Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Any of the Characters. Boring, Boring. If I did, I would not write this shit.Warning: This is so bad it may make you want you stab your eyes out. Your have been warned. This makes NO SENSE at all.
Voldermort sits in his evil lair plotting what to use as his final horcrux
"hmm now should i use Nagini. Yes that would be a good idea as she can then live forever with me." Voldermort pondered before a voice interrupted his thoughts.
"My Lord, we have captured Potter."
"Yayyyyyy finally. Bring him in." The Dark Lord dances around his throne room.
Potter walks causually into the room before giving Voldermort a fist bump.
"Sup' snakefaced dude, long time no see. How have you been?"
"Mm I've been good actually. The usual; killing, torture, blackmail, murder yada yada yada. Same old stuff. You?"
"Well same things too to be honest. Trying to avoid being killed and stuff. Oh and I found these new sweets that are amazing."
"Cool, you should tell me the brand mabye I'll get some. Oh wait something new is gonna happen."
"Oh? What's that?"
"I'm gonna create another Horcrux."
"What were you going to use?"
"I was thinking about using Nagini."
"Nah thats wayy to obvious. I mean come on."
"Fine then. What do you suggest?"
"A muggle coin."
"MUST KILL ALL MUGGLES. MUST KILL ALL MUGGLES. MUST KILL ALL MUGGLES. MUST KILL ALL MU-"
"Yes, yes i get it. Think about it though. How would anyone be able to destroy it, if even you can't find it. Your too sentimental Voldie. I've already destroyed three of your horcruxes 'cause they were in such obvious places and such obvious objects."
"Oh. Which ones?"
"Ok well I destroyed the diary. Dumblefuck destroyed the ring and Ron destroyed the locket."
"You still mad at the old man?"
"Yeah i don't trust that old coot."
"Lolll me neither. Well i guess the coin idea has some merit."
"You could use the coin in another countries currency so it wouldn't even be in the country."
"We simply have to catch up more often. I miss these talks."
"Gods me too. You know for a psychopathic Dark Lord your not that bad."
"For the golden boy your not too bad yourself."
"Wanna be bestfriends."
"Duh."
"Lets make friendship bracelets."
"Already got the string."
For the next two hours, the Dark Lord could be found making friendship bracelets with the boy-who-lived-to-become-friends-with-the-Dark-Lord.
They lived happily every after.The End.Wow honestly that is the worst thing I've EVER written. God this makes me hate myself. Worth it though cause it was stuck in my head so yup now this can be read. I already regret this. Let me know if anyone wants any particular ships because I'm thinking of writing a oneshot or twoshot so idm.Thanks so much for reading this trash.LOve you all.