Introduction

Looking back, I can see why they say that hindsight is 20/20. I'm not smart, I'm not strong or talented. The only real special thing about me is that I was singled out by one of the worst dark wizards of the last century, Voldemort himself. Time and again we fought until it finally came to a head at Hogwarts. I really don't like the idea of people getting hurt in general but especially not on my behalf. I've lost so many people and after I finally defeated him, I lost my will to go on.

Chapter 1: Rebirth

"Harry James Potter!" screeched Hermione. Her voice rang through the Head Boy/Girl common room snapping my attention back to the present.

"Hmm...?" I grunted.

"Have you even been listening to me? You need to study." She sighed as I showed her what I thought of her 'advice'.

A few months ago, Voldemort thought he would be able to attack Hogwarts as a preemptive strike. If I hadn't seen Voldemort's plans through my inner horcrux the Order of the Phoenix would've been annihilated. The exact day Voldemort was going to attack was a mystery to everyone, so we were all trying to live each day like it was our last. Headmistress McGonagall opened up Hogsmeade for any student to visit, cancelled all classes and quickly evacuated as many students as she could under the age of fifteen. Ron and Hermione finally admitted their feelings to each other one night in Hogsmeade in a very intimate way. They gave the glossed details to me and apparently after they kissed they decided inhibitions were in the way and after several glasses of firewhiskey they rented a room. I, of course, didn't follow their example because I thought it would be wrong of me to even think of Ginny throwing caution to the wind like that especially if everything turned out to be alright.
Of course the DA immediately reconnected and trained more seriously than ever before. Though progress was made by everyone Ron, Hermione and Ginny were all exceedingly powerful for their ages. I was even more powerful than any of them thought possible. I trained day and night. I went without food, water even sleep. Ginny worried about me sure, but nobody understood why I was doing what I was doing more than she did especially since making sure she was going to make it out of this whole bloody mess was damn high on my to do list.
When Valentine's Day came around I had taken Ginny out to the lake to propose but right after she said yes, a simple cutting curse came out of nowhere taking her out of the battle before it began. All hell broke loose but I remained calm. If there was anyone who could possibly save Ginny it sure as hell wasn't me, so I asked Ron to take her to Madam Pomfrey.

FLASHBACK

"Ron! Take Ginny inside and get her to Madam Pomfrey! Hermione, you tell the teachers to get their arses out here and back me up. You guys know how this works now move!" I screamed. I didn't bother to make sure that they had, in fact, left yet. After all I had a big problem in front of me. "PROTEGO ULTIMA!" A black dome of fire erupted around the Hogwarts grounds, scorching several hundred death eaters and killing so many more. I raised my right hand and summoned as many dementors as I could and immediately had them attack as many Death Eaters under the orders to take as many souls they can.

"Harry! We're here. Everyone's ready for you to give the order," said McGonagall.

"Well now everyone is here. I wasn't sure if this was invite only but if so then I hope you can forgive me for gate crashing." Dumbledore had strolled up behind McGonagall without anyone noticing. He wasn't alone either, every known member of the Order of the Phoenix as well as every Auror the Ministry of Magic had. The problem now wasn't a problem of numbers but instead a test of skill. "Well Harry? Give the order or come up with a new plan."

"Alright everyone, listen up," I started. "I'm not sure why I'm in charge here but the priority right now is make sure that either Voldemort falls or that he does not take Hogwarts. Apparently, there are even Slytherins who want to fight so that gives us twenty students from each house plus the fifteen teachers gives the Hogwarts Battalion thirty-five members. The Order seems to be about three hundred and the Aurors put our total at almost ten thousand. Give or take around five hundred, we stand about even as of right now so if anyone can fly or get on a broom too attack that's fine, but our aerial forces should be more defensively focus so only those with high reflexes and powerful shields should be in air right now. Next would be deciding how we get to Voldemort, so on that front will be both Dumbledores, Nicholas Flamel and, of course, myself since I have the last piece we need to defeat him here with me. The teachers should be able to at least hold off the strongest Death Eaters until the Aurors and students deal with the cannon fodder. It hurts me to say this so callously, but everyone needs to shoot to kill. If you get injured fall back behind my dome. They will probably be using lethal spells only so everyone should fight in pairs at least. Time is of the essence once you cross that line so do not hesitate or you will die. Now on that cheery note let's move out."

As soon as I finished speaking to the crowd I turned and ran straight out into the throng of enemy assailants confident that those who stood beside me would do their jobs and more than likely succeed. Unfortunately, the Death Eaters decided to use only the Killing Curses. I knew that I was a shadow mage by that time and there was one thing that made it all worth it: I could stop the curses and even send them back at the caster. Everyone froze as I lifted my wand straight up and absorbed the curses into my wand. I smirked as I shifted my aim to the nearest Death Eater and shot a continuous beam of green light into as many black hoods as I could. Some dodged sure but it seemed like most of them were too stunned to move. In the universal hesitation, Voldemort and his inner circle shot their own killing curses. Time seemed to stop as I watched those closest to me die. Albus, Aberforth, Nicholas… and Ron. I barely saw how he moved to save Hermione. At a dead sprint from the front doors of the school Ron took six killing curses. Three for Hermione and three while his still moving body collapsed. I was hit sure, but I just discarded the horcrux inside of me and stood still in shock of seeing my best friend die. Suddenly there were hundreds upon hundreds of killing curses in all directions. The students and Aurors on the brooms were using stunners and cutting curses so that any friendly fire would be minimal. I was angrier than I had ever been but surprisingly I was also very calm. I was facing Voldemort and winning until he started using bombardo maxima. I tried to deflect as many as I could, but I couldn't stop all of them. Explosions lit up the night sky as body parts began to fly.

