalia fan and you're NOT obsessed with learning the capital of every single country in the world? Okay, maybe that's just me. So EXCU-USE ME, PRINCESS for knowing the capital of my country is Canberra and not Sydney! I just thought the rest of the world needed to know too.
And it is my personal head-canon that all countries live in their capital. So poo on you if you don't like Canberra, because I LIVE THERE AND I THINK IT'S AMAYZAH! I don't care if that makes me sound biased. Humph.
The song Oz sings is actually one sang by Australian citizens and soldiers for recruitment… and just to help themselves feel a bit better about what they were doing… it's pretty sad … so it may sound a little depressing… but it's to the tune of "Waltzing Matilda". Everyone should have at least heard of that song. Seriously.
Lol poor Canadia. Whoops; that was an accident. Totally.
Oh, and human names used:
Oz – Keith; Zea – Benjamin; Turkey – Sadiq; Egypt – Gupta; England – Arthur; America – Alfred; Italy – Feliciano; Japan – Kiku; Germany – Ludwig; Russia – Ivan; Canada – Matthew; Austria – Rodderich; Hungary – Elizaveta; France – Francis; Serbia – Novak; Belgium – Bella (what, it makes sense!)
Read and review, but flames hurt, so try not to be mean. OzzieLiber-Tea~~~
Keith was a pretty tall guy; he was built like a gorilla, and just as hairy. Seriously, if a gorilla challenged him for a fight for territory, Keith would be victorious (it wasn't Zea's fault he caught himself staring at the guy – he was just… too damn sexy).
His attitude was like the sun – always shining, and his smile was so bright it would give the sun a run for its money. The things that got him pissed (like, seriously pissed, not just a little iffy) were insulting his mum or the rough-and-tumble way he lived, getting his capital wrong, Carlton's full strength lager, or insulting his boss (which Benji did so often it wasn't funny, but Keith would accept it, because sometimes he hated his boss too).
Things like that gave Keith thunder in his throat and lightening in his eyes, the anger that was stored away in his sandy, rocky heart until a desert storm would clear out through his veins and boil like there was no tomorrow. Thankfully, Benjamin was never on Keith's bad side – they were too good mates for that to happen. And, as he sat bored, at yet another pointless world meeting (or should he say yelling match), he found himself thinking about the circumstances that had brought them together… and apart.
Both Keith and Benji – otherwise known as the human personifications of Australia and New Zealand – had been raised by Arthur – the human United Kingdom. As he so often told them, it was not polite to tease or tumble, or bite and kick, or play pranks and jokes, but being the rough down under boys they were, Keith and Benji couldn't help themselves; it was in their red-as-outback-sand blood. They were constantly fighting (although it was only play fighting, to build up their strength) and Arthur was constantly telling them off.
So it was only natural that they ignore him.
But ignoring him only got them in worse trouble.
They were separated when Keith got Benji into using his native wildlife to screw with Arthur. He'd had enough of being told what to do, and so was sent back to his own country after Arthur had woken up to a King Brown snake in his bed. Sure, they're deadly poisonous, but to a nation, it'd be like a bee sting – it'd hurt for a while, then it'd go away. But that didn't mean that some countries couldn't be allergic to poison.
And thus, Zea was left alone. All he had to entertain himself while he was gone was his little pet kiwi, Auck (like Auckland). The days he spent without Keith gave him time to think – he wasn't constantly kicking or yelling – and so he became quieter and quieter until the only times he spoke was when answering another person. So, it came as quite a shock to Arthur when, not even ten years after Keith, Benji asked for independence. Afraid as he was with Keith that it would turn into an all-out war as with Alfred, Arthur complied.
But the rejoicing for Zea was nothing to fill the emptiness of his head, his voice, his soul… and so for Zea, one good thing came from World War One.
He was able to see Keith again.
The training in Egypt had been harsh, to say the least. They were trained just like any other soldier amidst the hot, sweaty, friendly and loyal ANZACs. They disrespected the British together, even – cuz for both Aussies and Kiwis, respect had to be earned. It was somewhat of a relief, to have someone treat them as an ordinary man… but that relief was always short-lived, as at the end of the day, they would feel the toll the war was extracting from them. They would feel the deaths of their men, their troops, their people's morale… and Benji couldn't help but think about whose fault it was, that they were in this war; that their people were sacrificing themselves for what seemed like a worthless cause.
Arthur.
Arthur had brought him and Keith together, yeah, but he was also the one who separated them, who dragged them into this through their 'loyalty'… as the Australian Prime Minister of the time said:
"Australia will defend the Mother Country to the last man and the last shilling."
So he found himself in front of Keith's tent, where he could hear Gupta, Arthur, Keith and all their bosses, including his own, conversing. Entering, he bowed his head for a quick second before he waved Keith outside.
As soon as they went back out, they found themselves doing the great Australian wave before sitting down in front of a lonely campfire.
