Authors Note: Since the story never officially FINISHED, I decided to write a prologue showing how Turtle/Soulja Spirit Buu jackson killed Vadermort and the Death Eaters.

I would also like to get one thing clear: I can spell, I can do grammar, and I am not racist homophobic or sexist. Any stereotypes or bad grammar and spelling in this story is due to the fact that it is written as a parody sequel to a story with horrible grammar and spelling and horrible stereotypes. And I'm trying to emulate that. So no, I am not being offensive on purpose. Let's begin!

Mi name is Soulja spirit Buu Jackson or just turtle, and I wus getin reddy to go back 2 da future, cuz Imma wiserd and I went bak to the past to stop the evil Vadermort from make fried chikin not exist which was the source of my magic. And met Jesus and made frends wit him. So I sayd gudbye to them and went to da fyuture

I showed up at hogwats but then I saw...DA DARK LARD VADERMORT!111111

"evil Jew how ded u get here?" He answered evily " I went to da future wright before you and now I'm gonna kill you wit da wiserd stone!AND ALL MY DEATHETTERS!"

and den...ALL TEH DETHETTERS SHOWEDUP111111!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!111!2!7 their wuz dracula, hitler, wolfman, and abunchof ofther deathetters I didn't know. Except fur deer founder, the deevil. They all started shooting at me wit their wandz and Magik guns, but I puled owt my wand and made a wandblade and devflekted dem all eGscept for vadermorts Magic electrocity balls

"Now imma kill u annoying nigga!" butt den ghost hairy potter showed up!111 he was gost becus sum DETHETTERS killed him

"What da fuk?!,11111626616171829?" Vadermort got so distracted he didn't relize I stabbed him wit my wandblade!1111

"Oh NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!?" And den he bled out and die, and da dumbledoor of the whole skool came out and kild da rest of da DETHETTERS

"mr. Dumbledoor, tank u!when do classss start?" da dumbledoor looked at me

"dis yeer is ovher, you can cum back next yeer to learn more magic and then you have five more yeers after dat. Go home"

So den I went home and waited till second year

Authors note: Now we can begin the...let's say "story" properly. It's less of a story and more an experiment of how much can I make with the original bad fanfic this is from. Nonetheless next chapter things pick up.