AN:Well guys and gals this is my first fan fiction ever...I am a smut writer by definition. My first love of writing is and always will be Erotica,but I have admired so many fine works of fiction and reviewed my fair share that it has showed me that I can branch out and write about those that I watch and read about all the time...so without further ado,be gentle...lol. Peyton's POV.
Disclaimer:I do not own One Tree Hill....If I did Lucas and Peyton would NEVER be leaving...Shame on you Mark
I have decided that being away from the only home I knew was no longer possible for me. I am lost and alone and tired of being by myself. I just quit my job today and as I sit here in this window I can't remember why I stayed away so long...why I wanted to stay away and be this person who I don't recognize. The tears I am crying are bittersweet with the memories of the one day I let all my dreams leave me alone in that room with the C.D. I made Lucas sitting on the pillow next to me. I know that my fears and his stubborn pride are why I can only say why I stayed here for these four years. I can honestly say I tried to move on,but I know I did love Julian. I loved him but not like I love Lucas. I wanted so much to be strong in my belief that I could stop loving Lucas. That I could truly find a man whose love could ease him out of my heart....out of my soul. I close my eyes and I can see his face,those blue eyes looking down at me with all the love in his heart. My happiest moments in my life all have Lucas in them.
"Imagine a future moment in your life where all your dreams come true. You know, it's the greatest moment of your life and you get to experience it with one person. Who's standing next to you?"Once upon a time I asked him that. I died a lot inside when he said Brooke,But I swallowed my pain for the sake of Lucas' happiness. I wanted him to be happy even if it meant I was alone. I never guessed in a million years that he would tell me that it was me."It's you."Lucas said as the streamers and confetti sailed all around us...."What?"I replied."When all my dreams come true, the one I want next to me. It's you. It's you, Peyton."he said. I have loved him for five years. And I lost him all with one word. Why did I have to say that one word. Why did he have to leave me all alone that morning after I said that one word. I pray everyday that I can have a chance to change it,a chance to take that word away and then our hearts would not have broken. I still love him so damn much that I can't seem to move on.
"I want to go home. I miss everybody, I can't remember the last time I wasn't wanting to cry Brooke." "I want to leave and never come back here. Los Angeles isn't my home." "Peyton, are you sure about this?" "Yes, Brooke I told my boss I quit and I have already packed up and now I just got to finish sorting out what I am keeping and what's to be shipped." "I have let so many things just slip by me and for me to be happy I need to finally go home." I said. "O.K. Girlie it looks like we are going home to Tree Hill,whatever it takes I will get it done and see you there." Brooke said. "See you soon B. Davis. I miss you." "P. Sawyer Tree Hill won't know what hit them. I miss you too and your scrawny ass better be there to greet me."
I hang up the phone and I can't believe that I am actually going home. I wish....my eyes close as I sit at this window and think back to memories better left alone. My hands are holding HIS book....I don't remember when I picked it up but I know the last page by heart without reading it..."At that moment my triumph was not a state championship, but a moment of clarity."..."Suddenly it was as if the roar of the crowd, the echo of the final buzzer, or the cheers of my teammates were sounding from a thousand miles away. And what remained in that bizarre, muffled silence was only Peyton. The girl whose art, passion, and beauty had changed my life. In that moment, my triumph was not a state championship, but simple clarity. The realization that we had always been meant for each other, and every instinct to the contrary had simply been a denial of the following truth. I was now and would always be in love with Peyton Sawyer."
And with that thought echoing deep in my soul,my heart cried out and I whispered to myself.... "I can no longer deny the following truth,I was now and would always be in love with Lucas Scott"
Another AN:Should I continue with this......or leave it a one shot?