Rey patted her hair in the mirror, making sure her three buns were straight. She turned to her nonexistent mother to ask how she looked, so she had to make do with a "PEEP!" of approval from BB-8. He sounded upset.

"I know, BB-8. I'll miss you too. But I'll be back from school before you know it. Okay?"

BB-8 didn't look too happy, but he rolled to the door, making sad little peeps all the way, and watched as she climbed into her speeder and zoomed away, leaving him in a cloud of dust.

Then he gave an evil snicker. Now he could play with her action figures all day.

Finn was just clicking his locker (combination FN-2187) when he heard a loud clanking a few lockers down. There, wrestling with her locker, was Princess Leia! The most popular girl in school! He hurried forward and tapped her on the shoulder. The girl whirled around and punched him in the stomach. She was, as it turned out, not Princess Leia. She had three buns instead of two. What was that, some kind of new fad?

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry!" she squealed. "I'm just a little high-strung today! Are you okay?"

"Fine, just fine," Finn wheezed, trying not to barf. She had punched right through his armor. "Um . . . do you need help with your locker?"

"No. I can do it myself. Here –" she banged the lock with a wrench. " – hand me that thingy."

"Um . . . this?" he tossed her the metal widget.

"No! The black one!"

"This?"

"No. The pointy black one."

"This one?"

"No."

"Here?"

"No! Honestly, do you know anything about machines?"

"Apparently not."

Finally, she kicked it. The locker swung open.

She glared at Finn, as if he were the cause of her problems. "What's your name, and why are you wearing that?"

"Finn. Um . . . because I'm cold?" Oops,he though, I should have taken off my stormtrooper clothes before coming to spy on the school.

"Well, take it off. You look ridiculous!"

"Gee, thanks." He yanked it off and stuffed it in the trash compacter.

Principal Yoda felt very, very strange. Well, he was always strange. But today felt weirder than usual. Something was wrong with the air, the energy . . .

"Oh no," he whispered. The new kids. Why hadn't he realized? "Quantum Astrophysics, it is!"

"Eh?" Bib Fortuna, who had fallen asleep in the detention chair, woke up.

"Nothing. Go back to sleep."

An announcement boomed over the : "Anakin Skywalker, Padme Amidala, Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa, Han Solo, Rey (uh, I don't know your last name but it's probably Skywalker), and Finn (you don't have a last name either), please come to Principal Yoda's office right away."

"Anakin Skywalker?" Leia wondered aloud, "Luke, is that a cousin of yours or something?"

Luke shrugged. "I have no idea. Never heard of him. Let's just go, I guess."

"Uh-oh," Han said, "Old Principal Yo probably found out about the speeder bike incident!"

Padme walked into Principal Yoda's office, followed by Anakin. Rey and Finn were already there, and Leia, Luke, and Han were on their way.

I hope he doesn't make me eat that root stew again,Luke thought, entering the dim, green room.

The air shimmered. Reality itself was quivering. Everyone stared at each other – something was very wrong.

"Wrong, something is." Yoda voiced their thoughts, appearing from the corner. "Completely kablooie, the space-time continuum is! You –" he pointed a bony green finger at Han, "should not be here –"

"Ouch."

"—at the same time as you!" He pointed to Anakin. "and you –" he pointed at Luke, "—shouldn't be here at the same time as you!" Rey.

Everyone was silent (for once). Old Principal Yo was right. Something was terribly wrong.

"I've got a bad feeling about this . . ." they groaned in unison . . .

BOOM!

The school exploded, quantum forces colliding with each other, and then all was silent.

A figure, enshrouded in a black cloak, rose from the ashes of what had once been the school. His lips curled into a grin. The scheme had worked! It had all worked!

"Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha . . ."