Another story….hopefully my second thank God! I still hope you enjoy this and give me honest reviews! Please….R&R! (Read and Review) Thanks….. :]
I woke up and saw the bright light of the sun beaming from my window, my eyes hurt from crying I just couldn't bare the pain anymore he was a dignified person in school and he deserves the best he doesn't deserve a worthless girl like me, who was he kidding? Choosing her over me it was the right choice why would I still hesitate that he would turn back now? I'm just so naïve
I sat at the side of my bed and looked at my alarm clock surprised to see that I woke up before my clock even alarmed, which would only happen to me once in a blue moon maybe because if I closed my eyes once more it would just cause me great sorrow and I can't bare to shed another tear again. I stood up and headed for the bathroom, there I washed up and I saw my reflection at the mirror. My eyes were red and it looked obvious that I cried the entire night, why couldn't I get over him yet? The fact that he was never mine and that I never owned him why was I this desperate and this hurt? Is it possible it was more than simply just a crush? Is it possible…that I'm in love with him? No, it's not possible
I took the towel and wiped my face, I made my way down the staircase and there I heard my mother preparing breakfast and as always nii-sama was still asleep and drooling in her bed
"You're up early Kaho, something wrong?" a tone of worry was in her voice I could tell
"I'm fine, I just couldn't get enough sleep that's all" I replied to her and gave her a good morning kiss on the cheeks I could smell the delicious food
"Mmm, smells great is it done yet?" I asked
"Soon, it'll be done in a few minutes" she gave me tender and sweet smile I smiled back
I went to the leaving room and sat down at the sofa, I didn't feel like turning on the tv I wasn't in the mood, I didn't even feel like going to school anyway but what was I suppose to do? I only wanted to go to school to see him the one and only reason asides from associating with my friends and where I could play freely that was the main reason why. But now that he has found someone else what's the use of attending anyway? Lessons didn't much concern me, I find it a torture always sitting at my classroom and listening to my teacher's boring lessons…as always, studying never interested me nor did it found interest in me but still my mother would always scowl me "Education is the key to success it opens new doors for you and if that key is lost you may never open those doors" I smiled knowing she was right 'Mothers are always right' I thought my mother always wanted what was best she would never lead me something to my misery, she was caring, kind, loving, and understanding I loved her I really do.
Time passed so quickly and as I knew I was already wearing my school clothes I didn't want to attend school. I never wanted to enter the gates of the one place that made my world crash and stumble I didn't want to return to hell, which I always thought of ever since that day…
~Flashback~
"Everyone I would like you to meet Akiko Sakomoto, she is a new Music student and will be joining the concourse" Kanazawa-sensei exclaimed as she steeped into the room every one was all shocked
"Whaaattt!?" everyone was in shock except Tsukimori-kun since it was the Akiko Sakomoto the great violinist who as talented as Len she was beautiful and smart she's got everything: Beauty, brains and talents and was rich and famous she was almost perfect
"Nice to meet you all" she bowed to show a kind gesture
"And I'm sure you will enjoy here Akiko-san" Yunoki said and gave her a warm and sweet smile she in return, smiled back as well
"And besides that, she is also Tsukimori-kun's fiancé candidat" Kanazawa-sensei said, we all gasped even Len
"F-fiancée candidate? H-how could that be?" he was so much in shock and so was us.
"You're mother never told you huh?" replied Kanazawa-sensei, Len shook his head
"Please let me explain" Akiko said "I'm sorry for surprising you all for this especially Tsukimori-kun" she glanced at him who made me jealous of somewhat "You see Ms. Hamai didn't formally discuss about this she only me and my parents knew, me and Tsukimori-kun have been childhood friends and we were always spend the day playing our violin right Tsukimori-kun?" He nodded
"But I still don't understand the whole engagement thing" Hirara was scratching his head
"My parents have already decided for me to get married before I turn 17 and since he knew how Tsukimori-kun is a very determined person towards his music what more if he was over me?" she gave him a smile which made him blush "So father suggested an engagement for me and Len" looks at him "Is it alright if I call you that? You will be my husband anyway" she asked. In my thoughts I was thinking 'what?! His husband? This can't be happening'
Len was still in shock but gave his answer "I won't mind…Akiko"
"Great! But now you know that we are engaged in spite I don't have any ring but that can be settled soon are you mad for not knowing earlier?"
