Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Twilight or New Moon. They belong to Stephenie Meyer. Please don't send evil vampire penguins to kill me.

"Hey, Edward?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"Can you help me with this Trig problem?"

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"

I look up to see Edward running out of the room at a human speed, flailing his arms in the air and screaming bloody murder.

'That was weird,' I thought to myself. I still needed help with Trig. 'Who can I ask for help?' Carlisle was at the hospital and Alice, Esme and Rosalie were out shopping. Jasper seemed to be my best bet. I mean who would ask EMMETT for help?

I made it down the stairs, only tripping once. Luckily, I landed on a large pile of clothes Alice left on the stairs. Sometimes having a friend who could predict the future was very convenient.

I made it into the living room where I could hear Jasper playing a video game. He may seem quiet and shy but once you got him playing a game, you realize just how loud and rude he can be. I stepped into the room and just narrowly missed being hit by the controller, which Jasper had thrown at the wall after losing the level. He picked up the controller and kept playing without even apologizing. How rude.

I looked by the fireplace and what I saw shocked me...

Emmett was sitting in the big plush chair, wearing glasses and a robe, reading a large book, and smoking a pipe. I stared at him until he finally noticed me. "What's your deal, Bells?"

"You're...ummmm...I didn't realize...you...READ?!?!?!?!?"

Emmett sighed and put his book aside, "You see Bella, I know that everyone thinks I am some kind of oversized dummy with no brain, but I really am quite intelligent. I just find it much more interesting to be stupid."

I stared in awe at him a few moments longer but soon remembered the reason I had come down here. I walked over to Jasper. "Jasper." He didn't respond. "Jasper," I said a little louder. Still no signs of life. "JASPER!"

"Jesus, Bella. You don't have to go Alice on me. What do you need?" Jasper asked annoyed.

"Ummm... I needed help with my Trig homework, do you think you can help me?"

Emmett burst out laughing. "Jasper...smart...he's...HAHAHA...I can't believe...HAHA...he's so...STUPID!!!!!" Jasper gave Emmett a dirty look, scrunched up his face and started working on the problem.

After ten minutes, Emmett finally stopped laughing, and Jasper STILL hadn't finished the problem. I looked over his shoulder to see what he was doing, and what I saw wasn't a math problem. It was a bunny. I mean, don't get me wrong, it was well drawn and kinda cute but, what does a bunny have to do with TRIG?

"Uhh...Jasper?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"What does that," I pointed to the bunny, "have to do with that," I pointed to the trig problem.

"The bunny was cuter," Jasper said innocently. Emmett once again burst out laughing. I would have laughed too if it weren't for the fact that Jasper was completely serious. Wow, that explains why he is always so quiet. I mean if I was that dumb I'd shut up too. But how can you go through high school so many times and still be that dumb? I wonder if Alice knows about this...

"I tried to tell you Bella, but you didn't listen," Emmett said calming down a little. "Give me the problem."

After a few minutes I had an answer and a complete understanding of the problem. "Thanks Emmett." Who would have thought that Emmett was smart? "Hey, Emmett?"

"Yes Bella-Bo Ella?"

"Does Edward have a problem with trig?"

What's up with Edward? What could possibly make him run away at the mere mention of trig?

Find out next time!

-Lovely Penguin