Inevitable

summary: Barry didn't know how he could forget his life with Iris, memory zapped or not. What he did know was that moments like this, moments beside Iris, these were the things he'd always remember and Iris plans to make it a night he won't soon forget. [3x21 Cause and Effect episode tag, Sexual content and romantic smut inside]

genre: Romance, Smut

rated: M

warning: adult content below, sexual activities and grown up fun ;)

authors note: title inspiration and lyrics are from "Inevitable" by Anberlin

Do you remember when we were just kids

And cardboard boxes took us miles from what we would miss

...

And laughter took the place of everything we knew we were not

...

I wanna break every clock

The hands of time could never move again

We could stay in this moment

For the rest of our lives

...

I wanna be your last, first kiss

"Okay, when did we start our one gift rule for Christmas," Iris asked from where she sat on one end of the couch, staring over the cup of coffee she nursed between her hands. Barry just rolled his eyes in response from where he sat on the other end. Both of them facing each other from opposite ends, backs leaning against pillows propped against the arms rests. Their legs were entangled as they stretched out across the cushions, Barry's longer legs slightly bent and creating a bump in the blanket shared between them.

"Iris," Barry sighed, sipping on his own cup of coffee. "I told you, I remember everything now."

"Answer the question Barry or I'm inclined not to believe you," she teased, burrowing the toes of her sock clad feet between the back of Barry's sweatpants covered thighs and the cushion below him, relishing in the warmth it provided.

"It was my second Christmas living with you and Joe, so we were twelve, I think," Barry tilted his head as he racked his brain. "I decided it after you spent all your allowance on gifts for me because you felt bad I left most of my toys behind in my old house."

"And you spent all yours on gifts for me because you felt guilty that I had to share everything with you once you moved in," Iris smiled fondly, sipping on the warm beverage as she looked lovingly at her fiancé.

"Now do you believe me?" Barry smiled at her, his feet absently grazing the legging covered thighs of Iris under the blanket. They'd been going at this for over an hour now, even after they had tested him back at STAR Labs once his memory was restored.

"I don't know," Iris teased. "You were pretty out of it, Barr. I might need more proof."

The truth was Iris knew Barry had his memory back. It had been so nice sharing stories with a clueless Barry about their past that she was having fun strolling down memory lane with him now. They had a deep, rich history together and it was nice to revisit those good memories.

Barry placed his coffee cup down onto the end table and shuffled himself till he was sitting more upright on the couch, moving to sit butterfly style atop the cushion and chuckling as Iris had to move her feet from where the were nestled.

"I remember our first day of class together when we were eight. We were assigned desk mates by last names, mine being the first in the alphabet and yours being the last in our class. We had to get to know our classmates by playing a bunch of guessing games," Barry stared at Iris as he shared his memory, moving his hands to massage Iris' feet through the blanket. "We took turns guessing so many things, like favorite food, favorite movie. Yours was mint chocolate chip ice cream and The Little Mermaid. You said it was because the princess saved the hero and you liked that."

"Yours was pizza and Back to the Future, although I believe your exact words were 'the science was questionable but it was funny'. You were such a nerd even at 8 years old," Iris chimed in, sharing a laugh between them before Iris let out a pleased sigh as Barry continued to rub her feet through the blanket.

"Then we got to favorite color. I guessed pink for you and you got offended. And then for me you shouted out red and you were so excited and smiling. I told you that you were right and that you guessed it on the first try," Barry smiled. "But the truth was, Iris, that I didn't have a favorite color. Not until you shouted out red. And then red became my favorite color and has been ever since."

Iris didn't know what to say, her smile softening at Barry's confession. She never knew that before, he'd never shared that before and something about it just twisted her stomach into butterflies. After two decades, Barry Allen gave her butterflies because she was in constant awe of just how much he loved her, had always loved her. She still had a hard time grappling with the fact that she never saw it before, that she had never realized how she had really felt about him their whole lives.

"The truth is Iris," Barry spoke seriously now, hands moving to fidget in his lap where he looked down at them, "I don't know how I could forget my life with you, memory zapped or not."

Iris put her own cup down, less interested in the coffee and fixated now on the words spilling from Barry. She pushed herself back up against the arm rest, pulling her legs to fold beneath her, mirroring Barry's stance as she watched him. He looked so nervous. They were engaged, in love, living together and knew practically everything about each other. Yet somehow, Barry Allen could still get nervous around Iris West and she found it incredibly charming.

"I remember the night I finally decided I was going to confess to you for the first time how I felt about you. I'd thought about it so many times growing up but the first time I had planned it was my first time coming home on break from college. I had this whole big speech planned. Then I saw you, sitting on the couch in a zip up and flannel pants with a cold and I remember just thinking how it didn't matter how I felt. You didn't need my stuff dumped on you, you needed your best friend who'd sit with you while you were sick and watch Disney movies with you because they made you feel better."