He was quiet for a while "Yes I am for my parents not having me a say in their plans for 'my' future" he answered with dismay
"I see, but you knew that this was coming right?" she said
He gave out a sigh "Yes"
"Wait? Now I'm totally confused" Ryoutaro groaned me and Fuyuumi-chan just looked at each other
"You see" he started out "My parents were planning that I should get married at 17 but I still didn't agree with the thought of it I was still young to have a family and a wife, I didn't know how to handle much expenses and with that great responsibility towards a woman but they didn't consider that as a good excuse I had to argue over that, they were already hiring some candidates but I never expected it to be…Akiko" looks at her "We were just friends…nothing more" he gave out another sigh "Why did you agree to this?" he asked her
"Because I like you!" she said without hesitation just straight out
End of flashback
Ever since then, they were always together like eggs and ham they never were apart the way she confessed to her made it sound so easy why didn't I do that before? Why would I still hesitate about attempting to tell him the truth, she did it straight out not even being a nervous wreck. I knew that tears were about to come out but I held them back, I didn't want to cry anymore I couldn't take it anymore.
Does Tsukimori-kun even love Akiko-san? I'm sure off that, I mean if he didn't he would have canceled their engagement already, they wouldn't be walking to school, they wouldn't be having lunch together or play duets together during breaks if he didn't love her and I'm 100% sure that Akiko-san loves him as well.
I walked along the streets and making my way to school, I looked up and saw the beautiful blue sky birds were flying up above me and forming a v shape I gave out a smile but that smile didn't contain any happiness I just did that to make myself better and to not feel the pain I needed to be strong. I'm a few feet from the school's gate and I just stood there with my head low I looked like a statue, I couldn't move my feet I wanted to return home and lock myself in my room and just sit in one corner and cry, cry, cry that's all I can do right now I'm helpless. Then I felt a hand on my shoulder I looked up and saw Hirara
"Don't just stand there like a statue c'mon you'll be late for class" he gave me smile but that wasn't the smile that I longed for
"I-I'm sorry, Hirara-san you want to walk together?" I asked and gave out a fake smile
"Sure" he said with full of glee. Kazuki was a person that never failed to always cheer me up, he was always there by my side like Ryoutaro and the others they were always there for me to keep me company they were my loyal friends or should I say best friends
We walked together inside the building and as I entered the nightmare begun. There they were her hands wrapped around his arm and they were walking together looking like a happy couple glued together and can't be separated I knew that he was already happy with her and he didn't need me anymore he already has someone to love him and to take care of and she was already the one, she had everything: Riches, fame, beauty, talent and she was intelligent and smart not to mention she was fun and a sunny person like me but still….we were different I will never be like her and will never be the person whom he will love for the rest of my life. When I thought of that I just bowed my head and my chest became heavy and my heart was aching I knew that it was already being hammered into pieces I felt that every night and day.
"Don't worry Hino-san; I'm always here for you" I heard it and lifted my head to him
Again he gave out a smile "Me and the others will always be at your side we will never leave you" on him saying that made me feel lighter and the pain was slowly starting to ease "A-arigatou, Hirara-san" I gave him a smile, this time a 'real' smile "I know that you guys will never leave me" I said
"And remember, if you have any problems feel free to approach us anytime ok? Don't be to timid about it" he reminded me, I gave him a nod
I waved to him as we parted ways and I was entering my classroom
"Good morning Kaho-san!" Two girls greeted me as I made my way to my seat
"Good morning Mio, Nao" I greeted them
"Well your early today Kaho-san" Mio said
"Yes, I agree when did you become an early bird?" Nao teased
"I'm not always late you guys!" I blurted out, they just laughed
"Hey! What's so funny?!" I gave them a what's-so-funny look
"Sorry Kaho-san we just never expected that you would look so cute when you're angry" she gave a slight giggle
"Forgive us, Gomen we just want you to lighten up a bit Kaho you have changed ever since you know what happened. I was silent then Mio took my hands and held them tight
"We are your friends and we want you to be happy Kaho-san we hate seeing you always crying and frowning right?" Nao nodded
"And besides you don't look pretty when you frown you should smile always" she said, I pouted
"Aww, c'mon Kaho it's early and you give us a pout?" Mio said
"Well you guys didn't give me a nice morning…."
"Of course we did! We always do! We did that to make you smile Kaho stop being a party pooper and give us a smile!" she was commanding me
"Please Kaho-san, just one smile I'm sure you'll feel better" Nao said to me
"Please!!!" Mio looked at me with those 'puppy dog' eyes whenever she did that I would always give in
I just sighed and gave them a simple smile
"Do it like you mean it" Nao told
"Fine, fine I will" I groaned, and gave them a sweet smile even though I didn't mean it just to satisfy them
"That's better" they both hugged me, I was surprised at first but hugged them in return I was lucky to have great friends like them all of them and I love them
"Alright class to get the square root….." (And so on….can think of a good lesson so just picked math…even if I hate it. Gosh!)
