Rock On!

The mice population of Mars had many reasons to celebrate their victory against Plutark and the Catatonian Empire. While these two groups still attacked, the attacks were in vain, because Stoker's Regenerator, which he had made rechargeable thanks to the green and yellow tetrahydrocarbons he used, terraformed Mars and made it safe for all mice. They also celebrated the fact their planet's heroes were huge rock stars on Earth with their band, the Martian Freedom Fighters.

Keep in mind that the Martian Freedom Fighters were not leaving Earth to return to Mars because they were rock stars, having plenty of competition from the SWAT Kats Band and Sonic JAM, as well as Wildcat City's own big names, such as David Satterfield and his Wolfpack, the Bengal 9 (of which WARCAT's brother, Tom, was the drummer), and the Hijackers (an all-lion heavy metal rock band).

Leo the Patriotic Lion, having connected with the Biker Mice thanks to his network of contacts that he set up in case of a desperate emergency (which later were added in as allies to the G-52s), was having to adjust to the rock environment because of this, even though he had not lost his grip on the music he was famous for composing (which was evident in the fact he still wore his green drum major's uniform quite a bit of the time). "It's not my taste," he told the press in an interview, "because it was not the music I was born to compose. As a consequence of it, however, I am adjusting to being exposed to it as a norm in my life, and I am encouraging my tiger counterpart, Tom the Patriotic Tiger, to do the same. And they really are great rock stars to hook up with. It also means I am adjusting to some of those other popular genres as well, regardless of whether it is jazz, disco, MoTown, R&B, soul, and the music considered 'oldies' by the public even though the proper term for it is 'bubblegum' music. You know, like the music performed by the Banana Splits or the Cattanooga Cats. Anybody remember them?"

Having finished his latest contribution of a lead vocal with his song "Grease It, Grease Pit!", Modo could not help but smile all the day long when Leo asked him about it. "I haven't had many chances to sing the lead, and the bass guitarist is usually taken for granted. But not me!" He laughed to himself.

"Stoker, do you feel they ever take you for granted?" Leo asked. "I have felt that when it comes to rock groups, the bass guitarist and the drummer are the ones most likely to be taken for granted because all eyes are on the guitars and the keyboard."

"I haven't put much thought into it," Stoker replied, "because not all drummers can sing while playing the drums, but I can. It's not a big deal to me, though, because Shadow the Hedgehog does it, and Fango does it. I'm glad to be part of the top 3. By technicality, thanks to his tune he calls 'Beat It!', Rimfire does it also."

"Anyone else do that?" Rimfire asked.

"Not that I know of, but there are plenty of them, I'm sure."

"True."

Throttle walked over to his bike and sat down on the saddle. He took a list and looked at it. "Yep," he reported, "just as I thought. We peaked at #1 again with 'Grease It, Grease Pit!', and Modo, we have you to thank for it."

"Hey, what are bros for?" Modo replied. "I'm happy I got to sing the lead vocal. This is the first time I have done so."

Then Vinnie's antennae began glowing. "Uh-oh! Trouble!" he shouted. "Let's see what the radar says. He put on his helmet and used his radar technology to pinpoint the source of the crime. Throttle and Modo did likewise. "Who's that tiger in black?" Vinnie asked. "It's obviously not WARCAT."

Leo took a look on one of the screens on Stoker's computer. "Oh my gosh!" he exclaimed. "Do you remember CRIPTOCAT?"

"You mean that 18-year-old that joined SUPERCAT's forces, of which one is you?" Rimfire asked.

"Yes, that's him. What you soldiers are seeing is him in his mild-mannered alter-ego of Nathan Knight, not to be confused with the cowboy named Nathan Knox that they call 'Nickelback Nathan' thanks to his odd habit. Of course, the two have different last names, so that helps; Knight and Knox."

"Nickelback Nathan we've met," Throttle replied. "We helped him, his bros, and Moo Montana thwart an oil-scheming scheme created by the double act of old stink fish and that fatso Eggman character that hates Sonic the Hedgehog. In fact, Sonic led the attack."

"Well, my hat's off to him!" Leo exclaimed, making the appropriate gesture with his hat. He then put it back on his head and resumed his thoughts. "Anyways, you have some more competition coming your way. Nathan has gone into the music industry, and at 18 years of age, is the nation's newest heart throb. He put the 'furry' in 'furry fury,' so named because he actually sings a variety of genres. He could be a heavy metal rocker one minute and an R&B or jazz crooner the next. His debut single was entitled 'Helpless as a Kitten Up a Tree,' which he did in the classic style of the 1950s. His debut album following that just had his name as it title, and that single was part of the album. He typically wears black clothes because that's what furry heart throbs in this town wear. But he's all the 'All-American Heart Throb' of his town, as hailed by me, because he is proud of this country's history and its flag, and his music reflects that. He also can make a song out of nonsense and it becomes a huge hit. He accompanies himself on the electric guitar, which his best friend taught him to play. Apparently, that terrorist you call Lawrence Limburger is holding him for ransom. It's probably just bait to trap you."

