A/N: Ok so I was thinking while I was in math that there are so many perfect Liley stories so I decided to add some trouble into the mix.
Disclaimer: I do not own Hannah Montana or the Michael Buble song Call Me Irresponsible.
Oh and italics are flashbacks
Call Me Irresponsible
Miley Stewart strutted into her office at Stewart Records as her assistant Jenny presented her with a message.
"What do you have for me today Jenny T," Miley smiled at the new nickname she had thought of for her assistant Jennifer Tenor.
"I have a message from your ex-wife."
"Uhh what is it this time," Miley sighed.
"She says she can't watch Sam and Jared this weekend," her assistant stated.
"Uhh this is going to be a long day, I can already feel the headache seeping into my head," Miley gritted as she slowly rubbed her temples. "Thank You Jenny," Miley smiled as she punched the numbers into her cordless phone.
"Hello," Lilly stated breathlessly.
"WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM," Miley seethed.
"Which one, and who's asking," Lilly smiled.
"Oh don't give me that shit Lilly you know I can't have Sam and Jared this weekend I have to work," Miley yelled.
"Well no surprise there," Lilly stated. "Your work was always first."
"That is not fucking fair and you know it," Miley screeched. "All you did was sit around on your ass all day making so called "paintings". Someone had to take care of the house, the bills, and our KIDS," Miley shouted.
"Oh don't you dare bring them into this," Lilly sat up starting to get angry.
"Well it seems necessary to bring them up when I get a message from my assistant that my sons mother isn't taking care of him."
"Oh the assistant that your FUCKING," Lilly shrieked.
"Oh not this shit again. You know good and damn well that nothing is going on between Jenny and me," Miley roared.
"Yeah why don't you tell her that," Lilly screamed. "Every time I came to your office or even set my eyes on her she was practically eye-fucking you the whole time."
"Lilly why are you screaming," a sudden voice was heard over the phone.
"I know that you don't have one of your whores over there where my sons are," Miley slowly breathed out as a new set of anger settled inside of her.
"She is not one of my whores," Lilly stated.
"Then what is she Lilly. I am SO TIRED of your shit. You are the laziest worthless piece of garbage that I have ever set my eyes on."
"Oh you know I love it when you talk dirty to me Miles," Lilly smiled.
"You disgust me," Miley seethed.
"Oooh don't make me come up there and ravish you on your office table Miles…again," Lilly grinned.
"Shut your disgusting little mouth," Miley shrieked.
"I wouldn't call it disgusting Miles, since you've known where it's been all too well," Lilly laughed.
"I'll be there in twenty minutes to pick up Sam and Jare," Miley quickly changed the subject.
"Don't worry I'm coming over there now," Lilly stated as she quickly got out of bed.
"What afraid I'm going to meet your little slut," Miley countered.
"No I'm afraid you're going to run into Sydney and we all know how much she hates you now," Lilly said referring to her older sister that held a strong disliking towards Miley.
"Oh," Miley baffled.
"Yeah oh. As much as you would like to think I'm a total piece of trash that poisoned your life sometimes a sister just wants to see her nephews for a little bit before she has to go to the hospital with her sister to visit her mother that fell down the stairs leaving her un-able not take care of her children. I'll be there in ten," Lilly corrected as she hung up the phone.
"I never liked her," Sydney scowled as Lilly pulled her pants on.
"Oh yes you did. You were best friends before we got divorced," Lilly laughed. "Hell you set us up."
"I know I'm sorry about that," Sydney stated still scowling.
"You know you don't have to be such a protective sister all the time. I know you two were super close before we fell apart. You can still talk to her if you want," Lilly sighed.
"Come on we need to get going I'll go wake up the kids," Sydney suddenly stated as she went into the next room and grabbed the sleep whistle on her way.
"Ok time to get up," Sydney screamed as she blew air into the small yellow device and the two kids startled awake.
"Aunt Sid it's nine-thirty in the morning ON A SATURDAY," Sam screeched.
"Oh look who learned how to tell time," Sydney laughed.