This continued until the only allies I had next to left, besides the ones flying above, were Hermione, Tonks, Remus and McGonagall.
"ENOUGH!" I screamed. "WRATH OF DEATH!" Black spikes erupted from the ground in such large numbers that the remaining Death Eaters became blood stains at most. I pointed at Voldemort and concentrated fiercely on him. A single black spike erupted from the ground piercing him completely through from his loins and out the top of his head.

With it finally over I ran as fast as I could to get to Ginny only to find that the curse used was in fact Sectumsempra, a dark curse that only Snape knew the counter-curse to. Ginny was dead by the time Ron got her to Madam Pomfrey.

END FLASHBACK

Countless lives were lost. Voldemort had even killed Dumbledore. To this day I still believe that the only reason I beat the bastard was just to make sure Ginny could rest easy. Looking back though, I recently have begun to think that I was too soft on Voldemort.

After the battle we found out that Ron's dad had become the Minister of Magic. Nobody likes to be the bearer of bad news, but I had to tell him about the death of every one of his children. The details of the fight were really hazy, but I knew that every Weasley child was there. Bill died from a spell that made his head explode, one of the bone explosion spells. Charlie was hit with a killing curse and was easily the most merciful death of all the kids. Percy had been gutted by Fenrir Greyback. Fred had his heart summoned right out of his chest. George was the target of one of Voldemort's explosions. Ron was a hero having taken six killing curses, which didn't just save Hermione but also his child, or more accurately he never got hit by any of them. Instead they collided with each other sending some sort of shockwave rupturing several of his organs. Ginny died from blood loss.

I asked Madam Pomfrey for a Sleep Potion that would last for about a week and, even though she didn't like the idea she gave me a vial of a black liquid that was supposed to be taken little by little. I ignored her and drank the contents as fast as I could. When I woke up I was given the Order of Merlin S-Class, which gave me the title 'The Hero of Light' much to my dismay. Ron, Hermione and I had been deemed 'The Golden Three' for heroic actions in the direst situation. This had all been done by Arthur Weasley, who had just won a last-minute election deciding whether he should stay the new Minister of Magic. She and I were given some odd amount of money as a reward for achieving such titles.
It's been about a year since and I've never been lonelier. Sure, I now officially had a fan club of many witches and wizards. I was constantly being sent photos of women with marriage offers. There was even one from someone in the ministry saying that I was allowed to marry as many women as I wanted and included a list of one hundred and seven women who had signed up to share me as a husband. Needless to say, I waved them off. It actually became hazardous for me to even walk around Hogwarts since everyone with a vagina seemed to want a child with me and as such tried to take me off to be some sex machine.

Life with peace was odd. It was getting annoying for me. I had been trained by Dumbledore, The Flamel's and several of the advanced Order members during the war. I was currently top of my class, Head Boy, Quidditch Captain. To top it all off, I was the most eligible bachelor to every woman I had ever had a conversation with. Hermione was due any day now and finally convinced me to at least get somewhat closer to someone. So naturally I chose the one that seemed the least attracted to me: Nymphadora Tonks. As it turned out a friend was what she needed since Remus had been killed by a new werewolf he was trying to keep company on two days ago on the full moon. It's been about four or five months since his death and one week since she told me that the reason she and him were so close was because she wanted to be in love with someone other than me. After she said that she disapparated and I haven't seen her since. Sure, we exchanged several hundred letters since I had become infatuated with her.

"Harry..." whispered Hermione, "Please talk to me. You're my best friend and I'm worried about you."

I was writing in my journal. I've never been without my journal for as long as I could remember. It wasn't just any journal either. At first my writings would just disappear after I finished a page and it wasn't until halfway through my first year that I found out that I had accidentally cast two enchantments on it when I was six. The first one was to make sure nobody could read it without my express permission. For some reason that I still can't figure out that included me until I found out that I had put that enchantment on it. The second one made it so that it would never fill. Every time I hit the last page in the journal it would add another page as the one I finished disappeared from it. When the pages disappeared, they went to a series of journals that rested on a shelf at Grimmauld Place. The first half of that spell was put on by Dumbledore who had been the one to give it to me. I added the second half in my second year when I came across it in a library book.

"Don't be," I said as I shut the journal and walked out of the room. I did my rounds around the castle before I shadow traveled to the Three Broomsticks to meet with Tonks.