For Character Diversity Boot Camp – Zacharias Smith - #5 Magical

For Fanfiction Scavenger Hunt – #18 A Trio's Era Fic – Set During the War

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

Do you not wonder?

I bet you are wondering why I ran away that night of the battle. Why I pushed away first years in order to flee to safety.

I am shy; I know that is hard to believe considering what people have to say about me. They say I am untrustworthy, lazy, horrible, cowardly, not really screaming shy here with these adjectives. But I am. I just show it differently, where people like the beautiful Hannah Abbot hide in their books and make people love them for their amazing talent and cute shyness, I feel I need to push them away. I don't want people to come up and say hello like they do to Hannah. Who can't help but smile politely and blush in the cutest way. I would hate that. I need people to stay away, if anyone bothered to get close, they would understand how unstable I am, how little ideas can scare me for months.

I am not tough like Mr Potter and his band of heroes. I am just a Smith, barely even a name worth saying any more. I was an outcast from a young age and am an outcast now; I just make it more well-known these days.

I use to relish in stories that started with clichés like "once upon a time in a land far away...", that took you to places you could only write about, that not even dreams could satisfy. Then became part of those fairy tales, taking away on a steam train that was fire engine red and along an aquamarine coloured lake. Taking by invisible horse drawn carriages to a castle that vibrated with the amount of magic locked away inside it. I felt fortunate to be part of something so amazing, so perfect.

But like my muggle school I was bullied, attacked because I wasn't like them, even if I am in Hufflepuff, the loyal house, what a joke. I will admit though, sometimes I let Hannah talk to me, sometimes she will join me and we will speak softly, while she looks around in case anyone sees her with someone like me. Typical, but when it is someone like Hannah Abbot, why should I care?

So the more of an outcast I became the more afraid I was. Afraid mostly of the world around me, the one made up of everything perfect that instead used power to harm, not only me but everyone was affected by the war at hand.

Didn't you say you wanted to know why I pushed all of those first years away? To fall behind and get taken to their deaths? I was terrified. I am not proud of what I did, nor would I ever do it again. But it happened I pushed people out of the way and I ran, because I could not match anything they could do. So I abandoned magic. A power that was a fortunate gift to a muggle, that was alive within tales of fiction and burning within real life.

That is my rant, my worthless rant on why I am a coward, why I am shy, why I no longer believe in fairy tales. Or magic.