A/N: This is the companion to chapter 7 of All The Theories! (which is not posted yet) and takes place at the end of season four. This little piece of M rated fiction is brought to you by myself and my lovely partner in crime kimmiesjoy.
The eye of the storm
She stands there, in the silence that had settled over her, arms wrapped tightly around herself, the robe slipping past one shoulder. Her chin falls to rest on her bare flesh and she can feel the goosebumps rise from the damp hair clinging to her back and the warmth of her breath across her skin...
She is done.
She has had enough...more than enough. Her life has taken enough beatings, knocked her on her ass one time too many and now...she just wants to stand here. Be still and normal and for once not feel like she is rushing to catch her breath.
She just wants to breathe.
She hasn't been able to truly breathe for such a long time. Just draw in a lungful of air, letting it fill her up from the inside, re-energize and renew her. And standing here in his loft gives her all the air she needs.
And space.
All the space she isn't so sure she wants anymore.
What is the point?
If it means after everything she has been through she will end up standing alone. She doesn't want that. She doesn't want to spend the rest of her life wondering and lonely as she fights the darkness, raging against the oncoming storm.
She wants to fight whatever battles lie ahead with someone willing to stand by her side.
There has only ever been one person strong enough to stand with her. The one person who will back her up, give her fortitude and grace. Knock her on her ass for her own good if necessary. Her able knight, her defender, going into battle for her in secret. Risking everything.
His life, her protection.
She shudders, because if it weren't for him...she'd be dead. She knows that, deep down on some elemental level and it hits her in wave after shuddering wave how close she came to losing him, losing herself.
"Oh...Kate." She hears, and suddenly there is no distance between them.
She lets him envelope her, wrap both his arms around her middle as he presses her to him. She feels no hesitation, holding nothing back as she sinks her cheek into his shoulder and her robe slips further. But she's warm here, and she lets out a sigh.
This is what she's needed. No comforting stares, or soothing words. But the feel of him safe and protecting. Protecting himself, as she keeps him close, her heart open and refusing to let him go.
She tucks her hands up, squishing them between her chest and his, curling herself into his body and the warmth, the loveit provides. Kate lets it wash over her and she can feel his heart beating against her fists. The rhythmic dance giving her strength with each pounding thump and her own heart tries to stay in time.
But it's fluttering, the calm before the storm...maybe it's the eye of the storm. They have come through a lot and now they need to make it to the other side, but they are trapped here for a moment in the quiet...
Catching their breath.
What it means? She is not actually sure anymore.
A tear escapes her, rushing down her cheek and dripping into his shirt. "Shh," He soothes and she feels the cold air cling to her as his arm moves up, and his fingers brush the side of her face as he pulls the hair back, tucking it behind her ear.
"Thanks." She whispers rubbing her cheek on his shoulder, and closing her eyes.
"It wasn't safe for you there." He says, tugging her in closer.
The room falls silent aside from her breathing, and the beat of his heart beneath her fist. She can feel him too, the rise and fall of his chest, the heat of his body molded close to hers. Closer than they have ever been. And from this moment on she doesn't think she can ever let him go.
"Don't do that again. Ever." She says, voice deep, and yet raspy. Another tear falls and she neglects to wipe it away.
The image of her gun in his hand, and the guy falling to the ground flashes in his mind. He clamps his eyes shut. "I don't plan too."
He breathes in deeply, her whole body moving with his until he settles. And somehow she's wrapped even tighter, and his head is buried in her hair. She feels cold and hot all at once as she realizes both her shoulders are bare, her now dry curls tickling the exposed flesh. She shivers, and his arms rise, one pressing at her lower back, the other across it, brushing aside the gentle curls. She is engulfed by another shiver when suddenly his hot breath is at her skin, so close, and she can feel the thick, hot exhales through his nose.
But it's not out of fear, lost adrenaline from today's events, but a pick up in tempo, the air filled with tension, brewing and sizzling out all at once. Prickling at their skin and sending a fire through their veins at the feel of one another, so close, and yet not nearly close enough.
He loosens his hold on her, dropping his head, cheek rubbing against the back of her head, and then lowers his mouth to her shoulder. She inhales sharply, and hums out a soft sigh as his mouth moves, pressing a tentative kiss there.
Her fists unclench in the little space there is between their chests, her hands spreading out, palms against the thumping heart that keeps time with hers. Another soft press of his lips and she breathes in again, skin quivering in anticipation before she feels the heat of his tongue as it lathes at her flesh.
She draws in a deep breath, the musical twang in her heart loud, making it hard for her to ignore. But she doesn't want to. He answers her, sending the inner vibrations of her body haywire before he feathers kisses, moving closer to her neck.
Kate lifts her head looking up into those beautiful blue eyes of his, and she nods ever so slowly once.
His hands leave her back then, sweeping up to cup either side of her face, and she meets him in a soft kiss. It's simple, just the quick press of lips against each other, but as one moves just a little, the other compensates, opening their mouth and clutching at the back of the others head.
She moans first, and then his mouth opens over hers, and their tongues slide together not a duel, but equal. One feeding off their other with the same amount of need. He breathes her in, humming and sending the thrum through her entire body, pressing her every line of his being as she tastes him.
He tastes like longing, heated fire that consumes her, something she will never be able to quench. The need is too great. Too passionate to ever be fulfilled. But in this moment, she's more than content, more than satisfied and undeniably sated.
For all it's worth, all the waiting, the healing and the distance she's kept between herself.. her heart and his, she lets her robe drop to the floor. Feels the soft fabric caress her skin on the way down until her naked flesh is exposed to him.
She hears him take in a breath, his lips stilling over hers as the robe lays at their feet. Their mouths hover over one another's, hot and anxious, and she chances a look. Kate smiles softly when she sees that his eyes are clamped shut, a look on his face she isn't sure she can define.
But it doesn't matter, she doesn't want to define him. She no longer needs answers, just the warmth of him against her skin is enough.
"Castle." She whispers, holding onto the buttons of his shirt, slowing popping one out.
His hands slip from her hair, down her bare shoulders until his hands cup her elbows. She pops another button, mouth agape, face calm and yet her chest is heaving. Castle presses his forehead to hers, opening his eyes as she continues to unbutton his shirt wordlessly. She slips her hand inside, smoothing her palm flat against his hot flesh, rising up until her hand cups the side of his neck.
Biting her lip, she nods again, pulling on him until his lips descend on hers and his hands slide down her body. She gasps into his mouth when the tips of his fingers press at her ribs, moving down until they grip at her hipbones.
She tugs on his shirt, the last button coming free and pushes it off his shoulders, letting it slip from his body until it meets her robe. Everything has been slow up until this point, but with his entire chest at her disposal, she dips her head, nipping at his skin, meeting him as he surges forwards pressing his hips into her.
She meets him again, sucking on his collarbone and pulling him backwards at the same time. His hands snake upwards now, tickling her sides until they rest under her arms. His thumbs run along the underside of each breast, and she hums, tilting her head back as her ass bumps into something.
She forgot where they were, why she is here. And as he gently forces her back, his mouth sucking at her neck, hands kneading her breast, Kate falls back onto the spare bed. His hand guides her downwards, splayed over the bare flesh of her back, and he hovers over her, not touching except for those lips and his tongue which move down.
She arches off the bed when his tongue lathes agonizingly slow along her navel, and he presses her down gently.
"Castle." She breathes, abs quivering as she tries to seize control of the feelings rushing through her body. But he's making it worse, traveling the length of her body until she forces his face to hers, lifting up on her elbows and capturing his lips.
"Kate?" He answers in a breathy rush, her own name a caress against her lips before their mouths meet again. She feels the bed dip and settle under his weight, the warmth of his skin when his chest presses into hers.
She moans at the electricity that shoots through her. Their own unique crackling energy that sparks anew when she opens her mouth and deepens the kiss. Pulling him as close as possible, but it's not nearly close enough.
She needs more.
Needs him more than she ever has before. And not just in the most obvious of ways, as he soothes her with his mouth. She wants him in every way possible, she won't wait anymore.
"I need you." She barely gets out, bending one knee and sliding back onto the bed more, tugging at the waistband of his jeans to get him to follow.
His skin glides against hers as he rises up, his entire frame looming over her. Kate bites her lip, unbuttoning his jeans and unzipping them before pushing down his thighs as far as she can go before he helps, dropping them at the foot of the bed along with his boxers.
There is nothing else between them. Not the waiting, the healing, or interruptions. And now, not even the nuisance of clothing stands in their way. She smiles up at him, hair cast across the bed, and leans up to kiss him lightly, deepening it and pulling him down to her when she realizes that there really is no more wait.
But as he falls to meet her, chest and then torso connecting with hers she tenses.
He feels it. The stillness of her body underneath him, and he cups the side of her face, brushing her hair out of the way so he can look on her fully. "We don't have to do this now, Kate. I-" He whispers honestly, his eyes showing nothing but the truth.
"I love you." They say at the same time, the heated breath of their declaration mixing between the two of them.
His head drops to her shoulder and her eyes close. They both breath in and a heavy sigh escapes before she opens her eyes again.
"I love you, Castle." She says again caressing the hair at the nape of his neck.
"You have no..." He starts, rising up. "Idea ho-"
"Shh." She says as her fingers slide into place under his chin and she lifts his head to her face. Not caring about anything but the need she has to soothe away the ache that still lingers in his voice.
The traces of doubt are gone, washed away with each new touch and lingering caress. When she finds his lips she hums another request for him to be quiet along the open line of his mouth before she envelops him with her kiss. Drawing him up from where he fell against her, she shifts her hips underneath him so she can wrap herself around him.
Her legs feel longer than he remembers as they stretch around his own, twining him with her body in the most intimate of ways. She has laid her life in his hands on more than one occasion, but now, as she gives him her heart and her trust it feels like so much more. The most precious gift she could ever give him.
Herself.
Kate opens to him, warm and ripe and everything he has ever imagined. Her declaration, her I love you's, heed him no further hesitation and with one last sweep of his tongue along with hers, he sinks slowly into her.
She arches off the bed, meeting his hips and moaning deep in her chest. His body shudders at the sound of her. His body slides firmly against hers, holding her against suspended as waves of intimacy, of pleasure lick at her tired skin. He brings her to life with each movement he makes, steady and true, full of love and he rises again, quicker this time fueled by the sounds she's making.
"Castle." She breathes, finding his hand beside her on the bed, clutching it tightly in hers. She laces their fingers together, wanting him touching her in every possible way as she meets him again, thrust for thrust. She hums, nipping at his mouth and quivering at the overwhelming spark between them.
Partners in all sense of the word now, finally, and he gasps as he pulls back slowly, just barely before sinking down again, hips coming to rest flush against hers. "Ohh, Castle." She gasps eyes wide and body arching against him, driving him deeper.
His head falls to her hair, and she buries her face in his shoulder, panting, hot breath on his skin. Her eyes stay wide and she can't quite find the ability to pull him to her mouth, but she wants to kiss him, to taste him. To bathe in him completely as he moves, each slow thrust of his body so much more than she ever expected.
Instead she kisses his neck, her mouth open and eager but messy. There is no artistry behind the kiss, she's too consumed by him, by the fire he is igniting between them. As he withdraws again, his tongue dancing across the soft skin under her ear she rises high off the bed. Her back becomes a graceful arch as she twists, her eyes finding their joined hands high above her head on the pillow.
His free hand slides effortlessly into the space beneath her, holding her weight away from the bed as his fingers play with the dips and grooves of her spine before their combined weight forces them back down onto the mattress.
Kate smiles as his fingers grip her firmly, but she can't relax into it properly, the feelings building within her are too intense. She strains to meet him, her body tight and winding tighter every time he moves.
Every slow slide of his body sends him a little bit deeper, into her heart, into her mind, he pushes past everything and leaves her quaking for more. Kate fights through the haze of pleasure that swamps her mind, wrapping her leg around his thigh, high and tight as she draws him in. Sending him deeper still in every possible way.
"Kate.. Oh Kate." He gasps.
Castle feels the strain of her body, matching his own, as the muscles in her neck quiver under his lips. He moves over her skin with his tongue as his rotates his hips, feeling her gasp into his neck, feeling the soft and the fluid come back to her slowly.
He peppers kiss after kiss to the tense lines of her jaw until he feels the muscles relax and her body shiver. Head to toe the wave washes over her as Kate is tingling and consumed again and again, until she can't take the rise anymore, and she just lets herself fall.
Her head rolls back, shuddering breaths leaving her lips in sharp intakes. Chest heaving, body tensing in the most delicious of ways around him. His head falls to her neck as the crashing waves of pleasure that drag at her body entice him and pull him under. She snakes her hand through his hair, rougher than she means to when he falls apart, her nails catching at his scalp as she she gasps his name.
Each aching and heaving thrust leaves them both in awe, and somehow Castle moves through the rocking of their bodies to find her face. His hand cups her cheek, watching every cascade of euphoria that floods her eyes, pulling her in close so that he can kiss her.
Their mouths join through the last downward spirals as they slide against each other, heaving breath mingling with shallow moans and sobs until she relaxes completely under him. Her arms twine around his neck, fingers in his hair, slick with sweat as she brushes it off his forehead.
Her hands move to to his cheek her thumb brushing gently over his bottom lip as she speaks "All the ways you know how to love me." She sighs "Your mouth is like a miracle..."
He hums a laugh across the pad of her thumb, kissing gently at her skin. Her hands rest over his face, holding him close as she stares into his eyes.
"Your words...they.." Kate shakes her head smiling and biting her lip at how corny this will sound."...guide me home Castle. Your kiss, it sets me free. Everything you are and everything you do...just...everything...you are my mi..."
His mouth closes over hers, telling her in every way he knows how that she doesn't need to make declarations and speeches. Everything they need to share already lies between them, tangled in the sheets. Their love is wrapped around them as they are wrapped around each other.
He pulls away from her gently, their lips parting on a sigh. Reluctant to leave the warmth of her body he turns, falling onto his back. He lifts his head in surprise when she follows him, her hands warm and tender as they brush across his chest. Kate kisses his shoulder once, burrowing into him before she lets her head fall over his heart and closes her eyes.