"So, Zea… what'd ya wan'?" Keith had asked, smiling at him before setting a billy atop the orange and yellow flames. The smile reached his deep green eyes, so out of place in the red and dead outback, but even more out of place in this war.
It took all Zea had not to kiss Oz right then and there. It took all he had not to slap that cheeky bastard's smile right off his dirty face.
With a light dusting of pink in his cheeks, Zea leaned closer so that no one but Oz could hear him. It was a useless caution; everyone was either out getting pissed, getting fucked, or getting diagnosed with some sort of… something.
"Who do you think… is to blame for us getting into this mess?" he whispered, unsure if Keith would get it or not, his own green eyes staring deep into his best friend's.
Keith chuckled, the sound reverberating throughout his wide, burly chest.
"Mate… hasn't anyone explained it to ya yet? One a Novak's blokes shot one of Rodderich and Elizaveta's freeloading nobles, so declarations of war and shit… Ludwig stupidly backing them in any fucking situation, then Ivan mobilising like lightening on their asses… then the fuckwit Luddy invaded Francis through Bella… I think that's when Arthur came into play, mate, and you know… the call of duty and whatnot… didn't wanna let mum down…" Keith replied softly, scratching the nape of his neck with one of his large, hairy hands.
He looked up to see Zea smiling a regretful smile at him, shaking his curly blonde head slowly, his thicker-than-average-but-not-as-thick-as-Arthur's eyebrows knotting into an upwards 'v'. Keith's own thickish eyebrows shot up, confused.
"What? I'm not wrong Zea, that's how it happened…"
"I know that, Oz… I know perfectly well how the fucking war started…. But why do you think we're here? Why do you think New Zealand and Australia got pulled into this mess?" Zea said, anger seeping into his usually soft and sweet voice. "It's Arthur's bloody alliance that's caused all our men to die…"
These words seemed to spark something deep within Keith, and he immediately frowned again.
"Mate, you know it's not Arthur's; don't blame him for something that wasn't his fault! He didn't want to do this shit – it's his boss and his people, just the same reason we're stuck in this mess. Why do you think we're fighting our friends? Why do you think during all of history we've fought our friends?"
When Zea held his breath and gazed silently into Oz's eyes to ponder the words that still hung in the air, Oz continued with his rant.
"Because we're not the ones who started it. We're just the unlucky sons of bitches that got personified into fucking nations. We're just the ones who feel our people die. We're just the ones that have to deal with all the hate, the poverty, the bitterness and the selfishness of this world. We're just the only ones… who can't decide their own fate. So… don't blame Arthur, Zea. Blame the hatred in the hearts of men."
With that last, hurtful comment, Zea watched Keith walk off, stumbling over a rock and cursing under his breath.
And those were the last words that were spoken between them before they left for Turkey and Gallipoli…
Except for the haunting song he caught Oz singing the night they loaded their naval vessels for the trip. He recognised the tune easily: it was practically Oz's anthem. Obviously, while he was singing it, he was thinking of bushwalking and forty-degree heat, but… the lyrics were sad and mourning a life that most of these men would lose.
"Who'll kill the Kaiser,
Who'll kill the Kaiser?
Who'll come a-killing the Kaiser with me?
So we'll drink all his beer and eat up all his sausages;
Who'll come a-killing the Kaiser with me?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(^J^)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So, over a century had passed, and relations between the nations were getting better.
Well, at least that's what it looked like on the outside….
But if you walked into this room full of bickering, arguing and flirting men and women… you'd think it was completely normal.
Until you found out they were the human personifications of countries.
Over there was France, trying to grope South Korea while he tried to grope China, yelling at Russia over the clamorous noise about how 'I'm not tsundere, I'm just the oldest and the most confused, aru!… and at Zea's place in the room were America, Australia, England and some other guy, all caught in an argument about the pronunciation and spelling of words.
Everyone knew who was on whose side.
"You bloody yank, how many times do I have to tell you? It's a fucking 's', not a bloody 'z'! You've butchered up the English language, no wonder Iggy hates you! Geez mate, if I were the one who'd raised you, I'd have killed you by now 'cause of what you've done and said about English culture!"
Zea didn't have to look up to know who'd said that; he could already imagine the squint lines on his forehead creasing from his brows and his green eyes lighting up in anger while his two biggest cities bobbed up and down on his head.
"Well excuse me, princess. I'm a free nation who can do whatever the fuck he wants, so go become a republic or something. Or put another shrimp on the barbie! Leave me alone, I chose to do what I want because I'm the hero and a free country, so there, stupid cane toad!"
And there was the annoying, insufferable accent across the Atlantic from his mum, yelling far louder that actually necessary as 'Texas' slid down his nose. Zea looked up to see England and that almost-invisible guy holding them back, so that they wouldn't end up in a brawl that would probably end with Keith's fingers up Alfred's nose.
"First things first, fuckwit, cane toads are Queenslanders, and I live in the ACT. Secondly, I'm practically free as it is, and I have free health care. You'll also notice my lack of gun crime… and they're prawns, dammit! And why the fuck would you put something that expensive on the fucking barbeque?" Keith yelled, his thick Australian accent cutting off the end consonants and dragging out the vowels.
