Dear Beth,
Hello my sweet girl. I've been missing you every minute of every day since the accident. I don't remember much of it, but the moment I found out you were gone, my began to crumble into tiny pieces. However, the piece that contained you stayed intact because you will never fall. You'll always be here, somehow or someway as long as you're in my heart.
Things have changed since you've been gone. Your dad began writing music a lot. Most of the songs are about you. About us. About our family. I can see the pain in his eyes as he writes. He misses you so much, Beth. If you could see him now, you'd run up and hug him. That simple little hug would make him the happiest man on Earth.
I had a dream about you last night, which was what motivated me to write this to you this afternoon. You were dancing in the flowers in the meadow behind our house, like you used to when you were three. You looked so radiant, my sweet little girl. Your golden hair shone like a star in the sunshine. I miss brushing it before bedtime, like we used to. I could make a list of one million things I miss about you, darling. Writing them all down would be the hard part, but you know I'd do anything for you. I miss the bright smile you wore every day, because it made me proud to be the mother of such a positive little girl. Even through your pain, you'd smile. I'm so honored to call you my daughter.
Today, the rain is hitting the window in your room in which I am writing this to you. It's been raining for almost a week straight. I wonder what you're doing up there, above those clouds that pour rain down on us. I often wonder what you're doing. Both your dad and I do. We talk about you all the time, reminiscing about all the best times we got to share in those short eleven years. We often think back to the night the power went out when you were eight. You got so scared, so your dad lit what seemed like a million candles all around the house, built a fire in the fireplace and told us a story about how the power only goes about because all the spirits stole it all to have a party up in the sky. You laughed. I can still hear it. So infectious and beautiful.
Oh Beth, I just miss you. I miss hugging you, kissing you goodnight. I miss taking you to school, picking flowers in the meadow, just hanging out. I know I can't bring you back, but if I could, I would in a second. There is nothing more I would want. Some days feel unbearable. I can barely make it out of bed and I just want to cry and hug you. Then I feel you around me, pushing me with your positive energy, telling me to be strong for you. I feel you all around me and I know you're happy.
When the sun shines, I know it's because you're smiling or laughing. Maybe you're playing cards with grandpa Puckerman, or chasing around our kitten. On those days, I feel like I can talk to you and that you can hear me. Maybe you can, I'll never really know. But all I can do is hope.
I better go, Beth. Your new baby sister is crying. Maybe she's crying for you. I promise I'll write again tomorrow, but until then, take care and smile for me, darling. Let the sun shine again.
I love you with all the love in the world, my darling daughter.
Infinite x's and o's,
Mom.
Quinn put down the pen and looked out the window with a sigh. A tear streaked down her cheek.
As she finished folding the note, she ran her hand over her words and placed a kiss upon it.
Outside she went, in the pouring rain. She wandered into the meadow. In her right hand was a ribbon, which on the end a pink balloon was sitting. In the left, the note. With a bow, she tied the note to the string of the balloon.
"Make the sunshine, my girl," she whispered into the rain. "I miss you." And she let it go, watching it float into the clouds.