Disclaimer: I do not own the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants books
Starving for Perfection: Carmen's story
Carmen sat back in her chair and licked the last envelope. She was finally done, and it had only taken her two fucking hours to address, stamp, and lick 50 envelopes. Carmen had always been slow when it came to getting important things done though. She lightly touched her hands over each envelope, feeling the smoothness of the paper under her fingertips. She traced the names, remembering faces from her past.
The death of her father had hit her like a speeding train. The feeling seemed unshakable, and she walked around as if she were a zombie. Tibby, Lena, and Bridget would sit with her for hours in her room, wearing the faces of worried teenagers who grew up too fast. Carmen wasn't acting like Carmen usually acts. Instead of forceful tears and screaming fits of torture and pain, she walked silently through the halls.
News of Carmen's father's death was a surprise that no one saw coming. When Lydia called Carmen's mother to tell her that her father had been in a terrible car accident, Carmen heard her mother scream. It had been days since the accident, yet Carmen could not seem to find her emotions. She took responsibility for the funeral announcements, because her mother and Lydia were too devastated.
Carmen bundled the envelopes into one hand and set off to mail them. She passed her mother in the family room who was balled up in the corner of the couch with a Kleenex box, watching Full House reruns. She quickly closed the door to her apartment, breathing heavily, as if she were being suffocated. As she ran down the stairs, she started to feel like it was more and more difficult to breathe. Her thoughts were bombarding her, racing through her mind, and she felt herself weakening from the pressure. As soon as the EXIT sign came into view, Carmen pushed as hard she could, bursting into the fire escape. The sun beat down her back as she gasped for air.
A siren had gone off, but Carmen didn't care. It was a faraway sound in her head, like a tiny beeping that seemed non important. She crossed the parking lot of her building and mounted the sidewalk. Her cell phone rang and the sounds of Nelly Furtado's new song reached her ears. The screen told her Bee was calling, and she flipped her phone open.
"Hey," Carmen said lightly.
"Carm, where are you? Tibby and I are coming to get you for ice cream."
Carmen sighed. She hadn't been hungry since the death. She had already lost 4 pounds. "Thanks, but I have some things to take care of. For the funeral."
There was a pause, and then, "You have to take a break from all that. You need your friends right now."
"I'll just see you guys later, okay?" Carmen knew her voice was on the verge of breaking
They said goodbye to each other and she hung up the phone. She realized Bee had gone through the same thing with her mom, but somehow, she didn't feel a bond with her. It seemed as if Carmen had left her body, and she didn't know who this new, strange person was.
A/N: the first chapter is just kind of an introduction to the story, and what leads Carmen down the path of anorexia. She suffered a loss and it's mainly the root to her future problems. The chapter that follows will be set a month after the funeral, and the chapters after that will just follow. I hope you like it, and come back to read more! Leave me comments, they are much appreciated.