"I dunno, you tell me! What was that stupid nineties ad campaign for then?" Alfred cried, his voice gaining the attention of the surrounding that weren't already looking.
"Because you Yankees don't know what prawns are; you're too thick to see past anything of your own! Get Texas checked out, before they stop working and you get your economy in worse shape!"
"That's it!" Zea cried, and the gathering in the room turned to look at him curiously. "The reason America's shit economy is getting even shitter and his knowledge is getting worse is because he's spending too much time with Iggy! I mean seriously, have you seen the shit those guys have been coming up with lately? The sexual tension coming from them could be cut with a fucking knife!"
Australia chuckled, his dark brown eyebrows pulling together in a downwards 'v' as his white teeth flashed from behind his smile. Sure, he had originally blown his head off when he found out his mum was screwing his best friend and vice-versa… but now, it was all he joked about. That and his politics and their opposition.
"Yeah, Alfie, stop screwing my mum and acting like nothing's happened! It's completely obvious, even Italy could read the atmosphere!"
With Keith's last words, America and England blushed and stared at the floor while he went over and slung one of his heavily muscled and hairy arms over Zea's shoulders.
"Mate, I dunno what I'd do without a bud like you," Keith said loudly, making Zea blush profusely.
Zea replied quietly, more like his usual self, hoping Oz wouldn't hear him. "I don't know what I'd be without someone like you to love, Oz…"
Australia froze, wondering if he had heard correctly, or if he heard what he wanted to hear. His cheeks heated up like sunburn.
"Um… sorry Zea? What was that?"
It was Zea's turn to freeze as he realised Australia had heard what he said.
"Um… I said… that…I … I love you, Oz…" Zea said, even quieter than Canada. He knew Oz would be able to hear him; he'd spent years in the bush sleeping with one ear open and listening for snakes, bats, and drop bears.
Australia smiled. "I thought so. I heard what I thought I heard and I heard what I wanted," he said softly, turning Zea around so his chest was buried in Oz's tan shirt, hiding his growing blush.
"You… you mean… you love me too? In that way? Not as a friend, but as… a… lover? Like Germany and Italy, or Finland and Sweden?" Zea asked quietly, his green eyes widening and blonde curl bouncing happily.
"What'd you think, Zea? How could I not, after our years as friends? Yeah, kind of like them, but… I haven't got a stick up my ass like Luddy, and I won't call you my wife… unless you want me too?" he chuckled.
Zea blushed and shook his head. "Sorry, I don't have any weird kinks like that…"
"Except for sheep?" Keith said, making Benji's face rival a disbelieving Romano's. "I'll wear that Halloween costume again to my capital's centenary, and embarrass the hell out of –"
Benji decided to make Keith shut the fuck up, and brought Keith's head down to his own to make their lips touch in a short but longing kiss.
Keith looked at Benji for a brief second before crushing their lips together again, this time with more passion, wetness and spark than a desert storm at the desert heart of Australia.
Just as they pulled away and caught their breath, Zea murmured something quietly under his breath as lightning struck outside.
"…I love your kisses, Oz…" he breathed, his light voice heavy with emotion.
Australia smiled. "And why's that, Zea?" he said, his deep voice light and lilting with the thunder.
Zea smiled back and placed his hand over the middle of Australia's chest. "Because… they remind me of why I love your desert heart…"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(^J^)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fail ending is fail. Anyone see the subtle Zelda reference? I'll give you a cookie if you can!
Iggy's so Tsundere~~~ oh, and sorry for my Australian spelling, beatches.
Lol it's raining outside and I'm so glad I'm home on my bed and not stuck out in Canberra's bipolar weather :P that's kinda my inspiration for the end of the story, but the original idea was given to me by the plot bunnies when we were learning about the Gallipoli campaign in SoSE (studies of society and environment – kinda like history, geography, business, economy and a whole heap of other shit mixed together).
I've only experienced a desert storm once in my life, but they are probably one of the most beautiful things you'll ever see (except for a green sunset in Firenze or a white Christmas in the southern hemisphere). There's red muddy/sandy water running down the hills, the sky is grey and almost blends in with the dark, dead trees and the lightning shadows everything and cracks like a cat-o-nine tails nine-fold – right at the base of your skull.
Meh. I should probably be doing my science report – it's due in two days and I'm eating and writing fanfics about SoSE topics instead of doing actual work (and as Lithuania says: "Food (and fanfics, in my case) is the easy way to blissful procrastination).
So I hope all you other blissful procrastinators get some work done too….. eventually.
Oh, and I don't actually hate Americans. I just think that's how they'd make fun of each other. Sorry if any of the characters were OOC. I've never actually read the manga, I just watch the anime and read fics. Lol I just imagined Japan taking pictures of them making out. Mmm… yaoi….
Sorry, long ANs :P
OzzieLiber-Tea 3