A/N: I don't see the point of a disclaimer, cos, isn't this site for people to write stories inspired by stories that already exist? But still, consider everything disclaimed. I own nothing.
Now, about the story, well, I've never read a Ron/Hermione fanfic, so I don't know what they look like. Still, I hope you like and enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Make me smile; review.
It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-George Eliot
He had left her.
It was the only thought that clouded up his mind, the only five words that rang out, over and over.
He had left her.
Again, that voice! It was his voice, he was aware, but he hated it more and more, every time he heard it. That sad tone…
It had been weeks, and it just wouldn't fade away.
He did the right thing, didn't he? It was what he wanted. Yes, of course it was. Of course. But, the more he tried to convince himself of it, the more he failed.
He had left her.
It was the biggest mistake of his life (yet). He realised that, and he hated himself for it. He was all alone, but he wasn't the only one... And, why did he only think of Hermione, then? His best friend was abandoned too, and what made Ron even more selfish, was that he rarely thought of him. Not as often as Hermione came in his thoughts, anyway. Ron loved Hermione, he always had. And now, he ruined everything. He didn't fear her hatred, he feared for her life. He wasn't around to protect her.
And then came the second voice, slightly sadder than the first.
He had left them.
The two people besides his family who meant the world to him, the two people he had chosen all by himself to love. They say, the relatives we ought to love, but the friends we get to choose.
At the present moment, he could not think of a reason that was a good enough excuse for his behaviour. What he had said to Harry, he wished he could have meant it, that way, just maybe, this regret and pain wouldn't kill him so slowly. But of course he didn't mean it. Not a single word. But – wait, what? How could he wish such a thing? Perhaps it was the selfish side of him speaking again, back there. A good friend would have never spoke or even thought of such things. No. A good friend would not do what he had done.
But Ron Weasley was not a good friend.
He was a best friend.
And that made everything even worse. Because, Ron couldn't imagine, not even in his wildest and happiest dreams a place where Harry and Hermione would forgive him for leaving. He knew for a fact that he would never be able to forgive himself.
How did he manage to hurt himself so badly with just one stupid action, such a stupid mistake?
And, taking a notice in his pain, he could not bear to imagine how much he had hurt Harry and Hermione.
Especially Hermione…
She probably hated him now. Maybe she didn't even think of him at all, because she couldn't stand the idea of him. Maybe she didn't love him the way he loved her… Probably.
She had never chosen him, nor had she said anything like that on his account.
So maybe she didn't love him.
It might have been the reality, and the consideration ached. He blamed himself for his own lack of simple observation. Or was it intuition? Maybe he didn't belong there, with her, so that's why he left.
But, didn't he left willingly?
Hermione did yell after him. He could still hear her voice as if she had spoken to him only minutes before.
"Ron, no — please — come back, come back!"
He just ran. She asked him to stay, but he left her. He had left them.
What it if was the way it was supposed to be? Things happen for a reason, it doesn't matter how obvious the reason is. Ron never believed in such things as faith, but maybe this did happen for a reason, and maybe, just maybe, it was for the better. No one can fight faith, they say, but that didn't mean that we're forbidden to be dissatisfied with it. Ron was, certainly. Many times he had wished to change what had happened, but the reality welcomed him (and it was never a warm welcome) with the fact that he simply could not.
Ron closed his eyes, fighting the tears, because he knew they wouldn't help him, anyhow.
"Are you staying, or what?" He had asked her, and it was only now he wished he didn't. Now he regretted having a reason at all to ask her that question.
"I . . ." She looked anguished, and the memory of her expression made one tear roll down his cheek. "Yes — yes, I'm staying. Ron, we said we'd go with Harry, we said we'd help —"
She had chosen Harry, hadn't she?
Wiping the tear that had reached his chin, Ron tried to ignore the fact. However, he could not ignore that he felt that way.
Hermione chose Harry, she didn't want to be with Ron. And, she yelling after him was just an instinct, because, after all, they had spent so much together. Yes, that was about right, wasn't it? Hermione didn't love Ron. The reason it changed so much was that Ron loved Hermione. He had known for so long, but he never brought himself to tell anyone, not even Harry. But it was obvious, wasn't it? Of course both of them knew how he felt about her. Was that why Hermione was nice with him, so close to him all along?
That couldn't be right. Could it?
Hermione was nice to everyone. He probably was just a part of 'everyone' to her. But no, definitely not.
Why couldn't he make up his mind once and forever of what he wanted?
He knew who he loved and who were the people he wanted to be with forever, but why did he leave, then? What was so bloody powerful to manage to change his mind? Now, he wasn't sure of everything. He realised it was one thing want, and other to have. He couldn't have what he wanted, and it was all his fault. He had no one to blame, and that's probably what made it harder to face.
He wished (again, those wishes!) it was the other way around, only…
He had left and he better stopped regretting it, because that wouldn't change anything.
But, he couldn't…
Because, what if they needed him as much as he needed them, and he didn't even know it? What if they needed him more they he needed them? If they were in danger, he wouldn't be able to protect them… to protect Hermione. And all that, just because he wasn't with them.
He had left her.
The burning, sick curiosity to know what they were doing ruled over him, every bloody day. Maybe Hermione really chose Harry and his absence and time had only drawn them closer, even if not in the way he'd most feared. But was jealousy a good reason to stand between them to make her choose? Was it fair like he once thought it was? He knew the answer to that question. It most definitely wasn't fair, because Harry was her friend too. It had always been the three of them; Harry, Ron and Hermione.
When something happened, who was involved in any way? Harry, Ron and Hermione. Who discovered the Sorcerer's stone and the Chamber of secrets? Harry, Ron and Hermione. And everything else. Always the three of them. They manage to find the first horcrux together, did they? Of course it had to be all three of them to look for the horcruxes.
Why didn't he mind it before that Harry was always there when he was next to Hermione?
…
Now what? He'd really lost her now.
He had lost both his best friends, and the possibility that he would probably never see them was very big.
Or, that's what he thought until he heard Hermione's voice.
First, he thought he had imagined it, but then wondered why he heard it come from his pocket, where his deluminator was. So he took it out, and stared at the object for a number for seconds. Then, he clicked it.
A light appeared before him, and for some reason, he know what he had to do.
With a smile, he started for his closed and packed his things.
He had lost them, but now he was given a second chance, a chance to find them and try to fix everything.
So maybe she didn't love him, but maybe it didn't even matter. Ron Weasley was a best friend, and it might have been a little bit late realisation, but he knew a best friend would have to back, no matter what. A best friend always found a way.
So maybe some things did happen for a reason, after all…