"Sid, be nice," Lilly yelled across the house.
"I am," Sydney yelled back. "Now come on your gong to your mom's office today."
"Fine," Sam sighed. "JARED get your lazy ass out of bed."
"SAMUEL," Lilly yelled. "What did I tell you about using that kind of language?"
"Uhh do I have to say it?" Sam asked.
"Yep," Lilly answered.
"If you use words like ass one time or more, than prepare to enjoy getting kicked in yours," Sam sighed.
"Good! Now get your asses up and get dressed," Lilly laughed.
"Wha… I swear I'll never understand parenthood," Sam shook his head. "Fucking ridiculous," he mumbled.
"SAM," Lilly barked.
"HOW DID YOU HEAR THAT," he marveled.
Sam raked his hands across his tongue over and over again in the car on the way to his moms.
"I can't believe you actually WASHED my mouth out with sop," Sam growled.
"Well you should listen more," Lilly smiled.
"Uhh moms not going to be happy when I tell her," Sam smiled.
"Well your moms not to happy to hear anything," Lilly laughed.
"You know I don't get you two," Jared spoke up. "You've been divorced for how long."
"Five years," Lilly answered. "Your thirteen, Sam is fourteen and we separated when he was nine."
"Exactly five years, and you guys still are head over heels in love with each other," Jared smiled.
"Jare Bear your mother is very complicated," Lilly sighed.
"UHHH I hate it when you call me Jare Bear," Jared groaned.
"I know," Lilly giggled as she pulled up to the building.
"Ok crew let's go," Lilly yelled as she screeched to a stop.
Jared, Sam, and Lilly stopped at the front desk as they ran into Katherine the receptionist.
"Hey Lilly, here to see the old ball and chain?" Katherine asked.
"EX-ball and chain," Lilly corrected.
"Well you can't call it ex when you still love each other," Katherine smiled.
"Uhh what is with you guys today? First the kids, and now you," Lilly sighed.
"Well it seems everybody knows it but you two," she smiled.
"Yeah, yeah just let her know I'm here," Lilly laughed as they walked to the elevator and rode up to the top floor.
"Hey Jenny," Sam smiled as he walked out of the elevator.
"Hello Sammy," Jennifer smiled as he stopped at her desk.
"Keep it moving," Lilly stated as she slapped him on the head as she headed into her ex-wife's office.
"Oww," Sam growled as he followed behind his mom.
"Hey mom," Jared and Sam said in unison.
"How are my two favorite boys doin," Miley smiled as she looked up from her paper work.
"Well I'm doing fine but I don't know who your other favorite boy is," Jared smiled.
"Oh you're so funny," Sam fake laughed.
"Oh I meant to tell you they got a new pinball machine in the game room on the fourteenth floor," Miley smiled.
"Well that's how you start a conversation, not with all this I love you shit," Sam beamed.
"SAMUEL," Miley and Lilly scolded in unity.
"Fine, fine, I know. I don't need my mouth washed out AGAIN. Come on Jare," Sam laughed as they ran out of the door.
"Hey HEY get back in here," Lilly yelled.
"Yeah mom."
"I didn't get my proper hug and kiss goodbye," Lilly grinned.
"Uhh bye mom," Sam and Jared quickly exchanged as they gave her a quick hug and kiss on the cheek as they jostled out the door.
"OK let's see. I left their bags in your car I know you never lock your doors, a habit you should change by the way, Jared has football practice Tuesday, and Thursday from four to seven. I have a showing at five but I should be able to pick him up on time, and Sam has a lacrosse game Saturday. He says it's the qualifier for the championship so he wants to know if we could be civil for an hour to watch, and I didn't have time to make them breakfast because I couldn't find a healthy place for them to eat and I know you want them to eat more nutritious food so I figured you could find them something."
"Ok sounds good," Miley smiled. "Oh and I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't know about your mom."
"Ehh. I can't blame you I guess I would get pretty jealous to if I heard you with another girl," Lilly smiled.
"Hey no one said anything about me being jealous," Miley laughed.