"Then it's time to ROCK…" Throttle spoke up, beginning the famous battle cry of the Biker Mice.

"…and RIDE!" everyone shouted, gunning their engines and racing to the scene. Rimfire followed them on his bike.

"Go ahead," Stoker called. "Sing this one without me." He laughed at his own joke. Charley also laughed, then explained to Leo her role in the band as the keyboardist.

To the total surprise of the Biker Mice, Nathan was handling the whole thing professionally. "He's not panicking about it?" Vinnie exclaimed. "Oh, buzz kill! You know what that does to my machismo rating?"

"Stowe it, Vincent," Throttle replied. "We got to get him away from Limburger."

"Besides," Modo added, "there are several reasons he's not afraid: 1) he's also the CRIPTOCAT; 2) he's used to being bullied around because his class had a bully, and that bully's only ambition in life was to kill him; and 3) he's a tiger."

"Excellent!" Limburger smiled as he watched the Biker Mice approach with his binoculars. "It seemed the bait was successful. Our little lab rats are heading right for my trap. And from this trap there shall be no escape. Besides, sometimes I get a craving for old-fashioned traps. What shall you say, Knight?"

"I say you should start using a better deodorant," Nathan replied, holding his nose at the smell of Limburger's body odor.

"Oh, you could tell?" Limburger replied, pretending he hadn't noticed his body odor. "I must have the air conditioning repaired at once."

Because his abilities as the CRIPTOCAT allowed him to do a multitude of things simply by snapping his fingers, Nathan was struggling to get his hands free from the cuffs Karbunkle had placed on him, so that he could snap his fingers and depart for freedom.

"What good is it of you to call yourself a heart throb anyway?" Limburger continued. "You haven't even murdered anybody!"

"That's not what that means!" Nathan objected. "It means I became famous in the music industry as a teenager. And what better place to do it than this town, whose driving force of life is music?"

"Music? Blah!" Limburger sneered. "All it is by my book is disturbance of the peace. There's no way to destroy it, so once I kill off the Biker Mice, I shall have Karbunkle created a gadget that will hypnotize all the world's leaders to give me their natural resources in exchange for keeping their music alive." Nathan's face lit up with anger as he started to snarl.

"Yes. It's cruel!" Limburger grinned. "It's clever. It's…AAAH! The Biker Mice!" His last remark was in response to the Mice firing their weapons at the hideout he had set up. (He had gone into a debt he couldn't pay off just to keep rebuilding his tower, and all his construction minions had gone on strike, so he settled for temporary mobile hideouts. But no matter where he tried, the Biker Mice always found him.

Throttle used his pistol and Vinnie used his flares to cut the ropes holding Nathan hostage, giving Nathan ample time to escape. He jumped on the biker Rimfire was holding and snapped his fingers so that he would be wearing a helmet. "Safety precaution, you know," he said.

"Excellent," said Rimfire as he proceeded to draw one of his own guns and fire on the hideout, with his uncle Modo playing backup with his bionic arm.

As the Mice escaped from the hideout with Nathan home free, Limburger panicked over his hideout burning to ashes. "Another expensive failure!" he cried. "Will I ever win? Why can't they leave me alone just once in my life?" He sobbed his heart out.

Back at the Last Chance Garage, Nathan thanked the Biker Mice for their help and reported to Leo what he saw. "The reward was $2 million for my release," he said. "What I can't say if he wanted you to be the one to pay it or not."

"Doesn't matter," Leo replied. "I'm not paying them a single cent. Not on their life!"

"Thanks for your help, Biker Mice, for getting me out of there," Nathan said as he turned to the terrific trio and gave a thumbs-up. "I could have gotten away myself if only I could have snapped my fingers, but Limburger saw it coming and bound me so I couldn't do so."

"Hey, next time you fall into a trap like that, just give us a call," Throttle smiled. "In the meantime, you want to join us for some hot dogs and root beer, even though you might not want that?"

"Don't mind if I do," Nathan replied as the group left the Last Chance Garage to find the nearest Maximum Mighty Melt, the city's premiere fast food chain. "Just don't be surprised if a bunch of people want my autograph. It's the whole 'rock star in black' thing, you know."

"I know how you feel, bro," Throttle nodded, "and I wear black all the time."

THE END


Biker Mice From Mars © Rick Ungar, Tom Tataranowicz, Tom Tataranowicz Animation, Brentwood Television Funnies, and everyone else who owns the rights
SWAT Kats and Cattanooga Cats © Hanna-Barbera, Warner Bros., Cartoon Network
Sonic the Hedgehog © SEGA
SUPERCAT, WARCAT, CRIPTOCAT, Leo the Patriotic Lion, David Satterfield and His Wolfpack, and the Bengal 9 © me