Its math already our first period, God I hate math (just like the author haha!) I hate the teacher, hate the lessons, I hate numbers and my mom suggesting I should take Business management as a course in college which you handle all those finance and such. How could I handle finance if I couldn't even handle my own allowance in my piggy bank and spend it with nonsense things that I find so interesting and me to handle a thousand Yen (or whatever the currency is in Japan I dunno) what would you think I'm going to buy with a thousand cash? Or a million?! Mom can never get me sometimes but she could almost read my mind, maybe it's a mother's instinct. I just sat there in my seat pretending to listen to my Math teacher as he scribble numbers on the board; I just stared at it blankly as my thoughts were flying to someplace else "Class get out your notebook and copy the equation" Sensei ordered, I took my notebook on my bag and opened it to a fresh new page I took my pen and started copying it "Eh? This is so hard" I thought, well it is since I didn't pay any attention in class anyway I'll manage somehow…I think
I started writing down the numbers "1209 square root of blah…blah" then without any notice I suddenly wrote down his name on my notebook and decorated it with hearts all over when I cam to my senses I scribbled out the name and crossed it out 'What was I just writing?!' I ripped the paper and crumpled it "Anything wrong Kaho?" Nao asked who was sitting behind me "No, I'm fine" I made it sound like a whisper for sensei not hearing us or else we were in trouble. After copying the equation I closed my notebook and placed my hand under my chin and stared outside the window.
Why was I still thinking about him? He is about to get married, he doesn't need you anymore Kaho he has someone else just get over it already!? I was shouting in my mind, my brain is telling me to forgive and forget but my heart indicates something else it tells me to fight what I love, have the courage to confess to him you just can't turn your back now go fight for him! Fight? How can I? I am a weak girl who plays the violin not that pretty nor that rich, I'm just an average school girl to him and compared to her? It was like comparing a peasant and a princess, I am weak and she is almighty, she is rich and I am not, she has everything and all I have is an empty pocket, she is respected by people while people would still criticize me for my playing. So he wouldn't have second thoughts on agreeing to the marriage and the engagement. Again my chest felt heavy and my heart was aching I could feel tears in my eyes but it wasn't the right time to cry not in school not with all these people who will just make fun of me, Be strong Kahoko! Be strong!
"RIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGGGGG" The school bell 'Saved by the bell!' I said in my mind, I got up from my seat and stretched out my arms and gave out a yawn "Waahh…"
"Are you tired Kaho-san?" Mio asked me
"Just a little sleepy Mio" I replied
"Well you did wake up early, earlier than your alarm clock to trigger right?" Nao said
"Yeah, you're right" I gave another yawn "So shall we eat?" I asked both of them
They nodded, I took out my lunch and the 3 of us exited the room to eat at the table where we usually gather with Fuyuumi-chan and Amou-san
"Finally, you came! I am starving already!" Amou-san whined
"Sorry for the wait you guys, our Math teacher gave us some out of this world lessons and assignments it made our head explode" Nao reported them
"Well, s-shall we start?" Fuyuumi-chan asked us
We all nodded and sat at the table took out our lunch and started our conversation
"Hey, Semestral Break is near what do you guys think of a good vacation?" Amou-san asked she always wanted plans to be set out straight and at the last minute
"Hmm…well what about the beach? That's nice right?" Mio suggested
"That's so old school Mio let's have a new gig" Nao disagreed, yeah she was right we would always go to the beach every vacation and emphasis on the every.
"Let's plan something different for once" Amou-san said
"I-I know…." Fuyuumi-chan spoke up "W-we could all stay at my Villa f-for the whole semestral b-break a-and we could do some o-outdoor activities and could have some s-slumber parties and such"
We were all silent about her idea
"Great Fuyuumi-chan!" Amou-san hugged her
"That's such a great idea! We can do some camping, and parties and more since you're villa is like a huge mansion" she said with a wink
"But is it alright if we stayed at your villa?" Nao asked
She nodded "My parents will be out of town for a business trip and I'm sure they won't mind if you guys stayed at my villa they will be pleased with that…since" she grew silent
"Since what?" Amou-san asked her in chorus
"W-well…" her face turned red "S-since you are t-the only f-friends that ever v-visited the place a-and I am m-more than glad that y-you would agree"
"Awww…Fuyuumi-chan" Mio gave her a sweet look "Of course we would! We wouldn't miss it for anything!" she smiled at her
"Right, that would be very nice Fuyuumi-chan!" said Nao "don't you think Kaho-san?" glancing at me. I was just silent
"Kaho-san" I was just quiet
"Kaho-san!" she shouted, I was startled and came to my senses
"S-sorry I was thinking about something, what were we talking about again?" I was thinking about Akiko-san and Tsukimori-kun again
Amou-san gave out a sigh "About spending the whole vacation at Fuyuumi-chan's Villa she will be very glad if all of us came" she explained, I looked at Fuyuumi-chan
"Is it alright?" I asked her
"Yes, very much" she smiled at me "W-will you join us Kaho-san?"