"Yeah but I can see it in your eyes now that you were jealous. I was always great at reading your eyes."
"That you were," Miley smiled. "We started dating at thirteen, married at sixteen, and had Sam eight months later. We've spent most of our lives together, so I guess it's easy to say we know each other pretty well."
"My parents had all the faith in the world that we would make it," Lilly smiled. "My mom 'till this day blames me for us splitting up."
"Yeah well she's not the only one."
"Here we go." Lilly sighed. "Everything was Lilly's fault. Let's just point the finger at me like we always do."
"Well who else am I going to blame it on Lilly? You did absolutely nothing to ever help our relationship. I was always there for you, and where were you when I need you."
"You never needed me. That's the problem. I could never help because you would never let me do anything," Lilly screeched.
"Because you always screwed it up. I'd tell you to take out the trash you would take it out but never put another bag in. I'd tell you to put Sam and Jared into their pajamas, you would but you would leave their clothes all over the floor."
"Exactly you would TELL me to do something. You never asked," Lilly countered.
"I would ask you something but I would have to tell you so many numerous times that it went to the point of me yelling and screaming at you, kind of like now."
"NOTHING I EVER DID WAS RIGHT. OH LILLY SHOULD REALLY GET A JOB, LILLY SHOULD STOP BEING SO LAZY, LILLY SHOULD SPEND MORE TIME WITH THE KIDS. NOTHING I EVER DID WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU. I COULD NEVER MAKE YOU HAPPY UNLESS MY HEAD WAS BURRIED BETWEEN YOUR LEGS," Lilly yelled at the top of her lungs.
"Of course. It always comes back to sex," Miley screamed. "That's all you ever wanted."
"Because that was the only time you weren't yelling at me and I actually felt like an equal part in our marriage."
"You know I can't handle this right now. I have work to do and I have to find someone to take care of my appointments for the rest of the day so I can spend time with my kids," Miley sighed.
"Yeah just walk away, like you always do Miles. Just pile up your problems into that gaping hole of your heart that you never let me into," Lilly scoffed as she threw open the door startling a peeping Jennifer. "And you," Lilly started pointing at Jennifer. "When you're sleeping with MY ex-wife just a tip, she loves foreplay. Especially when she's the teacher and you're the naughty school girl, put a short skirt on, and put your hair in some pigtails, get some glasses and she'll go wild."
"LILLY YOU LEAVE RIGHT THIS INSTANT," Miley screamed.
"Don't worry BABE I'm already gone," Lilly yelled back walking to the escalator. "You should be used to hearing that by now anyway," Lilly added as the doors shut.
"UHHH she infuriates me," Miley yelled as she walked into her office and slammed the door shut behind her.
Jennifer slowly went around her desk and opened the door to her boss's office.
"Are you ok Miley," she asked timidly.
"Yeah," Miley sniffled. "I'm just tired of constantly fighting with her."
"Well I think I know a way you could get over her," Jennifer answered shyly.
"What's that?" Miley asked.
"Well when she came out she did get something right. I I'm in love with you Miley Stewart. I have been since the first moment I set eyes on you seven years ago. I never said anything because you were married, and then when you got divorced I just never had the gull to tell you until now" Jennifer admitted.
"Oh Jenny you don't want to get involved with me," Miley sighed.
"And why not," Jenny asked slowly gaining confidence.
"Because I'm still hopelessly in love with my ex-wife," Miley answered sadly.
Lilly grabbed her acoustic guitar as she ran out of the house and went to an all too familiar house. As she approached the side of the house she searched around the ground for a pebble or rock of some kind. Finally finding one she tossed it at the window two floors above her.
Miley Stewart slowly stirred out of her restless sleep as she heard a soft knocking outside her window. Slipping on her slippers she went to her terrace and found a determined looking Lilly Truscott staring up at her.
"Lilly it's eleven o'clock at night people are sleeping what are you doing here?"
"Today when I told you I love you I never got a response."
"Lilly your thirteen years old you don't even know what love is."
