A/N: So, this work is maybe a bit weird. I wrote it with the theme 'Hell' in a hour, while the writing nights on the Francophone forum. Some parts of this OS are not canon. And, spoilers alert, it's about homophobia. I don't usually write things like that, but I find it's kind of pretty (well, better in French because I had some problems with the translation). I don't exactly know why but I loved writing it, and I do love this work. I hope you can love it as much as I do. Also, I hope my English didn't screw it up! Enjoy!
When I was little, I always imagined that when I'd be a grown-up, I'd find my prince charming like my mother. She had found her soulmate, my father, and I remember seeing them smile and look at each other with love all over their faces. I told myself then that I had to find this love that satisfied them so much, this beautiful love. I was going to find it in my prince charming. He would be even more handsome than in the fairytales which were told to me, the evening at the end of the bed.
I have known the love of two parents who loved each other with a passion that no one could be blind of. Yet, that didn't prevent my mother to be violently taken away from me. And with her, my Dad's love became less manifest. This gruesome day, I've not only lost my mother, I've also lost the privilege of seeing the beautiful beauty of love and my father's happiness. So, I swore to myself to find it again. I swore that, someday, I'd find this bright love, this prince who was certainly waiting for me somewhere.
In the end, I noticed that love was much more complicated than it seems to be… What a naive girl I was! Oh, love? Of course, I did find it! I had some beginnings a little… let's say, complicated, but I found it. Princes charming, of course, don't exist. I realized that pretty fast. So, I had no chance to find mine. On the other hand, I found a gorgeous princess from the southern water tribe, master of all four elements: my best friend. The more I got to know her, the more I liked her, the more I was curious to get to know her, the more I wanted to be close to her, to be there for her. And the more I reached my objectives, the more I wanted. I wanted to be more present, I wanted to support her. I wanted to dry her tears when she was crying, be the end of all her torments. I wanted to hug her tightly against myself to console her, be a warm comfort. I only wanted her happiness, for her who had to fight for the happiness of world. She's my best friend. I wanted to protect her from the whole world, that world she has to protect, that world which threw her in an infernal fight, which made her see hell from closer. But she's strong. Her bright mind drowns in her ocean-colored eyes, whose foam of the qualities caresses the pupils of her eyes; she's more precious to me than anything else. Her body reflects also her strength, though it had to get itself back on track more than once. Yet, she was here, despite all these hardships, still her muscles really well drawn on her dark skin. Secretly, I dreamt of tracing them, of caressing her skin, of feeling her curves… And when my eyes were drawn to her lips, I imagined kissing them… It was at that moment I understood I wasn't trying to be her best friend anymore, I wanted to be more. I fell in love with my best friend.
When we were alone then, I was forced by this love to confess at the risk of losing her. I knew so much consequences! It wasn't the first time I thought about it. But I couldn't hold it inside of me, it was too strong, it was eating me up. I owed her honesty. I don't know by what miracle this extraordinary woman felt the same way. I don't know by what miracle she can love me as much as I love her. At this time, I could have easily allowed myself to believe that everything was going to be just like the little girl I was once dreamt, but…
"They are inhuman!"
"Criminals!"
"Diabolical creatures!"
"Down with demons!"
"You deserve to die!"
"Burn in the flames of hell with your kind!"
"Go back with the spirit of chaos! We don't want monsters like you here on Earth!"
I hold my head high in spite of all the insults which have been common currency since I started dating Korra. I know her hand is in mine and I hold it tightly to contain the tears of a heart assailed from everywhere. I try to control my breath, as well as the sobs which will soon flood my face. I try not to listen, and to tell myself that these words are just words, that they don't mean anything. I try not to listen the painful beating of a defeated heart, because of a love that no one has deigned to respect. But, my breathing is irritating me, my face is hardly containing a few tears, the words are piercing me faster that ice pics, which would be even warmer, and my heart is irregularly pounding, savagely beating in my chest, screaming in my ears, emptying me from my energy.
I glance at Korra. She's busy outdistancing the people who are attacking us with her airbending. Yet, I see in her huge blue eyes the extinguished flame of a burning sorrow. Finally, we reach the door of my mansion. Without a second guess, we step inside and we double-lock the door. Here, we're safe. Here, nobody can harm us.
Our hands finally free themselves after having held themselves painfully, too painfully. We both are in the lobby. None of us is moving after having faced the storm of hatred outside, staring at nothing, minds wandering, trying to find some balance. In the end, I look up, laying my eyes on her. Her look, firstly empty, connects with mine. We don't move, we don't have enough strength for that. I see sadness in her eyes, I see then tears threatening to fall within a blink. Without thinking, I hurry by her side, hugging her tightly. I don't want her to cry. I don't want to see her so hurt.
She hardly lets me hug her a few seconds before pushing me away. Why? I'm lost. I just wanted to comfort her. She doesn't push me away usually. What if… What if she couldn't take it anymore? What if she didn't want to live that situation anymore? She was treated like a goddess, and because of our relationship, people see her as a creature from hell. How could someone bear it? I don't know. I don't even know how I can bear it myself every day. I don't know how someone cannot break.
That's it then. It's the end… I look at her and my eyes start to water. This idea kills me. My heart won't be able to handle anything more. I won't be able to handle anything more. I love her too much for that. It's the only thing that keeps me alive: my feelings for her. But I love her enough to know that it's better for her if she's not with me. It's too hard. It's a hell every single day, a continuous harassment, an endless fight. But as my thinking keeps going, making me be grave, I feel her lips on mine. And then, I don't know if it's my tears or hers which are falling down my cheeks, or maybe both.
"They say that we deserve to burn in hell? Maybe. But before then, the only thing I'll allow to burn is my love for you," she whispered in my ear before pressing me against the wall, as she is kissing me one more time.
I couldn't agree more.
When I was little, I thought that love was a feeling so pure and so beautiful that it made life easier. Today, love has made my life become a living hell, but it's a hell in which I'm happy to burn.
A/N: I might be a little sensitive with this OS, because it's kinda important for me, but you can leave a review and tell me what you thought! We know that the Avatar universe won't allow that. I wrote it before Turf Wars, anyway. I hope the 'hell' thing wasn't too much... I don't really feel confortable with it in English, but I tried! Anyway, if you liked it, tell me!