All of them were looking at me and anxious to hear my answer
I gave a little laugh "Of course Fuyuumi-chan I will absolutely join you" I gave a smile
"Great! But we shouldn't just keep this to ourselves you know we should let the others know about it was well" Amou-san popped out another idea as always we were just all confused
"Huh? Who 'others' are you talking about Amou-san?" Mio looked confused
"You all know what I mean like Hirara-san and the others" she gave us a familiar look
"But then, that would also include…." They all turned to me, then in an instant I knew what they meant
"Will it be alright for you Kaho-san to invite them?" Fuyuumi-chan asked me in worry
I was silent and didn't give any reply
They all paused and our group became quiet silence fell upon us
'Should Tsukimori-kun and Akiko-san join us?' I asked myself 'it would be so selfish of me to just say 'no' for an absurd reason, what's it going to be Kahoko? Make a choice already'
"If you don't want to Ka-"
I broke Amou-san's sentence "It'll be fine, Amou-san I wouldn't mind if Akiko-san and Tsukimori-kun came along" I forced a smile
"You're lying Kaho-san we could tell" Nao looked at me, she knew me too well
"You shouldn't force yourself in doing this just for him, he was the one that made a mistake don't blame yourself" Mio was trying to get my hopes up but it didn't work
I bowed my head
"Maybe i-it wasn't a good idea" Fuyuumi-chan sounded hurt
"No! No! Fuyuumi-chan it was a good idea, let's just make it a girls vacation no boys that way we won't have to worry too much huh Kaho-san?" Amou-san said
My head still low and didn't utter a word, I was silent
"Let's just think of another trip!" Nao suggested
"No!" I lifted my head up to face them "Please don't worry about me to much"
"But Kaho-san…." Amou-san started
"Stop it" I trailed her off her sentence "I know you guys are trying your best to make me feel better and I thank you all for that, I am glad that you are all here and the idea was great we should have a vacation at Fuyuumi's villa all of us should be there even Akiko-san and Tsukimori-kun, I know it still pains me that I cannot accept that they are happy with each other and love each other I will never change that between them I could never interfere"
"But you love Tsukimor-kun" Mio trying to argue
"Even if I do love him he can never love me for his heart has longed for someone else and that 'someone' is and always be Akiko-san, Akiko is a kind person and I am sure that she will take good care of him like I would and this is the best way to get over Tsukimori-kun no matter how badly it hurts me I can still manage that pain inside of me because I know I have loving friends like you" I glanced at them and I continued "The heart is never fair, so is life it's just a balancing act it's a cycle you fall in love get hurt and move on you will do the same thing over and over again what's the difference?"
"The difference is" Amou-san exclaimed "that even if you say that you have moved on the heart will always say different meanings from the brain what you're saying is your mind speaking and not the heart Kaho-san"
"Is it true? Is it my mind talking and not my heart?"
I was silent and just stared at my lunch that was already half finish is it what my heart says? To move on and just let go off the past?
"We're sorry Kaho-san for ever brining up the topic" Fuyuumi-chan apologized. I look at all of them with a straight face "I know you guys won't believe me that I am alright with having Tsukimori-kun and Akiko-san stay with us during the break but I can't run away forever right? You guys all know that I would have to face this and this may be the solution to that and all I ask is just for your consideration and just bare with me" I was already pleading to them about the idea I was nearly teary eyed
They all looked at one another and Amou-san gave out a brief sigh "Alright Kaho-san, if this is what you want then all we have to do is just approve it and we will be at your side no matter what" I smiled big "Yes, and if anything happens bad we will be here all the time no worries" Mio hugged me and I did so in return, I am glad that they understand me with my decision they are all very understanding. I faced them "Thank you very much" I stood up and packed my lunch "Let's go before class starts again"
"Aren't you going to practice Kaho-san?" Nao asked me, I turned to her "Maybe later when I'm all spirits again" then I walked away not even giving a smile as I leave, am I this helpless? Isn't there anything I could do to help myself? I pity myself so much; I am a poor girl who only wishes to have the guy he loves in his arms and to caress his beautiful and handsome face
"Because I like you!" it still haunts me in my head she confessed to him and didn't care if we were there, if I was there but it bothers me so much. Her first day of school and then she just blurts out to him that she like him? I hate her! Wait, why do I hate her? no I didn't have the right nor the privileged to hate her absolutely not he isn't mine, he never was mine nor never will be mine, she owned him and she will love him no matter what.
I am just a foolish high school girl who is dreaming of having what she wants but somebody already took it, what else was I suppose to do?.....but cry
Chapter 1 done! There are more okay so just wait, school will be very busy now so I hope I could finish it in time….and please give me reviews (honestly) thanks!
-moonshine-79