"No. Don't you dare do that. Don't insult my intelligence. Now Miley Ray Stewart I love you. I know with everything in my being that I am madly in love with you, and I'm going to marry you one day, and we are going to have so many kids we won't know what to do with them whether you like it or not."
"Lilly just go home you're going to wake the neighbors."
"NO I was thinking tonight about all the things you said, and some of them might be true. I might be irresponsible, I might be impractical, and unpredictable, but I know one thing for sure and that is the fact that I'm so in love with you I don't know what to do with myself."
Suddenly a rope ladder dropped down to the ground giving Lilly the signal to some up. Not giving Miley a chance to change her mind Lilly quickly grabbed her guitar and scurried up the ladder.
"I take it you're giving me a chance," Lilly asked landing on the terrace.
"NO I just want you off my yard," Miley smiled. "What's the guitar for anyway."
"You're getting ahead of yourself I'm getting there. Just give me five minutes to explain myself," Lilly begged.
"I'll give you three and a half minutes," Miley bargained.
"Oh ok that's pretty quick," Lilly chuckled.
"You're wasting time," Miley smiled as she arched her eyebrow.
"Oh right so I was at home miserable because I thought I had just thought I lost you forever," Lilly started.
"You could never lose me forever," Miley cut in.
"Hey don't waste my time," Lilly laughed.
"Sorry continue," Miley giggled.
"Anyway I was at home sulking and I turned on the radio to drown out my sorrow and this sing came on and it summed up my feeling perfectly and I just had to see you. So here it is," Lilly stated as she started to strum lightly.
Call me irresponsible Do my foolish alibis bore you? So, call me unpredictable Call me irresponsible Do my foolish alibis bore you? Call me unpredictable Go ahead call me irresponsible You know it's true
Call me unreliable
Throw in undependable, too
Well, I'm not too clever, I
I just adore you
Tell me I'm impractical
Rainbows, I'm inclined to pursue
Yes, I'm unreliable
But it's undeniably true
That I'm irresponsibly mad for you
Girl, I'm not too clever, I
I just adore you
Tell me that I'm so impractical
Rainbows, I'm inclined to pursue
Yes, I'm unreliable
But it's undeniably true
I'm irresponsibly mad for you
Oh, baby it's true
Lilly ended and waited patiently for a reaction from Miley.
"That was more than three and a half seconds," Miley scolded but couldn't keep up the façade as a grin slipped across her face and she surprised Lilly as she quickly connected her mouth to Lilly's. Lilly was taken aback at first but soon quickly reacted as she moaned into Miley's mouth.
"I take it your giving me a chance," Lilly beamed as she broke apart but soon went in for more.
"Oh where did we go wrong," Lilly pondered as she sat by her mother's hospital bed.
"I wonder the same thing every day," her father smiled.
"Hey dad," Lilly smiled.
"Where are my grand-kids?"
"There at their moms," Lilly smiled.
"Oh ok. So when are you guys going to stop being so stupid and get back together," her father asked.
"Oh not you too dad."
"What. You guys make me so mad sometimes. You were absolutely perfect for each other, and you just threw it all away."
"It's not that simple dad."
"Your mother and I have been married for fifty-four years. What does that tell you?"
"Your old," Lilly smiled.
"You always got your sense of humor from your old man you know that," her father smiled.
"Yeah you never shut up about it," Lilly laughed.
Around ten o'clock Lilly rolled into bed from her exhausting day. As she finally drifted into sleep, her obnoxious phone startled her awake.
"Hello," Lilly yawned as she caught the phone on the last ring.
"Lilly," Miley's urgent voice quickly alerted her.
"Yeah what is it Miles," Lilly questioned springing up from her bed.
"It's Sam," Miley started but soon busted into tears.
"Miles, what happened to Sam?"
"S-s-Sam wa-a-a-was in the st-r-r-ret and a car a-n-d the ground," Miley started.
"Miley, take a deep breath," Lilly started as Miley soon inhaled.
"Ok no tell me what happened and where you are," Lilly stated as she grabbed her car keys and got into her car.
"Sam got hit by a car."