Cookin' with Disaster
Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel. I own Leon/Crisis and Farrah/Persiana.
Chapter 1: Touchdown
"You guys threw away the raisin cookies?"
Kitty Pride, the X-man member Shadowcat, was strapped into the seat of the X-van. Presently, she, Sam Guthrie, the X-man Cannonball, Roberto DaCosta, the X-man Sunspot, Ray Crisp, X-man Berserker, Tabitha Smith, the X-men Boom-boom, Hank McCoy, the X-man Beast, and Logan, the X-man Wolverine, were in the X-van with her. Beast stated,
"Miss Pryde, your cooking skills…leave much to be desired."
He tried to put it delicately as he could. Kitty folded her arms,
"Oh, come on. My cooking was not that bad."
Sam looked at the phasing mutant,
"Ah seem to remember you throwin' away a batch o' muffins and they dented the walkway, not to mention the one muffin that came to life." (1)
Kitty shook her head,
"That was one time, and you banned me from making muffins for life."
Sunspot recalled,
"What about the time you made those flying pancakes that shot laser beams at us?"
Ray joked,
"The ones with the horns or the eyes?"
Boom-Boom shrugged,
"Does it matter? The point is, Kitty Pride is dangerous in the kitchen and should come with a warning label. You know, do not let near kitchen, otherwise insane monsters will come and eat you."
Logan grunted,
"Yer a regular ball o' sunshine, Timebomb."
Tabitha grinned,
"Naturally."
Hank shook his head,
"I also hope to meet my friend here."
Logan said,
"Is it that Simon Williams guy?"
The furry blue ape nodded,
"Why yes. We have a lot to discuss; movies, the occasional drink…"
Ray snickered,
"And you both like long walks on the beach and talking about your feelings."
Roberto laughed,
"Sure he's not talking about you?"
The former Morlock roared,
"DIE!"
He went to strangle his friend and rival when Tabitha pulled out a bomb,
"If you two don't stop, I'll drop one in both your pants. Got it?!"
Ray and Roberto backed off, but kept glaring at each other.
As the X-men pulled up into the West Coast Avengers' Compound, Wolverine's eyes widened,
"Look out!"
He narrowly avoided two teen girls that ran right in front of the moving van; one was a white-fur covered girl wearing red. Her name is Farrah Willows, the heroine Persiana. The other was a blonde woman wearing a one piece outfit and eye mask. Her name is Carol Danvers, the heroine Miss Marvel.
Miss Marvel roared,
"PERSIANA, GET BACK HERE SO I CAN SKIN YOU ALIVE!"
Farrah crowed,
"You'll never take me alive, Barbie!"
She jumped into the trees, which Carol promptly started to uproot. The blonde Air Force brat threw a tree behind her, which hit the X-van, knocking it over. The X-men inside were screaming, until something abruptly stopped them. Tabitha looked out and smiled,
"Hello, hot stuff!"
She was admiring a red-eyed teen who was effortlessly lifting the van up off the ground. His name is Leon Maxwell, the Avenger called Crisis.
Leon lowered the van and asked,
"Is everyone all right in there?"
Sam grumbled,
"Ah'm alive, ah think."
Leon opened the doors and let everyone out,
"I'm sorry about all this. I knew you were all coming; but I had no idea-."
Roberto shouted,
"Cat-fight!"
Sure enough, Carol had found Farrah, and the two girls were engaged in a cat-fight…again. Leon moaned,
"That's the fifth time today, and it's not even nine o'clock."
Tabitha asked,
"Do they fight often?"
The red-eyed hero nodded,
"Yeah, and it's always over me. I've told those two to try and settle their differences, but both of them aren't going to quit until one or the other gets killed."
Kitty blinked,
"That sounds awfully familiar to me."
Tabitha snapped,
"It should, considering it happens all the time between Avalanche and Colossus!"
Leon sighed,
"I've told Carol I'm dating Farrah, but she won't listen. I mean, don't get me wrong, Carol's good looking and everything, but I just like Farrah."
Ray and Roberto continued to cheer on the girls. Tabitha rolled her eyes and threw a time bomb their way. The bomb exploded, sending both teens screaming girlishly into the sky. They both landed with a hard thud on their backs. Cannonball shook his head,
"Ah apologize for those two. They act like they've never seen two girls fight."
Kitty unstrapped herself from the van,
"So, we're staying here while we visit?"
Leon shrugged,
"It wasn't my idea. It was Fury's."
Wolverine grumbled,
"Big surprise."
The red-eyed hero added,
"Well, Fury gave the go ahead, saying something about mutant-human relations."
Beast blinked,
"You are not a mutant."
Crisis smiled sheepishly,
"It's a complicated story. Come on in, I'll introduce you to the rest of the team."
He then looked over and sighed,
"We'll leave them alone. They should wear each other out in a while."
Next Chapter:
The X-men get introduced to the West Coast Avengers. Chaos ensues!
(1) See L1701E's Airtight's Creation Special Edition