Iris reached out to grab his hands, holding them between hers, stopping the nervous fidgeting. He looked up at her then and Iris saw something strange in those green eyes; sadness mixed with joy, love mixed with guilt.

"I remember how on my 23rd birthday you held me while I cried, while I tried to come to grips with the fact that I had now spent more of my life without my mom then I had with her. That I'd spent more time growing up being a part of the West family than I did the Allen family."

Iris watched a tear escape from Barry's eye, feeling her own eyes start to well. She remembered that day clearly. She came home from Jitters, looking to surprise Barry with a birthday lunch and found him sitting against the far wall in his bedroom. His knees were drawn up to his chest, arms wrapped around his legs, hands clenched into his jeans. He was tucked in on himself, looked like he was physically holding himself together to keep himself from falling apart. She had sat beside him, waiting for him to speak when he finally turned to her and told her how that 12 years had gone by since his mom died. He was eleven when she'd died, when Henry was sent to jail. Now that he was 23 he came to the realization that as he got older, the time he had with her would just continue to shrink compared to his life and he was afraid of forgetting her, of losing the feeling of being their son.

She hadn't seen him that broken in a long time and she just wrapped her arms around the huddled young man and held him while cried. They had stayed there for over an hour. Even when the sobs had died and the tears had dried, Iris continued to hold him close to her, sitting pressed against each other in silence because all Barry needed was to not feel alone. She could do that, she could give him that feeling of safety and love.

Iris moved to her knees now and crawled over to Barry's side of the couch. He unfolded himself and welcomed her into his arms as she curled up beside him, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head upon his chest, cuddling deep against him.

"I remember sitting by your bed at the hospital after you got your appendix out when we were 15. I remember you convincing me to sneak out of the house when we were 16 to go to a house party where we tried cigarettes for the first and last time."

"I remember that party. I also remember me being able to hold my alcohol and you throwing up all over street on the walk home," Iris laughed, tracing the STAR Labs design on Barry's sweatshirt she was pressed up against.

"Well, considering Grandma Esther's famous eggnog and her rum cake recipe, a strong tolerance to alcohol must run in the West family," Barry smiled as he ran his fingers through her dark hair with one hand, the other tracing lazy circles over her sweater covered shoulder. "I remember you introducing me to her when she came over for Thanksgiving my first year living with you and Joe. She was so kind to me, welcomed me to the family and hugged me tight, big bear hugs like Joe gives. She always made me feel like part of the family, except she insisted on calling me Bartholomew."

"Grandma Esther always called my dad 'Joseph' so don't take it personally," Iris smiled against his chest.

"You said that then too," Barry chuckled, pulling Iris deeper into his arms. Nothing felt more right than being beside her. The reason he'd come to live with Joe and Iris was awful, earth shattering and heart breaking, but Barry was thankful that they had saved him. He'd tried to fix the past when he created Flashpoint, so badly wanted to save his family he lost. But sacrificing the family he found, the love he found with Joe and Iris and Team Flash was too high a cost. And being here now with Iris beside him was the most full, the most complete he'd ever felt.

"The truth is Iris, our lives together are the only thing I've ever been sure of. The only thing I've ever known for certain was you. More than math and chemistry, you were the only thing I knew more about. Better than equations and chemicals, I knew Iris West," Barry said, moving the hand from Iris' hair to cup the side of her face as she looked up at him. "I remember your favorite everything. I remember every freckle on your skin, every late night chat, our good days and our bad days. Iris, every memory with you is a good one because it's you and me and that is something I can never forget."

Iris smiled up at him, shifting her body till she was was facing him, kneeling between his legs. She moved her hands to cup the sides of his face, thumbs stroking his cheeks and pressed her lips against his. Barry dipped his head to meet hers, kissing her deeply like they had before they were interrupted by HR in the medbay earlier that day.

The truth was Iris remembered everything about Barry and their lives too. Even growing up she knew how deeply she loved him, only being able to realize what that truly meant later in life. Pulling away from the kiss, she repositioned herself till her knees were on either side of his waist, straightening up till she could look down into his green eyes flecked with blue and smiled at him.

"Why don't we make a new memory," Iris suggested, moving till she was straddling Barry's lap. Barry just gazed up at Iris for a long moment, saying nothing, just looking adoringly at her, hand's traveling up Iris' arms, thumbs massaging gently as they moved across her body.

Iris pulled her sweater up over her head and tossed it aside before moving to help pull Barry's sweatshirt up and off. He grabbed her hips then, gentle but firm hands gripping her dark skin as Iris reached down and grabbed Barry by the hair, dipping her head so their lips met in a long, steamy kiss that made both their bodies ache.

