The Detectives
Aerrow was frowning. His leaf-hued eyes swirled with worry as he watched Radarr. There was something off about him. It was either the fact that he looked drained, or that he was wearing hair gel. Make that fur gel. The bridge of the Condor had never been neater—two glass bowls were laid out, with residues of something dark purple in them. The blue sky monkey lay fast asleep on the couch. It was a slumber so heavy that it almost seemed as though he'd been drugged…
The Sky Knight looked up and to his other teammates, who were standing around Radarr and eyeing the situation with equal mystery. Then Piper squealed. She bent down and stared at something on the floor. The others gave her questioning looks. Her lips quivered as she gazed at them. "This is a half-eaten worm," and with that turned a visible tinge of green.
There was a louder, scratchier cry. Finn, who was standing right beside Piper. He doubled back and lost his balance, falling butt-first onto the floor. "That is gross!" he cried, and then proceeded to tenderly touch the worm carcass with his clothed feet. "Ewwww."
Aerrow frowned some more, looking at Stork. "Keep it down, you guys," he advised. "You'll wake Radarr." His expression made it clear that he wanted explanations. And then Junko made another starling discovery.
The Wallop inched closer to the sleeping Radarr and observed, "He looks thinner."
"Oh!" Piper interjected. "I remember that he hadn't eaten a morsel last night…"
"Or for several nights," Aerrow added cautiously, stroking his chin.
"And days," Junko finished. "I mean…Has anyone noticed that he hasn't been touching his food? And it's fried chicken! He loves that!"
"You think he's turning veg?" Finn muttered from the side. He was on his feet again.
"Radarr?" Aerrow scoffed, "Vegetarian! No way. But we'll ask him when he wakes up."
Stork asked another good question. "Where did he find the wine from?" and he pointed at the empty glass bowls, that were smelling strongly of alcohol. The merb picked them up. "Yes, I see remains of a purple liquid. And it reeks of wine."
Two other questions came up. One from Piper, which was: "Are Sky Monkeys supposed to have alcohol? Because I know dogs aren't…"
And the other belonged to Finn, and it made him look like a bit of an idiot. "You think he was having a date?" and he said it in all seriousness, too.
Aerrow and Piper snickered. Junko stared, and Stork frowned. "A date?" the merb repeated in disbelief and scorn. "I think we'd notice if there were two Sky Monkeys on this ship at the same time! And that doesn't explain his anorexia! And if we don't find the cure, his body will slowly get thinner and thinner, and then he'll die."
"That's enough," Aerrow said quickly. "No one's going to die, okay?" He sounded a bit panicky, however. "Look, let him wake up. We'll ask him about it…We might take him to the vet, too."
Junko shuddered. "I hate vets."
And all the other Hawks murmured in agreement.
Aerrow cleared his throat. "So, yeah, let him be. We'll start on the chores. When he wakes up, we'll sort him out, okay?" His teammates seemed to agree, and all of them dispersed. Junko and Aerrow both went to the hangar and Piper inched to the kitchen. Finn watched as Stork went to the control board of the Condor. The sharpshooter had to do the ironing, a job he would love to procrastinate. And anyway, Radarr was his friend, and he was worried.
Besides, he thought he was on to something.
He knew something weird had been going on, because his hair gel kept getting stolen. Which wasn't cool, because he was the Finnster, and he liked his hair gel. Seeing as he was usually the only one on the Condor to use it, he was a bit curious when he discovered that his brand new pot of the thing had gotten over in two days. Even he didn't use that much. And then he'd found suspicious blue strands hair on his bed. Only one word. Radarr. And this lovely morning was proof.
Because Radarr was wearing hair gel.
And he was prepared to bet that the said cosmetic belonged to him.
"You're serious?" Finn asked. "You don't think he can get a girlfriend?"
Stork turned and gave Finn a smart, suave look. "I don't think he can get a girlfriend and hide it. I understand if you and Junko and even Aerrow wouldn't notice, but between Piper and I, we'd have figured something."
"Maybe he's good at keeping it a secret?" Finn suggested.
"Seems unlikely that he's that good."
"C'mon, Stork. Look at the evidence. Wine, hair gel?"
Stork gave Finn an amused look. Perhaps wondering how Finn even knew the word 'evidence'. "Standing alone," Stork said, "I'd agree with you. But he looks underfed, and you can't deny it. What has that got to do with having a girlfriend?"
Finn smirked. "Maybe she's so ugly that he loses his appetite." Which made him receive a condescending glare from the merb.
"Yeah...somehow, I don't think so." But Stork relented. A part of what Finn said did make sense. (Oh no, the horror!). "Look, find me proof that the anorexia has something to do with your theory and I might just believe you." And the merb gave an evil grin. "Consider it your own personal project."
The sharpshooter raised an eyebrow. "I just gave you a perfect assumption about why he's not eat-"
"Something more sensible."
"Oh."
"So, are you up for it?" Stork prodded.
Finn couldn't decipher the look in the merb's eyes. He seemed very..."Let me get this straight. You're giving me permission to go snooping into Radarr's love-life. Is that it?"
"Yes." The answer was so flat and serious that to Finn, it felt like a punch in the gut. Stork elaborated, "I don't want Radarr to die of starvation, you know."
"Oh," Finn muttered, shrugging. "Makes sense. And yes. I'm up for it."
"Good! Go. Shoo." And then Stork brushed him off like old news.
Well, whatever. Finn had just been given official permission to be up to no good. He could help Radarr get his appetite back in the process. And more importantly, he could avoid doing the ironing.
Really. What more could a guy want?
A/N: TBC. And may I warn you that updates might be slow. Hopefully I'll have time in the Christmas Holidays, but my exams start from Monday, and I won't be able to come online for a week.
So thanks a ton for reading, and please leave a review. They really motivate me to write more. I hope you liked this, because I had a lot of fun writing it. :)