In a movement so smooth and agile that Iris couldn't believe considering how clumsy Barry had been as a teen, Barry brought one arm around her waist while the other braced her back and positioned them to sit upright. Iris wrapped her legs around his waist as he stood from the couch, feeling steady in arms that held her tight as he carried her while walking them through the loft and up the stairs to their bedroom.

As they reached the bedroom and Barry's knees hit the end of the bed, Iris slid off his hips to land kneeling atop the mattress. Barry tugged at his sweatpants and boxers, shoving the material down over his hips hastily, Iris laughing as they got caught around his ankle causing Barry to have to awkwardly hop out of them. From strong and smooth to clumsy and awkward, Iris marveled about how much had changed about the boy she grew up with yet some things still remained. She unclasped her bra, tossing it aside as he finally freed himself from the pants gathered around his ankles.

Iris grabbed Barry's wrists and gave a light yank, pulling him towards her. With a smooth movement, Barry came to kneel on the bed, wrapping an arm around her back and leaning down for a kiss. Barry eased Iris down till she was lying on her back, their lips never breaking contact, her hands traveling up to Barry's pale chest and gently squeezing the lean muscle. She loved the contrast of their bodies, her brown skin against his white skin, his light eyes piercing into her dark ones. Just like the contrast of their personalities, opposites but somehow fitting perfectly together like lock and key, designed and created for each other and only each other.

Barry slowly slid down Iris' body as he tongued his way from his fiancé's neck to her stomach, kissing every inch of flesh as he pulled the leggings and panties down, her hands slowly glided over Barry's body as he did.

Her hands threaded through his soft brown hair as his head moved between her legs. He knew just how to drive her crazy with his tongue and Iris was pleased as he seemed to truly remember everything. She arched up from the mattress, tugging slightly at his hair, encouraging his mouth as her thighs fought to stay apart. After what felt like forever but all too soon, Iris felt her whole body tense as he lapped her up and she moaned as her orgasm shook her whole body.

"Barry," Iris panted, chest heaving as he moved back up her body, kissing his way to her lips. Leaning in, he licked along her lips before sliding his tongue into her mouth, twisting their tongues together in slick heat.

With one swift move, Iris wrapped her arms and legs around Barry's body and rolled them over till Barry was on his back, Barry smirking as she hovered over him. Barry reached his hands up to touch Iris but she caught him by the wrists, pinning his arms against the mattress on either side of Barry's head. She leaned over him, staring down at the man who was sweating now in arousal before pressing her lips to his, kissing desperate. Barry groaned as her tongue ravished his, her mouth swallowing his moan.

Iris let go of his wrists then and leaned across his body to reach into the bedside nightstand drawer. His hands massaged her breasts and stomach as she searched the drawer, nearly distracting her as she found a condom. She moved back along his hips slightly to roll the condom onto his awaiting member before positioning herself just right to gradually sink down onto him, the two of them moaning as he entered her. She reached out to run her hands over Barry's stomach, chest, neck, working her hips to take him further in. Barry reached up and threaded his fingers through her hair, surging upward and pulling her head down towards his lips, gasping into each other's open mouths, and then kissing again, and then back to panting into each other's mouths as he thrusted up into her.

They continued their dance, getting lost in euphoria as they moved slow to make it last. Barry could feel himself reaching his max, could see the look on Iris' face he recognized that meant she too was close. He leaned into the crook of Iris' neck, his hot breath against her neck and whispered. Three words, 'I love you' whispered with soft lips pressed deliberately to her ear as she rode him. That was what did it and suddenly she was seeing bright lights behind her eyelids and panting through an orgasm which ripped through her body in waves right before she heard Barry groan loudly out as he reached his own climax, stilling as he came, panting through the pleasure as he pulsed inside her.

Iris then collapsed onto the bed beside him. For a long while the two of them rested there, clasped close by Barry's arms, panting as they both came down from their post-climax high. After a time, Barry slowly eased his embrace and he twisted himself up to bend close over Iris. He gazed down at her for a long moment, saying nothing, just looking lovingly, running his deep gaze over the woman he loved.

Iris just stared up at him for a moment before wrapping her arms around Barry's neck and pulled him down till he was almost lying on top of her, kissing him softly, her fingers running through the short hair damp with sweat, finger tips grazing his scalp.

"Iris," Barry said around a sigh as they parted, smiling down at her.

"I love you, Barry," Iris said, pulling him down to her gently. Barry wriggled his body till he was draped across Iris, head cushioned on her shoulder as her fingers danced along his skin. "I hope you always remember that."